Venting gonna kms out of envy

[rifle]

tw for ed

my sister has been steadily getting skinnier by the month, and in the same time I've been gaining at a crazy rate. I am seething with jealousy. it is not exactly directed at her, but god is it an ugly feeling.

there's nothing worse than seeing her starting to look like a supermodel with tiny chest, perfect waist and almost nonexistent stomach, while I've been blowing up like a whale. I don't even have to undress to be aware of it, I feel all this disgusting matter rubbing between my thighs, weigning on my chest, jiggling on my wrists and ankles. in some way the uncomfortableness of it is comforting, because I don't want to get used to it, don't want to accept this state of being as normal.

the thought of close death is the only thing that brings me peace in this mindstate. I will die disgusting and ugly creature, but at least I won't be forced to live as one anymore.

in some way I'm thankful for this disorder, because it makes everything so much easier. I refuse to burden the world with my inadequateness, and I'm unable to change it, so I just have to remove myself. no need for long philosophical pondering when it comes down to something as simple as that.

 

[No longer suicidal😁]

Is weight the only problem that brings you here? If so, then I suggest you reconsider your decision. I have been stress eating for longer than I can remember. However, I know for a fact that I can lose weight as I already did this before. It wasn't easy as I tend to eat a lot. Following a diet didn't work for me but exercising, walking mostly, did the job. Don't CTB unless you give it a serious shot.

 

[rifle]

Is weight the only problem that brings you here? If so, then I suggest you reconsider your decision. I have been stress eating for longer than I can imagine. However, I know for a fact that I can lose weight as I already did this before. It wasn't easy as I tend to eat a lot. Following a diet didn't work for me but exercising, walking mostly, did the job. Don't CTB unless you give it a serious shot.

yeah totally. after all, we live in a culture that encourages and approves of suicide so much that it is normal to consider it at slightest inconvenience. thanks, I'm cured of this crippling and debilitating mental illness

 

[FuneralCry]

Your wish to be free from everything is understandable as it really can be torture feeling trapped here and having to suffer. I personally see the thought of being gone from this hellish world as being something comforting, at least in my case it could be the only thing that's ever close to being a relief. But anyway, I wish you the best.

 

[Escapee]

Your wish to be free from everything is understandable as it really can be torture feeling trapped here and having to suffer. I personally see the thought of being gone from this hellish world as being something comforting, at least in my case it could be the only thing that's ever close to being a relief. But anyway, I wish you the best.

I think the problem is we know how to go and end our troubles but we don't know where we are going and what await us I can't simply trust death to give me the relief I am longing what if death is only a gate to something you know nothing about maybe something more terrifying

 

[BoomBang101]

It absolutely breaks my heart that widely normalized beauty standards cause people to hurt like this. I feel the exact same way when it comes to my height. Everyone around me are shooting up like sprouts lol. Here's a fuck you to the companies who profit off our insecurity and society that keeps it normal