Venting Got too drunk last night

[mallows]

Got really drunk on the phone with a friend last night and apparently went on a long rant ( over a few hours ) about how shit my life has gotten and how if I had the chance I'd just ctb now and get out of it. I don't remember any of it, but I had it recounted to me when I woke up, and I feel awful that I put that onto him & I've apologized profusely. He says it's fine and that he was expecting it but I still can't help but feel awful for it. I know I started crying at some point ( woke up with my eyes feeling gross and tight ) but I don't know if HE knows that. He doesn't seem off-put by it at all, at least. I really don't want to lose him as a friend. He has no reason to be this kind to me, we met about a week ago ( also why I'm so mortified that he suddenly knows all of my deepest traumas and can recount them with scary accuracy even after drinking with me ) my eyes are defocusing I think thats a sign to stop typing

 

[AInilam]

I think you should trust your friend when he tells you that it's fine. Part of having someone in your life that you can trust and talk to is the fact that you can turn to them for support during hard-times, that is what makes a true friend. It's okay to be vulnerable sometimes, I think when we're drunk it's when we're being our most authenthic selves--and clearly you needed someone to talk to.

There's a lot of people I've known for only a short while--who've I've had a bit of heart to heart and vice versa. Some people don't need a reason, if they like you/find you interesting and you both click for them that is enough. I don't think he's going to use your trauma against you, I'm sorry if people have hurt you in the past to give you reason to suspect. If this does goes south--and he does use your trauma as ammo--than he is not a person worth crying over.

At the end of the day, please give yourself grace--you're only human, you were drunk and needed a friend.

 

[Sleeper System]

You found yourself in a moment where you needed someone and this person was there. Who knows what his/her intentions are. All you can do is hope you get an opportunity to be there for them and call it even.

Everyone uses everyone. It's your job to decide who to use and who you allow to use you.

 

[mallows]

I think you should trust your friend when he tells you that it's fine. Part of having someone in your life that you can trust and talk to is the fact that you can turn to them for support during hard-times, that is what makes a true friend. It's okay to be vulnerable sometimes, I think when we're drunk it's when we're being our most authenthic selves--and clearly you needed someone to talk to.

There's a lot of people I've known for only a short while--who've I've had a bit of heart to heart and vice versa. Some people don't need a reason, if they like you/find you interesting and you both click for them that is enough. I don't think he's going to use your trauma against you, I'm sorry if people have hurt you in the past to give you reason to suspect. If this does goes south--and he does use your trauma as ammo--than he is not a person worth crying over.

At the end of the day, please give yourself grace--you're only human, you were drunk and needed a friend.

This is incredibly sweet, and really does make me feel a lot better about it. Thank you <3

You found yourself in a moment where you needed someone and this person was there. Who knows what his/her intentions are. All you can do is hope you get an opportunity to be there for them and call it even.

Everyone uses everyone. It's your job to decide who to use and who you allow to use you.

Yes, hopefully he opens up to me but he has expressed before that he doesn't want me to deal with it. I hope he realizes I'm here to help someday.