Venting Help me to free myself from this pain

[Idideverythingwrong]

Here we are, I am stuck in a routine of sleep and medication, avoiding all my friends, isolating myself from the whole world.
My family is destroyed to see me this way, they love me very much and support me to continue in therapy, they bet that my brain can be repaired.
The worst of all is that I lied to them a great part of my life, I deceived them to continue consuming and to be able to maintain my addiction active.
And here we are, I have been in bed for months and I do not leave my house, my mental condition is deplorable.
I can't stand the damage I did to my family.
How ungrateful I was to them.
How I did not value them and despise their love.
I really need to leave this week, there is no method I can do in the comfort of my home.
This is a real hell, I just want to rest forever, I have already failed in life.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

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Sanctioned Suicide Welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, a suicide discussion forum. We provide a safe space to discuss the topic of suicide without the censorship of other places, as well a community that can understand you and let you be yourself without judging you or forcing you to do anything...

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[Idideverythingwrong]

Rules and FAQ

Sanctioned Suicide Welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, a suicide discussion forum. We provide a safe space to discuss the topic of suicide without the censorship of other places, as well a community that can understand you and let you be yourself without judging you or forcing you to do anything...

sanctioned-suicide.net

At no time did I ask for help with a specific method.
I was just venting a little about my problems, not everyone has access to therapy
I just needed to be heard
I apologize if it was interpreted otherwise

 

[whywere]

I feel your pain, and I would like to mention the fact that after rereading your thread many times I came aways with such a strong feeling of love and compassion in you.

You ARE NOT failed at life. I REALLY feel you as I have massive depression, BPD, heck everything and I struggle each and every day and WE are ALL family here and you are a wonderfully thoughtful person.

NO, I do NOT ever say things that my heart does not mean ever, no B.S. with me ever, I truly mean what I say, you are wonderful.

I hear you loud and clear and please remember that you ARE family to/for me, as I have no family nor friends and it is folks like YOU who bring joy to me, thank you for that aspect.

Walter

 

[Idideverythingwrong]

I feel your pain, and I would like to mention the fact that after rereading your thread many times I came aways with such a strong feeling of love and compassion in you.

You ARE NOT failed at life. I REALLY feel you as I have massive depression, BPD, heck everything and I struggle each and every day and WE are ALL family here and you are a wonderfully thoughtful person.

NO, I do NOT ever say things that my heart does not mean ever, no B.S. with me ever, I truly mean what I say, you are wonderful.

I hear you loud and clear and please remember that you ARE family to/for me, as I have no family nor friends and it is folks like YOU who bring joy to me, thank you for that aspect.

Walter

Thank you walter I appreciate it very much

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand just wanting to be free from all the suffering, to rest forever is all I personally hope for. But anyway I wish you the best, I hope that you find peace.