Having difficulty making a will, strange lawyers

[Esokabat]

I am in Europe. I tried to make a will that consisted of leaving things for my family, asked to be cremated, and asked not to be put on machines or kept alive artificially if I am in a coma, lose decision making power due to brain damage, or dementia. The lawyer told me that she has never seen a will like this and she declined. I contacted the second lawyer and I now emitted everything except leaving things for my family and the fact that I would like to be cremated. I deleted everything else. The cremation part is important to me as I live in a country where I have zero relatives. My parents live in a different country and don't speak the language. And I didn't want people from a foreign country asking them what to do with their child's body. The second lawyer took the assignment but excluded the part about the cremation and just drafted the part about leaving my things to my family. And she recommended that I just simply take out a funeral insurance and they will take care of everything. Obviously I didn't tell her that the insurance has CTB as exclusion so it is worthless to me. And yet, no mention of cremation in the draft of my will. And I don't know if I should push it or not as I am not yet old enough to worry about cremation versus burial. Based on my experience with these two lawyers, it appears to me that in the country where I live, it is not usual to include information about cremation versus burial? At this point, I don't know if I should just accept this will or push my luck? Or should I just include my cremation request in my handwritten CTB note? The fact is, I have nobody in the country where I live, to take care of funeral arrangements, etc. I am completely alone here. So I thought that including cremation in my will made sense. But it appears that in the particular European country I am in, the everyday lawyer does not include this in a will. I think they assume family will take care of these details. I only had ideas about what a will look like from American movies, where they have a lot of content in the will. Here, it seems the only thing they want you to indicate what percentage of your assets goes to whom. And that's it. Dry and clean. Nothing else to discuss. My lawyer already sent the draft to the notary. Should I still try to insist on including the cremation part? If I would be older, I would fight for it. But since I am not very old, I don't know how much attention to draw to this

 

[ham and potatoes]

Usually, wills are just what you want done with your assets after your dead.
Usually burial/cremation request arnt part of it, but a separate "final wishes" paper most people will fill out. It's not legally binding or anything.
As far as not being kept alive with machine, that is something different all together. That is called a "living will"
At least that's what those are called here in the US.

 

[Esokabat]

Usually, wills are just what you want done with your assets after your dead.
Usually burial/cremation request arnt part of it, but a separate "final wishes" paper most people will fill out. It's not legally binding or anything.
As far as not being kept alive with machine, that is something different all together. That is called a "living will"
At least that's what those are called here in the US.

Ah, I see. So maybe that is the issue then. That makes sense. Thank you!

 

[ham and potatoes]

If you want to insure you are cremated, your best bet is to pre arrange/ pre pay for it, and leave that paperwork with your will for whoever finds if
living will info
final wishes example

 

[Esokabat]

If you want to insure you are cremated, your best bet is to pre arrange/ pre pay for it, and leave that paperwork with your will for whoever finds if
living will info
final wishes example

This is very useful, thank you

 

[Artemisia]

I guess it doesn't help much as we're most likely in different countries, but I signed my will only a few days ago and the very first point was exactly about the funeral. At first I had told the notary to write that I should be cremated, but at the last moment decided to ask her to remove it as I might change my mind for some reason and didn't want it to vinculative. In my case, my friends already know what I want and I trust them to carry it through.
As for medical procedures, that's an interely different thing. Lawyers and notaries have nothing to do with it, here it has to be registered at a statal health center, so that it goes into the system and doctors have access to it without the family's intervention.

 

[ham and potatoes]

Oh no problem. I had to do allot of digging to find this stuff out myself a while back. Figured I'd pass it on

 

[J&L383]

I am in Europe. I tried to make a will that consisted of leaving things for my family, asked to be cremated, and asked not to be put on machines or kept alive artificially if I am in a coma, lose decision making power due to brain damage, or dementia. The lawyer told me that she has never seen a will like this and she declined. I contacted the second lawyer and I now emitted everything except leaving things for my family and the fact that I would like to be cremated. I deleted everything else. The cremation part is important to me as I live in a country where I have zero relatives. My parents live in a different country and don't speak the language. And I didn't want people from a foreign country asking them what to do with their child's body. The second lawyer took the assignment but excluded the part about the cremation and just drafted the part about leaving my things to my family. And she recommended that I just simply take out a funeral insurance and they will take care of everything. Obviously I didn't tell her that the insurance has CTB as exclusion so it is worthless to me. And yet, no mention of cremation in the draft of my will. And I don't know if I should push it or not as I am not yet old enough to worry about cremation versus burial. Based on my experience with these two lawyers, it appears to me that in the country where I live, it is not usual to include information about cremation versus burial? At this point, I don't know if I should just accept this will or push my luck? Or should I just include my cremation request in my handwritten CTB note? The fact is, I have nobody in the country where I live, to take care of funeral arrangements, etc. I am completely alone here. So I thought that including cremation in my will made sense. But it appears that in the particular European country I am in, the everyday lawyer does not include this in a will. I think they assume family will take care of these details. I only had ideas about what a will look like from American movies, where they have a lot of content in the will. Here, it seems the only thing they want you to indicate what percentage of your assets goes to whom. And that's it. Dry and clean. Nothing else to discuss. My lawyer already sent the draft to the notary. Should I still try to insist on including the cremation part? If I would be older, I would fight for it. But since I am not very old, I don't know how much attention to draw to this

It may be that in your country you can't put your method of disposition of your body in your will. But you can make that as your request. However, family members don't have to abide by that. I think you could arrange ahead of time for cremation expenses, but again it's possible whoever's handling your estate could deny that. Even though you're young, you should be able to do a will, it's only prudent in these "unpredictable" times.

 

[BIGMIKE]

Those are HORRIBLE lawyers. Their only job is to create the will exactly as dictated by you. There is absolutely no reason for them to do anything besides shut up and write it down. If you've asked for DNR or not to not be kept on life support, that's asking for a living will. If the lawyer doesn't recognize this they're now incompetent.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I had the cremation part included in my will, but I am in the US. I even upfront paid for a cremation and included all the details in my will. My "will" is just that, my "will", and it is entirely appropriate to include my "will" to be cremated in my last will and testament. Things may be done differently where you are. As far as specifying one's will and desire regarding medical and health concerns should one become incapacitated and unable to make those types if decisions for themselves, we have another type of will for those things called a living will. I didn't have drafted one of those, but it isn't a bad idea.

 

[Esokabat]

I had the cremation part included in my will, but I am in the US. I even upfront paid for a cremation and included all the details in my will. My "will" is just that, my "will", and it is entirely appropriate to include my "will" to be cremated in my last will and testament. Things may be done differently where you are. As far as specifying one's will and desire regarding medical and health concerns should one become incapacitated and unable to make those types if decisions for themselves, we have another type of will for those things called a living will. I didn't have drafted one of those, but it isn't a bad idea.

Thank you. I am a few years from turning 50. Wouldn't it be suspicious if I pre-pay a cremation?

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Thank you. I am a few years from turning 50. Wouldn't it be suspicious if I pre-pay a cremation?

I don't see why it would be. All kinds and ages of people are "pre-planning" their funerals, and cremations are a part of that, too. For one thing, doing so locks in the price. It's not like they ask you why you're doing it. As far as relatives finding out, why tell them? It's your business, not theirs. Just make sure all the documents are easily accessible for someone to find.