Story Hey, I´m Ana, I´m new and I´m about to do it

[sully]

Hi guys. I´m new here and I would like to be a part of this community while i still can.

My name is Ana. The thing is I am very very sick. But not in a way that Im dying right now (I wish) but I am about to be in a helpless position untill the rest of my life. Probably, very soon too. I can´t do that, obviously. If I´m lucky enough I can probably get assisted suicide but it is problematic. It´s a long process, I´m not sure they will agree and also the sad thing is my family is against it. I´m young so people think that you should suffer for many years and then maybe end your life. I think it´s sadistic.

So I am thinking about doing it myself obviously. First off, it makes me furious that suicide is actually so complicated. I used to think that it´s enough to choke on many pills of any kind. But I see that people fail here with SN process and it makes me sad. Also in a couple of days I will get my order of SN, I can post pictures in this thread of how it´s gonna look like.

I know my attitude might seem weird but in my case ending my life to me is a good thing, an exit. There is no other choice for me so I am very calm and accepting about it. The problem is that it is actually so difficult to die which only makes it more desireble. I have no time to be scared of it.

I will post another threads about other topics and give updates about my journey. Hope that I will become a part of this community at least for a short time. :)

 

[livinginthepast]

Hi Ana you can pm me if you like

 

[sully]

Hi Ana you can pm me if you like

hi. I don´t mind. once I figure out how to do that..

 

[noname223]

I am sorry to hear that life unfair to you. I would be interested what your illness is but only if you want to share it.

 

[nobodyspecial]

Hi, Ana. Welcome to the community.

 

[sully]

I am sorry to hear that life unfair to you. I would be interested what your illness is but only if you want to share it.

I understand that people are interested. Still I´d prefer not to share my diagnosis, it makes me anxious. Basically it´s a kind of illness where there is no treatment at all (not studied well enough) and there is no way to get a remission or something like that. It just progresses slowly. In my case quite rapidly.

 

[FuneralCry]

Welcome to the community, I'm sorry that life has been cruel to you. I wish you well.

 

[aminend]

Hi Ana, all of us are passenger in this community.

 

[suisuiforum]

Really sorry that you're experiencing such a serious illness. It is truly unimaginably cruel when people who don't understand your situation are withholding RTD and subjecting you to more pain simply because they do not ideologically agree with it. You absolutely deserve to choose when to go instead of suffering for many years for the sake of others. I hope things go well for you in the future.

 

[chocolatebar]

Hi Ana. Welcome to the community. I hope your time here is as pleasant as possible.

I'm always sad when I see people in your situation, victims of the unfairness and disdain from nature, while I have a good health and want to die as well. I wish I could give my health to someone like you, but that's not how thing work...

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Hi Ana,
Welcome to the community. Sorry for your pain. I wish you the best and a peaceful exit.
Most everyone is supportive on here. I'm grateful to have found this community. It helps so much just being able to talk to people who understand and won't judge. (Most people)
For whatever reason someone decided to CTB there's support.

 

[Jumping_realms]

I'm sorry you are going through this, but envy your boldness.

 

[rotten]

Hey Ana,
I'm sorry about your illness.... Welcome aboard.

 

[Bullit]

Welcome! We are happy to have you among us. I hope maybe things will go a bit better for you.

 

[Marktheghost]

Hi Ana. You can pm me too if you like. Especially if you live anywhere near Scotland.

 

[sully]

Hi Ana. You can pm me too if you like. Especially if you live anywhere near Scotland.

Hi, I am from Europe but not Scotland unfortunately. I wish I had to time to go there, I know it's a beautiful country :)

I'm sorry you are going through this, but envy your boldness.

Well, illness does that to you unfortunately. The only thing I'm afraid of if it doesn't work out, not death

 

[Neowise]

Hey Ana, welcome on SS! It's so sad to hear what brought you here. In the meanwhile most of us are sitting here with perfect health and can't wait for life to finally end. Life just isn't fair.
I hope you have an enjoyable time on the forum!

 

[OnlyTheWind]

Hope you have a nice stay here :)

 

[sully]

Hey Ana, welcome on SS! It's so sad to hear what brought you here. In the meanwhile most of us are sitting here with perfect health and can't wait for life to finally end. Life just isn't fair.
I hope you have an enjoyable time on the forum!

I hope people here don't get the wrong idea that I have it harder or something. We all suffer and if anyone is suicidal there is always a good reason for that

I hope noone feels guilty because of my thread, I understand that everyone here is in pain

 

[Neowise]

I hope people here don't get the wrong idea that I have it harder or something. We all suffer and if anyone is suicidal there is always a good reason for that

I hope noone feels guilty because of my thread, I understand that everyone here is in pain

Oh, I didn't mean to make it sound like X has it harder or Y should be happy with what they have. I just tried to say something nice In the end we are all sitting in the same boat.

 

[Winklemate]

You know, to some extent I can get the rationale behind most anti-suicide positions. I don't agree with any of them, but most of it I can understand. But when someone has an incurable disease that just leaves suffering, whether it be something like ALS, Lewey Body Demetia, or whatever illness you have, I don't understand how anyone could have a problem with assisted suicide. Why the would ever want to subject someone to abject misery? Sadistic is a great word for.

Anyway, I don't want to rail on stuff you already know, so Ana f nothing else I'm glad you seem to have found peace with the idea of death. I think, even in your situation where your hand is basically forced by illness, that could be a very tough thing to achieve mentality. I hate that the actual process of accomplishing is so frustratingly difficult, and I hope you best, and that how ever long you'll be on here til the end, this site can provide some alleviation.

 

[sully]

Th

You know, to some extent I can get the rationale behind most anti-suicide positions. I don't agree with any of them, but most of it I can understand. But when someone has an incurable disease that just leaves suffering, whether it be something like ALS, Lewey Body Demetia, or whatever illness you have, I don't understand how anyone could have a problem with assisted suicide. Why the would ever want to subject someone to abject misery? Sadistic is a great word for.

Anyway, I don't want to rail on stuff you already know, so Ana f nothing else I'm glad you seem to have found peace with the idea of death. I think, even in your situation where your hand is basically forced by illness, that could be a very tough thing to achieve mentality. I hate that the actual process of accomplishing is so frustratingly difficult, and I hope you best, and that how ever long you'll be on here til the end, this site can provide some alleviation.

Thank you, your message was very nice to read. I think age is the big issue here. And also my family won't support me in as, there is no way.

 

[Tav]

Hi Ana, i'm very sorry you are going through this. I too suffer from a debilitainting disorder albeit a mental one.
Suicide methods can be complicated and risky. I wish there was something like nembutal available to anyone cheaply.
Do you believe in life after death?

 

[sully]

Hi Ana, i'm very sorry you are going through this. I too suffer from a debilitainting disorder albeit a mental one.
Suicide methods can be complicated and risky. I wish there was something like nembutal available to anyone cheaply.
Do you believe in life after death?

Hey! I'm sorry that it happened to you too. Life sucks like this. I just posted a thread called so you died I am talking about it in there, you're welcome to share your thoughts