Hair loss destroying me…

[Humdinger2023]

I've hesitated to focus on this topic when posting on this site, as it seems superficial and I've not found people who I can relate to or who might understand what I'm going through right now. I've had a severe loss of hair in recent months, a process that started to occur in the last few years but became particularly acute in the last couple of months. Not only has the hair fallen out in chunks, but the color has darkened dramatically and the texture has changed. My soft blonde hair that once defined my look has now faded and become stringy, unhealthy and scary thin. I've worn extensions over the years to add volume and because my job focused on my appearance (I used to be in front of the camera as a broadcast journalist, I'm no longer doing that.) I'm unable to wear my hair down out of the house, instead keep it up to disguise the hair loss, and have even spent thousands of dollars on a new wig that finally arrived last week after months of waiting for it to be custom made. I've spent the last few days trying to adjust to the look and feel of the wig, but it's ugly and so artificial, I find it itchy, uncomfortable and it gives me a headache. The day I got it fitted and picked it up was traumatic as I can't believe my life has gotten to this point. I wish I could understand why this is happening to me, the doctor has only pointed to a vitamin D deficiency but that doesn't feel like a full explanation. It feels like I've lost a limb or that I've recently become deformed. I have zero confidence to embrace wearing wigs and don't know how to adopt that type of lifestyle, missing activities I used to enjoy like swimming…the list of limitations due to wigs is long to me... I wish someone I knew had this same problem so I could share my experience or find answers… the most I've been able to do is follow social media accounts of other women that highlight hair loss and wig wearing. My identity for so long was tied to my appearance and now I can barely look in the mirror, have lost hope and pretty much don't take care of myself or feel worthy. I'm essentially a hermit and don't leave my home, I don't socialize and work remotely so I'm not even communicating with people in a work place environment. I've been focused on a suicide plan for a while now, yet haven't been able to follow through on it (obviously) and feel completely isolated. There's way more to my depression and despair but this is one aspect of it, one that has been puzzling and that I keep to myself.

 

[mia.wallace]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. You shouldn't feel like it's superficial or trivial to discuss. Hair loss can truly be psychologically detrimental, especially when it disrupts your daily life and sense of self. I won't delve too much into my own story, but I can sympathize. I've experienced physical changes within the last couple years with no medical explanation yet, that have made me full of despair and unable to engage in life as I used to. The stress from this has caused significant hair loss (nearly 3/4 of my beautiful long hair).
Something you might want to look into if you haven't are hair toppers, which are much more comfortable than wigs, clip onto the top of your head, and are game changers for ladies with hair loss. There are even companies like Lauren Ashtyn in the US that travel to major cities during the year and fit women into custom hair toppers, or you can order off their website. Check out their Instagram if of interest. A family member who never regained her hair from chemo wears one, and it looks amazing. Im sure there are other companies with similar products too. I know it's not the equivalent to having your own hair back, but while you figure out the cause of the hair shedding and potential treatments, it might help to get a bit of normalcy back and make you more comfortable in public.
As for supplements and treatments, I would recommend trying Viviscal and/or going to a dermatologist or plastic surgeon for PRP (platelet-rich plasma) injections. Both have shown great results xx

 

[Going]

I will never fully understand what you feel, since I am not you, but I also suffer from hair loss. Male pattern baldness, very early (ever since I was 14) and I find it harder to look at myself in the mirror every day. I feel like the only reason my most recent "friend group" approached me at all is because my hair was pretty when they met me. I have an otherwise ugly face. And every day I feel a difference in how they treat me. They have also mocked my hair loss. I've played along, because it's all in good fun, right? I'm terrified of the wide grins on my peripheral vision, and the laughing I always hear from all around me.

 

[henry22]

