Moreofthesamepain
Member
- Apr 25, 2020
- 40
My sn came today. My plan is 600mg ibuprofen, followed by 100 mg sequel as an alternative dopamine blocker, double dose of tagament, 3mg ativan for anxiety leading to sn and maybe a Reece cup to mask the taste. I'm not sure when I'm doing this. But thats the plan. Any advice? I can't take life anymore. I've been considering it for a very very long time. Overdose is too unreliable, charcoal too difficult to execute and unreliable, partial hanging si kicked in and I probably have some degree of brain damage from trying. i have a gun but its too small a caliber to be effective and i don't want to go that way, although I've held 2 other guns to my head that would do the job. Sn seems my last resort. I just want peace. I know how much pain it will cause those who love me. But I wish they could understand my own pain...actually I don't. No one who loves life should have to see all the harm I've done to myself in multiple multiple ways. Suicide just seems like my destiny. I hate what it will do to others but I hate what I've done to myself. I hate they've witnessed my decline. I've lived well most of my years, well part of them anyway. but it seems the clock is ticking for me. This virus will change the world more than it already has. The death toll keeps going up, food and medical supply is going down. And the ignorance and infighting of our governments goes up. No one can agree on what all feels utterly hopeless and like the end of days. Its all too much.
