gonna be my last attempt to reach out. i don't know how else to best express how vital it is to me other than just accepting they'd rather i die

[jamie_]

 

[Lost in a Dream]

Whoever your friend is, I hope your attempt to reach out to them does some good. I've thought about mailing a similar letter to a friend that I hurt by saying horrible things during a dark time in my life, but I wouldn't even know where to send it at this point.

Hopefully there's a chance for you to make things right with them, since you admitted in your letter that you said and did things you regret. Wishing you the best.

 

[Sibyl Vane]

I hope everything works out for you. But if it doesn't, try not to be so hard on yourself. You did your best by trying to reach out. Just keep in mind that you cannot control how or if the other person will respond, but you can control how you feel and react to it.

 

[jamie_]

you can control how you feel and react to it.

I don't really think I can just control how I feel and react about it tbh. That's why I'm writing in this first place really; if I could choose I would not bother feeling weighed down by these painful thoughts and not being able to express such to them. But yes I cannot control how or if they respond and I don't really expect much, I have been here before. I will less so be hard on myself but I don't think i'll be able to not feel hard about the situation.

 

[waitingforrest]

Being ghosted hurts like hell, you can't help but wonder what you did wrong everyday. I hope you get the closure you need to put all these unsaid feelings to rest.

 

[Sibyl Vane]

I don't really think I can just control how I feel and react about it tbh. That's why I'm writing in this first place really; if I could choose I would not bother feeling weighed down by these painful thoughts and not being able to express such to them. But yes I cannot control how or if they respond and I don't really expect much, I have been here before. I will less so be hard on myself but I don't think i'll be able to not feel hard about the situation.

I never said it was an easy thing to do. I think it's less about choice and more about understanding your feelings and perceiving that you cannot control everything, especially when we are talking about someone else. If your expectations are not that high, the fall cannot be that low, and realizing that you are the only one in power over yourself and how you feel and react to certain situations can help to further alleviate the fall, in my opinion.

 

[jamie_]

power over yourself and how you feel and react to certain situations

i agree that other people do not control the fate of my feelings and reactions but equally neither does that mean the power rests in me and my mindset, it is situations that cause things. and you dont always have the power to change them. i'm not necessarily going to feel worse i am aware nothing changes, but that's the point i am already at the bottom just clinging on.

Being ghosted hurts like hell, you can't help but wonder what you did wrong everyday. I hope you get the closure you need to put all these unsaid feelings to rest.

the worst thing that you can do to somebody imo. especially when it is out of nowhere, especially when it is someone where you would talk every single day and someone you believed cared for you

 

[Eternal🌈Rainbow]

the worst thing that you can do to somebody imo. especially when it is out of nowhere, especially when it is someone where you would talk every single day and someone you believed cared for you

I felt this so much.

I'm so sorry for you. I've read some of your posts, I know you're suffering so much. I am too. People, or "normal" people don't believe us when we say this will kill us. But it will.
Right now I'm about to have a full breakdown (crisis), once again, as I've been having almost daily for the past 6+ months.
This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me. In the past, I've had for months terrible generalised anxiety and even strong depressive symptoms. But NOTHING that I've ever experienced in my whole life resembles in the slightest to what I'm feeling and suffering right now, and have been since the end of last year 2021.

Again, I'm deeply sorry for you and what happened. I sincerely hope that person listens and talks to you, as you need and deserve.

Much love

 

[FuneralCry]

It sounds so painful what you are going through. I'm sorry that you have to endure so much suffering. I hope that there is a way for you to get the outcome that you want.

 

[jamie_]

but I wouldn't even know where to send it at this point.

Maybe you could find them on a social media, pass it on via someone in their life you can find. Maybe look them up in a person directory?

 

[Lost in a Dream]

Maybe you could find them on a social media, pass it on via someone in their life you can find. Maybe look them up in a person directory?

They will probably block me on social media. At least if I sent a letter in the mail, they could read it, without feeling obligated to respond. Finding someone we both know to be the middle man could work probably, but I'm not sure. Thanks for the suggestions.

 

[jamie_]

They will probably block me on social media

ah i see. i have the same problem. i sent that same OP image to a trusted mutual friend who passed it on. didn't change the result in the end but at least i have a comfort knowing that they looked at it even a brief second more than if a letter in the post got lost on the way and never really knowing if they saw it at all. have less anxiety about departing knowing that they didn't read it after seeing it rather than the chance they didn't read it because they were never aware of it... well that's if my trusted mutual actually is trusted and didn't lie about sending it but i'm trying to not listen to that side of my brain