Help Friends abandoning you over attempted suicide

[Leigh Under Clouds]

Recently, I attempted suicide and survived.
Most things went as I expected with my group of friends, they wished me well and came to talk to me once I returned from the hospital. But one of them reprimanded me, acting coldly towards the fact that I nearly ended my own life, and one of them outright blocked me. Deeming me an unstable person who they didn't want to be associated with any longer for their own sake. This made me feel incredibly isolated and hurt, I could rationalise the person who blocked me, but I can't help but feel I'm being mistreated by the first. I was always there for them when they needed me, and now they're abandoning me at my absolute lowest point, calling my attempt nothing more than a "stunt".
I really cannot tell if I'm in the wrong or in the right about this. Is it genuinely okay to cut people out of your life because they are suicidal?

 

[CloudyNight]

its horrible that your friends left you during your time of need but they aren't therapists they probably don't even know what to do in that situation but run away from it but now you know who your friends where and when times got hard they ran don't worry you'll find someone that will stick it through with you you where not in the wrong here

 

[heavyeyes]

I experienced something similar in the past. I'm so sorry your friends left you. You're not in the wrong here at all. That was a really shitty thing they did and they don't sound like very good friends at all. It's definitely not ok to cut people out of your life because they're suicidal but sometimes people run away from situations they don't understand. This has everything to do with them and nothing do to with you.

 

[epic]

"Hard times reveal true friends"
Good riddance I say.

Is it genuinely okay to cut people out of your life because they are suicidal?

It's not .

I could rationalise the person who blocked me.

This person is even worse . His decision was not based on a misplaced personal belief about suicide, it was based on a "use and throw" type of thinking. He hung around when the times were good and the dopamine hits kept coming . As soon as he saw distress , he surgically cut you off. I won't be surprised if he is a sociopath .

 

[depressedlover]

I experienced the same with my only two friends,the only ones i have had in my life,to top it up they left me without being considerate of my feelings.I had lost my love,so i was grieving and in immense pain,that's why attempted without proper research and i failed.It's been two months after my attempt and they've never checked up on me,one recently texted to ask for a favor from me even without asking how i was doing.
I think it's a normal thing nowadays,the world we are living in.
Having posted this in the recovery section,it means you are on your way to recovery,take it as blessing because not only did you realize who your friends were but got rid of the fake ones'the users' .It gives you an opportunity to know who you can count on as you begin your recovery,it'll prevent you from getting disappointed due to unfulfilled expectations from worthless beings.
I wish you all the best in your recovery,fuck fake friendship.

 

[tatteredbone]

I have to admit, I've been in your situation countless times and it hurts. But in the end, the best advice I can give is the fault is their own.

You can't control your tendencies and them taking the nuclear option is unfair.
But I also recommend for any new friends you make to try your best to warn them about your health and history.

calling my attempt nothing more than a "stunt".

As for this, god I could sing the number of times I heard this slung my direction, It's so common for non-suicidal people or just mentally stable individuals to not understand how difficult the process truly is and how much more difficult the post-survival process can be. You're strong and don't let those people drag you down. If you ever need a friend I'm sure countless people here and myself will be here for you.

It hurts to see someone go through such a similar scenario to my own, so if you ever need support, feel free to instant message me or reply to anything by me asking.

 

[epic]

@tatteredbone @depressedlover WTF . I hope you have moved on from those "friends" .

 

[tatteredbone]

@tatteredbone @depressedlover WTF . I hope you have moved on from those "friends" .

I've moved away from them luckily and have a circle of supportive friends, who are very open about allowing me to go to them whenever I'm troubled. I wish more people to get lucky like this and find sweet people. Thank you for your condolences genuinely.

 

[depressedlover]

@tatteredbone @depressedlover WTF . I hope you have moved on from those "friends" .

I had no choice but to move on.I'm now alone having lost my love who was also a confidant,solace and comfort.I still turn to him for comfort even though he is the one i grieve.It hurts but hopefully it'll end soon.

 

[macrocosm]

Recently, I attempted suicide and survived.
Most things went as I expected with my group of friends, they wished me well and came to talk to me once I returned from the hospital. But one of them reprimanded me, acting coldly towards the fact that I nearly ended my own life, and one of them outright blocked me. Deeming me an unstable person who they didn't want to be associated with any longer for their own sake. This made me feel incredibly isolated and hurt, I could rationalise the person who blocked me, but I can't help but feel I'm being mistreated by the first. I was always there for them when they needed me, and now they're abandoning me at my absolute lowest point, calling my attempt nothing more than a "stunt".
I really cannot tell if I'm in the wrong or in the right about this. Is it genuinely okay to cut people out of your life because they are suicidal?

It would be great to have support, but we can't expect most people to be ok with supporting us with suicide. It's a hard and sensitive subject for most people. Friends or siblings or parents or anyone, it's a very hard thing for them to understand or support.

Sucks but that's just the reality of life

 

[Catastrofe]

Being suicidal is something more common than society wants to admit, but still it is a very peculiar feeling, expecially when it is acrive and not passive : it is impossible to relate with being suicidal if you were not there. There are some open minded people that try to support even when they do not understand.

