Venting Have you ever gotten a helpful response when you tried to reach out to anyone?

[thedevillily]

So lately, all I think about is suicide. Not how to improve my life, because that seems impossible. Not personal hygiene or doing dishes or laundry, just being dead and no longer having to worry about any of this shit.

Last night, I tried reaching out to my spouse for... I have no fucking idea what reason honestly, he's always been less than worthless whenever I try to talk about what I'm going through mental health wise. Being married to him is like being responsible for a toddler - just another useless baggage I have to do things for, not anyone I could ever talk to about anything serious.

I think a huge reason that I need to hurry up and just CTB already is because of the type of responses I get in the moments of weakness when I try to talk to someone about what is going on. Nothing shows you how amazingly vapid, useless and unconcerned the people around you are like trying to get help with a serious problem. His response was to bitch at me for not doing enough housework and for sleeping on the couch when I have insomnia.

Just wondering if anyone on here has ever gotten something resembling a helpful response when trying to talk about their feelings with people who are close to them. I think that you either understand the feeling of needing to die or you don't. And the people who don't get it are on the other side of a wall from us - they can't help. I don't even really want help, I'm just afraid to actually pull the trigger. Should probably shut up before I end up in a hospital.

 

[sevenkarmas]

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's painful when people that we trust and invested time into seem so self-centered and completely deaf to the hurt we are going through.

My mother is a therapist. I have two friends I worked with that have been checking on me frequently. I don't tell them anything. I share the losses and wins regarding the ongoing process of the divorce, but I'm really careful not to discuss my feelings. With my mom, I'm careful not to talk about ending things and I make a point of talking about things I'm going to do after everything is finalized. She still texts me everyday and calls at least twice a week, so I think she suspects. However, I know I won't get help because I'm not sharing everything.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Depends on what you mean by helpful. If you mean things that made me want to live, I'm afraid nothing could. But I have gotten supportive and empathetic responses. And I've gotten harmful responses, like being berated or even having EMS called on me.

 

[SamTam33]

Nope. At the very least, someone could've asked for more insight as to why I felt suicidal. Pretend to empathize.

But nah, they go straight to the Idiot's Handbook and start saying why I shouldn't die. Or they call the cops on you. They pretend like they didn't hear you. They try to change the subject.

No one really cares about you outside of what you do for them.

For example, if you tell your parents and they start crying - they're probably crying thinking of living THEIR life without you. They aren't crying because they are the root cause of your pain; they're not crying over mistakes they made that lead to this.

 

[GlassAlwaysEmpty]

I was on the phone to a psychiatrist today for over an hour, and to be fair to her she did try but I kept telling there's nothing she or anyone can do to change how I feel.
She tried to convince me I needed to be hospitalized, I said there's no way I'm agreeing to that.
Did that hour phone call help me at all? Not at all. But that wasn't her fault, I said no one can help me.

So I don't see the point in reaching out, I'm too far gone now for anyone to help me.

 

[punkarmadillo]

No, they end blaming me for everything wrong and that just makes me more determined. The only reason I'm still existing is I'm going to make damned sure it works when I do CTB. No f ups. No turning back.

 

[punkarmadillo]

My above comment has been proven by the actions of my spouse Yesterday.

 

[vultureilse]

i dont think theres anything anyone could say to make me less suicidal. i feel slightly better when someone responds with kindness and i really appreciate them caring enough to say something but the advice itself doesnt really help, i want to die no matter what

 

[ge0rge]

i try not to share too much these days since i know that a lot of people genuinely do not know how to respond to these kinds of things, the ensuing silence and awkwardness are offputting tbh

 

[arcadia]

no. i'd imagine it's frustrating but as said above me, most people have no experience in this stuff and are not trained professionals. they don't know what to say, it's foreign to them. the best people can do is offer vague advice for self improvement, and be there for emotional support.

 

[lukas19]

no