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jajajamielee

jajajamielee

worthless
Oct 11, 2023
196
I lowkey forgot my username but anyways hi chat it's me. the bitch who whines about their family 😀

so my grandma started hallucinating and was just staring at me all creepy like for two minutes straight
she thought I was hiding something that she hallucinated and thought it was under my shirt so she started trying to look under my shirt and it made me really uncomfortable
I tend to laugh when I'm uncomfortable so I was laughing while saying no while she kept trying to look under my shirt so she didn't take me seriously and kept touching me
then she went back out to the kitchen and continued to stare at me through the glass door for several more minutes
I messaged my dad to tell him to distract her because I was really uncomfortable with all the staring and weird smiling and her not listening to me saying no but he just ignored it
eventually she went back to her room and I went out to ask my dad why he didn't do anything and he just shifted the blame to me
so now I'm worried about sleeping because I know she's hallucinating and I feel like she may try to look for the thing that literally doesn't exist and might come into my room while I'm sleeping to do it or maybe she'll hallucinate something worse

for obvious reasons I already don't like when family members touch me
friends i have no problem with
even my aunts? sure occasionally
but immediate family? oh hell no
so her doing it when I kept saying no and even trying to look under my shirt is a fucking hell no
and if I were to even being it up people are gonna be like "she didn't mean it in that way how dare you think of your grandmother like that"
hey. hey guys. this is the same woman who i had to fight with to get her to stop smacking my ass randomly
and my family members CLEARLY have no issues thinking about me like that
they've proven that on numerous occasions
like my dad insisting I'm a sex worker because I just wear sports bras and shorts when it's hot
how dare I
or them insisting I'm doing you know what when I'm in the shower too long
oh they also would constantly barge in on me in the shower for zero reason even up to the age of like fucking 15
my dad always barged into my room when he knew very well I was changing because I didn't hear him mumble my name from the other fucking room through a closed door 💔
still did it when I was 19 btw ✌️
like holy hell gang
my family clearly thinks about me like that
like bro privacy is something I have to earn in this house, that's not something implied
I was told straight up that I have to earn the right to have privacy, point blank period
hell my dad used to slam my door open as hard as he could with the express purpose of breaking the hinge so I couldn't close my door
all this and people would deeeeefinitely berate me for bringing up my grandma trying to look up my shirt

LIKE UM CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW NOBODY TAKES ME SERIOUSLY

THEY KNOW DAMN WELL I HAVE PTSD RELATING TO BEING RAPED SO UMMMM HEY MAYBE DON'T TOUCH ME UNLESS I SAY YOU CAN?

I'M GONNA JUMP MAN TRUST I'M GONNA JUMP I'LL DO A FUCKING CANNONBALL TOO LOL

fuck my life i hate this shit
 

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