Also, I would add there is a underlieing fear. Some people that are alive and committed to life do not want to deal with suicidal people because, deep inside, it reminds them it can happen to everyone (them included), that life can turn you upside down in a second with no reason or with no fairness, and that if they are not suicidal it does not mean they are better than others.

That said, it does not mean your "friends" have the right to be assholes. Their acts and words would have hurted anyone, I am very sorry it happened to you.

 

[TowerRoad]

Recently, I attempted suicide and survived.
Most things went as I expected with my group of friends, they wished me well and came to talk to me once I returned from the hospital. But one of them reprimanded me, acting coldly towards the fact that I nearly ended my own life, and one of them outright blocked me. Deeming me an unstable person who they didn't want to be associated with any longer for their own sake. This made me feel incredibly isolated and hurt, I could rationalise the person who blocked me, but I can't help but feel I'm being mistreated by the first. I was always there for them when they needed me, and now they're abandoning me at my absolute lowest point, calling my attempt nothing more than a "stunt".
I really cannot tell if I'm in the wrong or in the right about this. Is it genuinely okay to cut people out of your life because they are suicidal?

I don't know what kind of person you are. But reading your post I would have never done that to you. I would have never leave you alone after your suicide attempt. But I don't know you personally. Sending you love from here.

 

[hiki-loser]

calling my attempt nothing more than a "stunt".

You aren't in the wrong. This is a horrific thing to say and do to someone who attempted suicide. I'm so sorry they reacted that way to you.
I don't know you or them and I don't want to feed in to an echo chamber so for a measure of balance I'll say I'm sure potentially losing you shook them up a lot and they're processing it in a weird way? Regardless it's not cool. I hope your other friends support your recovery.

 

[StolenLife]

Something similar happened to me when I revealed my past and my suicidal thoughts to my so called "friend". Ever since then she started avoiding me and never acted the same way again. OP, those two were never your true friends in the first place. I know it hurts, but let them go. Why would you want such toxic people near yourself, anyway? The older I get the more I realize that we are all alone in the end and friendships are mostly made out of convenience for selfish reasons such as status and money.

 

[Leigh Under Clouds]

"Hard times reveal true friends"
Good riddance I say.

It's not .

This person is even worse . His decision was not based on a misplaced personal belief about suicide, it was based on a "use and throw" type of thinking. He hung around when the times were good and the dopamine hits kept coming . As soon as he saw distress , he surgically cut you off. I won't be surprised if he is a sociopath .

You're probably right. I likely wont be accepting them into my life again even if they do come around again at some point like they mentioned. Thank you.

I have to admit, I've been in your situation countless times and it hurts. But in the end, the best advice I can give is the fault is their own.

You can't control your tendencies and them taking the nuclear option is unfair.
But I also recommend for any new friends you make to try your best to warn them about your health and history.

As for this, god I could sing the number of times I heard this slung my direction, It's so common for non-suicidal people or just mentally stable individuals to not understand how difficult the process truly is and how much more difficult the post-survival process can be. You're strong and don't let those people drag you down. If you ever need a friend I'm sure countless people here and myself will be here for you.

It hurts to see someone go through such a similar scenario to my own, so if you ever need support, feel free to instant message me or reply to anything by me asking.

This speaks to me. I really empathize with you, and I am sorry you had to suffer through the same feeling of isolation when companionship is what you need the most.
I had never imagined that even close friends could abandon you in times like this, it's shocking. I hope you have been well.

 

[ever so lonely]

may i make a point op ? please ?, might i suggest you find new friends please, think of it as trial and error, any friend that abandons you at your lowest was never a true friend to begin with, i have had to cut off a heck of a lot of people since covid and lockdowns myself, as i realised most my pals were takers, ok when i am there for them but not so much when i need them there for me, i think your worth way more than what these so called friends offered you, you deserve far better than to be abandoned at your most vulnerable, may i also bluntly state fuck these people, even if i dont know them from adam, they say you know who your true friends are during a crisis situation, i think you need to abandon THEM, and find yourself a new support network, i know it is easier said than done, but havnt they showed there true colours by leaving you high and dry when you needed them most ?, you dont need such people op, i am sorry you have had to endure this, people are very fickle creatures, i learned this the hard way myself, maybe if you can begin anew start afresh, and vow to yourself to NEVER let this happen again, they are not friends at least it doesnt sound like it, hope you didnt mind me saying so, granted i dont know them, but they sound awful, untrustworthy/unreliable, definitely grounds for cutting your losses and moving on ❤, peace out, i wish you better friends op.

 

[tsykoais]

But one of them reprimanded me, acting coldly towards the fact that I nearly ended my own life, and one of them outright blocked me. Deeming me an unstable person who they didn't want to be associated with any longer for their own sake.

these are not your friends, period.

 

[nozomu]

This has been happening to me too since I started being open about suicidality. Many consider suicidal people not worth knowing. It is sad.