hoppybunny
Fearer of the Future
- Jun 26, 2024
- 41
So, sometimes I really think God wants me to kill myself because everytime I make the resolve to improve my life I get hit with major backlash.
My sister is moving out and so I thought I'd finally have my own room. I had my own room last year but it was in my dorms and at that point I was really hating that school so I quit. Also I hated the moving process every year.
My mother decided she wanted to move me into the guest room so my little brother can have his own room. And apparently my opinion means Jack shit cause she did not give a fuck when I told her I have no interest in moving there.
The reason I'm so against moving down there is because it's too close.to my parents room. I hate being near them. They're loud and have no sense of privacy plus we use the guest room closet as a storage room so I know people are just going to come in whenever they want to get stuff and that sucks. My old room is fine and I have to leave and it's so unfair. I felt so invisible, my mum was just making decisions for me and ignoring everything. She's going to buy a new table even though mine works just fine because she thinks it will be better for me but I have no interest in adding more to my things. I just want to have as little as possible. And I already feel miserable being close to them now she's spending unnecessary money on me and making me feel like shit.
As I said before I'm giving living a shot now cause I'm too scared to die so I've decided to give myself 2 years to move out.
So by October 2026 I want to be out of my parents house. I'll have to get a job and work which sucks but it's the only way I can be sure that I'm capable of living. I just want to try working and being independent for three years and I'll see if I should kill myself then.
But yeah so my goals for this year is
Find where I want to live
Make a move out budget
Find a remote job to do alongside school or freelance
And um get a car maybe (my parents will probably get me one) but I'll buy a new one upon moving out so my brother can have it. Most likely a Miata since they're cute.
My sister is moving out and so I thought I'd finally have my own room. I had my own room last year but it was in my dorms and at that point I was really hating that school so I quit. Also I hated the moving process every year.
My mother decided she wanted to move me into the guest room so my little brother can have his own room. And apparently my opinion means Jack shit cause she did not give a fuck when I told her I have no interest in moving there.
The reason I'm so against moving down there is because it's too close.to my parents room. I hate being near them. They're loud and have no sense of privacy plus we use the guest room closet as a storage room so I know people are just going to come in whenever they want to get stuff and that sucks. My old room is fine and I have to leave and it's so unfair. I felt so invisible, my mum was just making decisions for me and ignoring everything. She's going to buy a new table even though mine works just fine because she thinks it will be better for me but I have no interest in adding more to my things. I just want to have as little as possible. And I already feel miserable being close to them now she's spending unnecessary money on me and making me feel like shit.
As I said before I'm giving living a shot now cause I'm too scared to die so I've decided to give myself 2 years to move out.
So by October 2026 I want to be out of my parents house. I'll have to get a job and work which sucks but it's the only way I can be sure that I'm capable of living. I just want to try working and being independent for three years and I'll see if I should kill myself then.
But yeah so my goals for this year is
Find where I want to live
Make a move out budget
Find a remote job to do alongside school or freelance
And um get a car maybe (my parents will probably get me one) but I'll buy a new one upon moving out so my brother can have it. Most likely a Miata since they're cute.
