![Darkover](/data/avatars/l/29/29962.jpg?1644075698)
Darkover
Angelic
- Jul 29, 2021
- 4,225
I hate the world. I hate the fact that I exist. People are worthless sacks of shit, nobody fucking cares until you're dead. It's the fucking harsh and sad reality of life. You don't believe me? Just wait and see. The moment I pass all my social medias will be flooded with an influx of people saying "I can't believe he's dead", "I'm so sad", "I wish I talked to him more", while deep down inside these same people never cared for me. They never once spoke to me, they never even once asked me how I was, they never even gave me the fucking time of day. They would just treat me like I don't fucking matter or like I don't fucking exist. The hypocrisy of these people saying shit like "I wish I talked to him more", yeah well too fucking late. And that's the problem no body gives a fuck about you until you're dead, the moment that you are a lifeless carcass completely devoid of any life or any semblance of feeling anymore is when people start to feign this false caring for you. I see people act all high and mighty putting on this false persona with a facade of caring while deep inside they are just numb and cold and unsympathetic.
What is the point of me existing then? I don't really have any friends, I don't have a fulfilling life, I'm 38 in a few weeks and I feel like my existence is fucking pathetic. I am fed up of working my shitty dead end retail job that I somehow can't get out of, I'm lonely 24/7, I don't have anyone I can go and hang out with because everyone is super fucking busy all the time and never makes me a priority in their life. I don't have a girlfriend and I doubt I ever will, I'm a disgusting overweight slob who spends most of his time sleeping, eating, drinking and taking Benadryl. I want to be free of my pain but I'm too much of a fucking chickenshit to kill myself. Instead sleep is the only solace I really get, it's the closest thing I can be to being dead without actually killing myself.
I've got nothing to really live for, as I've gotten older all I've faced is nothing but pain. Years of bullying, rejection, trauma and mental anguish have pushed me to the brink of insanity. I have lost my fucking mind. I don't know who I am anymore. I'm tired of being alone all the time, I'm tired of being forced to face my thoughts alone, I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I want off of this fucking planet. It's not fair, why am I being forced to suffer so much? I scream and cry for help but no one listens or even gives a shit, they're all too busy living their fucking insignificant little lives. What about me? WHAT ABOUT ME? IS THERE ANYONE ON THIS GODDAMN PLANET WHO EVEN CARES ENOUGH ABOUT ME TO REACH OUT TO ME? WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU YOU SHITHEADS?
What is the point of me existing then? I don't really have any friends, I don't have a fulfilling life, I'm 38 in a few weeks and I feel like my existence is fucking pathetic. I am fed up of working my shitty dead end retail job that I somehow can't get out of, I'm lonely 24/7, I don't have anyone I can go and hang out with because everyone is super fucking busy all the time and never makes me a priority in their life. I don't have a girlfriend and I doubt I ever will, I'm a disgusting overweight slob who spends most of his time sleeping, eating, drinking and taking Benadryl. I want to be free of my pain but I'm too much of a fucking chickenshit to kill myself. Instead sleep is the only solace I really get, it's the closest thing I can be to being dead without actually killing myself.
I've got nothing to really live for, as I've gotten older all I've faced is nothing but pain. Years of bullying, rejection, trauma and mental anguish have pushed me to the brink of insanity. I have lost my fucking mind. I don't know who I am anymore. I'm tired of being alone all the time, I'm tired of being forced to face my thoughts alone, I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I want off of this fucking planet. It's not fair, why am I being forced to suffer so much? I scream and cry for help but no one listens or even gives a shit, they're all too busy living their fucking insignificant little lives. What about me? WHAT ABOUT ME? IS THERE ANYONE ON THIS GODDAMN PLANET WHO EVEN CARES ENOUGH ABOUT ME TO REACH OUT TO ME? WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU YOU SHITHEADS?