I've hesitated to focus on this topic when posting on this site, as it seems superficial and I've not found people who I can relate to or who might understand what I'm going through right now. I've had a severe loss of hair in recent months, a process that started to occur in the last few years but became particularly acute in the last couple of months. Not only has the hair fallen out in chunks, but the color has darkened dramatically and the texture has changed. My soft blonde hair that once defined my look has now faded and become stringy, unhealthy and scary thin. I've worn extensions over the years to add volume and because my job focused on my appearance (I used to be in front of the camera as a broadcast journalist, I'm no longer doing that.) I'm unable to wear my hair down out of the house, instead keep it up to disguise the hair loss, and have even spent thousands of dollars on a new wig that finally arrived last week after months of waiting for it to be custom made. I've spent the last few days trying to adjust to the look and feel of the wig, but it's ugly and so artificial, I find it itchy, uncomfortable and it gives me a headache. The day I got it fitted and picked it up was traumatic as I can't believe my life has gotten to this point. I wish I could understand why this is happening to me, the doctor has only pointed to a vitamin D deficiency but that doesn't feel like a full explanation. It feels like I've lost a limb or that I've recently become deformed. I have zero confidence to embrace wearing wigs and don't know how to adopt that type of lifestyle, missing activities I used to enjoy like swimming…the list of limitations due to wigs is long to me... I wish someone I knew had this same problem so I could share my experience or find answers… the most I've been able to do is follow social media accounts of other women that highlight hair loss and wig wearing. My identity for so long was tied to my appearance and now I can barely look in the mirror, have lost hope and pretty much don't take care of myself or feel worthy. I'm essentially a hermit and don't leave my home, I don't socialize and work remotely so I'm not even communicating with people in a work place environment. I've been focused on a suicide plan for a while now, yet haven't been able to follow through on it (obviously) and feel completely isolated. There's way more to my depression and despair but this is one aspect of it, one that has been puzzling and that I keep to myself.

I feel you. You can check my previous posts. I'm a woman experiencing hair loss as well.

 

[msocks]

About 13 years ago I had really nice full 3b/c naturally curly shoulder length hair. I had FINALLY found a good regimen and products that worked for me a few years before. I honestly considered my hair my best physical feature. And then it started falling out. Fuck PCOS. I have hypothyroidism too but meds never helped this.

I would cry during every shower. Just sobbing and then I would feel silly and superficial. I eventually started wearing headscarves. The pretty bright scarves helped. It was definitely an adjustment period though.

I'm not sure why I was hesitant initially to try wigs. Was I afraid I was giving up or something? Hair loss products were expensive and not doing shit. Ditto for biotin and other supplements. I had a few surgeries and things got worse from the general anesthesia I'm assuming. My hair will seem to get a bit better and then nope falling out again. It's like a higher percentage than normal of my follicles are in exogen or whatever the final phase of hair growth is. I probably have half or less of what I had before.

A coworker started wearing one and I was like huh maybe there's nothing to be ashamed of here. My first one that I got was a more expensive one that my insurance covered. It had the monofilament top and it was so HOT. It was okay but eeeeeh it didn't feel like ME.

I experimented with different types. A salon away from my home offered 3 free ones for people with hair loss. I think I felt more comfortable going in because fuck it I probably was never going to see these people again so who cares? I went in when no other clients were there, we dug through a bunch of boxes to find some, and they cut and styled it while I was wearing them. I hadn't sat for a haircut for 6 years at that point. Seems like such a small thing but it was really nice.

Of course at first I was suuuuper worried about people knowing I was wearing them at first. I did stop caring after a while though.

I actually prefer the cheaper ones now. Human hair ones are $$$ and you still have to spend more time styling them every day. The synthetic fiber holds whatever shape it cools off in. No constant flat/curl ironing and such needed. I pay $25 to $45 for most of mine that are lace front synthetics. Variety of colors and styles for whatever matches my mood. Also cheaper than the price of a freaking haircut these days.

The stupid wig cap things are too tight and annoying, never stay on, and may have given me headaches so I don't use them. I just chop off my hair a few inches below my ears myself, tie my hair into mini pig tails and tuck them back where the nape is.

I have a big head so the most comfortable wigs I've had are Arda. I had to sew in extra combs for a better hold though. They're mostly cosplay wigs so they're roomier and have a good range of styles and they can be heat styled. Their wide range of colors are actually blends so even the bright colors don't look as "fake" and the fiber they use isn't shiny. I prefer a darker root style so I used alcohol markers to dye the roots brown on a crimson Jaguar wig.

I get most of my wigs from another site right now though because I haven't had the motivation or energy to style them. Bleh. After trimming the lace and tweezing/cutting a few hairs, I floof it up with hairspray. Then it's shake and go. Less effort getting ready is always a good thing.

It really gave me some of my confidence back. I get compliments on my hair a lot. Seems like no one knows it's a wig unless I tell them. I can feel pretty sometimes again. At least for a short amount of time.

Back when I actually got out to walk or when I was in the hospital, I'd just tie my hair back on both sides and wear a cotton bandana. I'm thinking about swimming again. I miss it too. I'm 41 and 430 pounds so yeah it's much better for my knees. I'll probably use a cap like I did a few years ago.

