Gave life another shot. I’m back, and ready to go now.

[Ready2GoNow]

Hey everyone. It's almost been a year since my last suicide attempt. The only reason it didn't work is because I was stupid enough to do it in the company of someone. I know... But I didn't want to die alone. After a week in the ICU I somehow had a change of heart (trust me it had nothing to do with the staff who treated me terribly), and decided to give life one last shot.

Well, here I am again. I've ordered SN and I'm 100% ready to go as soon as it arrives. Life isn't for me, it never was and it's futile to fight it. I'm completely alone in this world. No family, no friends, I have no one. And I mean LITERALLY no one. If I wanted to pick up the phone right now and text/call someone, there is no one I could contact. What a sad existence. Between the crippling loneliness, chronic health issues, CPTSD from horrific child abuse, and life kicking me down in general, I'm confident it's my time now. I tried my best but this world rejected me like a bad organ transplant. I wish I hadn't bothered trying.

As soon as my SN arrives I'll be checking into a hotel room and leaving this disgusting world the same way I lived in it. Alone.

My only regret is that I didn't get to fulfill my one mission: to make a difference in people's lives. On the bright side no one will give a fuck that I'm gone. No one will cry, be traumatised, or generally give a fuck. As much as that hurts me, at least it's better than hurting others I guess.

Fuck you world. It's your loss.

I just hope there isn't an afterlife because I've suffered enough. I hope it's just like being asleep.

 

[BetterInthanOut]

If your regret is that you didn't make a difference in people's lives then all you have to do is reply to a couple threads here- lots of people post just wanting to be heard by someone, every reply makes a difference. I'm really sorry that life has brought you back here, it sounds like you've been through a lot. If you want to chat through anything my DMs are open, good luck with whatever you choose

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

My only regret is that I didn't get to fulfill my one mission: to make a difference in people's lives. On the bright side no one will give a fuck that I'm gone. No one will cry, be traumatised, or generally give a fuck.

I feel this so strongly. I feel like I didn't fulfill my purpose. I could've done so much more. But in the time that I was here, I did make a difference, and now there are people who will be saddened by my passing, and that's so difficult to deal with. It's a double-edged sword.

If your regret is that you didn't make a difference in people's lives then all you have to do is reply to a couple threads here- lots of people post just wanting to be heard by someone, every reply makes a difference.

I think that's so true! What a way to make a difference before you go. You'll be very valued here, and we will miss you and mourn you.

 

[SipSop]

Hey everyone. It's almost been a year since my last suicide attempt. The only reason it didn't work is because I was stupid enough to do it in the company of someone. I know... But I didn't want to die alone. After a week in the ICU I somehow had a change of heart (trust me it had nothing to do with the staff who treated me terribly), and decided to give life one last shot.

Well, here I am again. I've ordered SN and I'm 100% ready to go as soon as it arrives. Life isn't for me, it never was and it's futile to fight it. I'm completely alone in this world. No family, no friends, I have no one. And I mean LITERALLY no one. If I wanted to pick up the phone right now and text/call someone, there is no one I could contact. What a sad existence. Between the crippling loneliness, chronic health issues, CPTSD from horrific child abuse, and life kicking me down in general, I'm confident it's my time now. I tried my best but this world rejected me like a bad organ transplant. I wish I hadn't bothered trying.

As soon as my SN arrives I'll be checking into a hotel room and leaving this disgusting world the same way I lived in it. Alone.

My only regret is that I didn't get to fulfill my one mission: to make a difference in people's lives. On the bright side no one will give a fuck that I'm gone. No one will cry, be traumatised, or generally give a fuck. As much as that hurts me, at least it's better than hurting others I guess.

Fuck you world. It's your loss.

I just hope there isn't an afterlife because I've suffered enough. I hope it's just like being asleep.

Get it out my friend. I use this place to vent too when I am on the edge, now is your turn.
I know how you feel. I am in a similar boat. People take for granted things that they have that makes them connect with others and rise in society and have a fulfilling life. But for us... what is there for us? Emotional pain and indiference.
I wish it wasn't like this. But it is.
Take care of you.

 

[Deathbydemo]

Fuck you, world. Your unimaginable pain and suffering has cost us our lives.

I'm so sorry you're alone in this life. I can't imagine how painful that must be to live with every day. Loneliness and solitude are soul crushing.Vent anything you want to out here. We are listening and we understand your pain.

 

[woxihuanni]

I tried my best but this world rejected me like a bad organ transplant. I wish I hadn't bothered trying.

I just hope there isn't an afterlife because I've suffered enough. I hope it's just like being asleep.

You spoke my mind. I wish you peace

 

[blickcity]

Hoping you find peace brother

 

[Ready2GoNow]

Thank you so much everyone for your kindness. I'm not ashamed to admit it made me cry. had forgotten how it felt to be accepted and understood.

You'll be very valued here, and we will miss you and mourn you.

Thank you for this. It really hurts to know no one in this world will even notice I'm gone, let alone care. To be told that someone out there, even just a stranger on the Internet, would miss/mourn me means so much to me

 

[Sinkinshyp]

as mentioned you can reply to a few threads and make some difference for someone. You could have used your last attempt to help folks find a way to go on if things had gotten better for you. I'm so sorry you have no one if it matters any, I'm new here and I can see so many here are there for you. You will be missed.

 

[Deathbydemo]

Get it out my friend. I use this place to vent too when I am on the edge, now is your turn.
I know how you feel. I am in a similar boat. People take for granted things that they have that makes them connect with others and rise in society and have a fulfilling life. But for us... what is there for us? Emotional pain and indiference.
I wish it wasn't like this. But it is.
Take care of you.

Bless this answer! I'm not religious, but this response is just so nice it almost hurts.

 

[TAW122]

I'm sorry to hear about all the abuse and horror that you have suffered in this world. I hope you are able to find the long awaited peace you are seeking.

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

i'm sorry life has pushed you to this point. the world is such a cruel place. i'm hoping you find the peace you deserve.

 

[SunnyPotato]

You are valued here, and just posting this could make a difference/help others feel less alone. I'm sorry the world has been so terrible to you, you deserved better. I hope you find peace.