I'm sure I'll always be self-conscious about my hair loss. I still don't leave the house without covering it with something. The scarves and wigs are just my way of coping with it. I hope you find a way of coping too. There's others of us out here going through similar shit so you don't have to be alone.

Sorry for the rambling, I just started typing and boom wall o text. I have bipolar type 2 so the wig thing became an obsession during a slightly hypomanic period. Also maybe by altering them slightly myself by dyeing the roots or restyling they felt more like me???

 

[Going]

I've hesitated to focus on this topic when posting on this site, as it seems superficial and I've not found people who I can relate to or who might understand what I'm going through right now. I've had a severe loss of hair in recent months, a process that started to occur in the last few years but became particularly acute in the last couple of months. Not only has the hair fallen out in chunks, but the color has darkened dramatically and the texture has changed. My soft blonde hair that once defined my look has now faded and become stringy, unhealthy and scary thin. I've worn extensions over the years to add volume and because my job focused on my appearance (I used to be in front of the camera as a broadcast journalist, I'm no longer doing that.) I'm unable to wear my hair down out of the house, instead keep it up to disguise the hair loss, and have even spent thousands of dollars on a new wig that finally arrived last week after months of waiting for it to be custom made. I've spent the last few days trying to adjust to the look and feel of the wig, but it's ugly and so artificial, I find it itchy, uncomfortable and it gives me a headache. The day I got it fitted and picked it up was traumatic as I can't believe my life has gotten to this point. I wish I could understand why this is happening to me, the doctor has only pointed to a vitamin D deficiency but that doesn't feel like a full explanation. It feels like I've lost a limb or that I've recently become deformed. I have zero confidence to embrace wearing wigs and don't know how to adopt that type of lifestyle, missing activities I used to enjoy like swimming…the list of limitations due to wigs is long to me... I wish someone I knew had this same problem so I could share my experience or find answers… the most I've been able to do is follow social media accounts of other women that highlight hair loss and wig wearing. My identity for so long was tied to my appearance and now I can barely look in the mirror, have lost hope and pretty much don't take care of myself or feel worthy. I'm essentially a hermit and don't leave my home, I don't socialize and work remotely so I'm not even communicating with people in a work place environment. I've been focused on a suicide plan for a while now, yet haven't been able to follow through on it (obviously) and feel completely isolated. There's way more to my depression and despair but this is one aspect of it, one that has been puzzling and that I keep to myself.

I have noticed how I made my last post all about myself again. But I don't know how to give advice when I haven't been able to figure it out either. I hope you can make peace with your appearance, even if that involves ending your life.

 

[Darkover]

i hate these decaying machines i want to be made of titanium

 

[Supersadmommy90]

I've had hair loss for almost 10 years now, my first major loss happened at 24, Im 33 now. It's crazy to think of how many young women with current gorgeous 90s blowouts, have yet to go through this, but they will, just like we had to. Which helps when I see women with hair like I used to have- Statistic likelihood is that they won't get to keep it either. Not to be too much of an embittered witch about it, it's just facts. Relatively less people get to keep their hair than we realize. Having long flowing perfect hair, is most often, and for most people, temporary and something that is unique to being in your teens and early 20s, by age 30-35 definitely at least half of women have lost some of their hair. At the very least
My hair stagnated and wouldn't grow for the longest time, then it grew back in my late 20s, and now i'm back into another season of loss and poor growth after a few stressful years. It's like my hair will marginally improve and then a few stressful weeks go by, and I lose my gains. I miss having long full hair. Probably about 20% of my deprsssion is caused by hair loss, which is significant. But if the rest of life were okay I would better be able to put hair loss into perspective and not let it eat away at me because I would be distracted by the rest of my tolerable life. But since the rest of life isn't okay, and isn't tolerable, the hair loss is just another bad aspect on top of many other issues.

 

[ViscaBarca]

I was 16and I suffered from extreme hairloss to the point that the only way for me to hide it is to shampoo once in the morning everyday so that the hair gains more volume, density and becomes less thinner. It's a hassle and it's getting worse and worse that even this method starts to become ineffective, I fucking hate my life. My teenage was ruined by this, I'm not the same person I used to be, I just wish I could die but I don't have the freaking balls to do it. I'm waiting for summer so I can hyperventilate myself and then drown myself either in a pool or something similar