Venting Feeling like I'm retarded because I'm terrible at video games, especially multiplayer ones.

[ConfusedHurting2632]

To be fair I suck at just about everything I do when compared to other people. Not just video games. At school I was always terrible at absolutely all sports, in art class my drawings were dog shit compared to that of my peers, I always lost at board games, my grades were also garbage, etc. But with video games it's more apparent because I don't even have to go out of the house or anything. It takes no less than 5 seconds to just log in and begin losing to every single player out there to see how much I suck. For every 1 match I win, I no joke, lose about 99.

If specifics matter, the main games I have in mind are Smash Bros and Pokémon. But I suck at absolutely all video games.

I used to have massive mental breakdowns about how much I lost at video games when I was younger. And by "younger" I mean I'm 20 now but as soon as even 1 year ago, though my mental breakdowns over this used to be especially bad at age 17. I used to make several depressed/suicidal posts on Reddit on video games subs, which everyone just insulted me over and accused me of being a pity-party instead of being willing to improve, which didn't help.

Now I'm able to "keep my cool" per se. Even when I'm losing extremely bad, which is almost always, I just calmly look at the screen without much reaction, and just stop playing when I get bored. So no more mental breakdowns, thankfully. Partly because I've stopped caring, and can see that losing at a video game is not the end of the world. Though I'd be lying if I said it didn't still bother me at least a little bit, otherwise why would I be writing a post like this?

I'm even terrible at single player games, but at multiplayer games where I'm directly comparing myself to other players it's even worse. In general anything where I'd compare myself to my peers made me feel bad, though with video games it's just the easiest activity to do it in.

In general though I always seemed to struggle with a LOT of stuff my peers found easy. Or to struggle with practically EVERYTHING.

"Retarded" is a strong word because someone who was truly mentally retarded would very unlikely know that they are, and such a person would likely rarely ever self-reflect deeply like this, and be aware of all their flaws and wrongdoings...so I'm probably just using it as a hyperbole. But at best I know I'm probably not very smart. And at worst I'm just barely able to function.

I'm 20 and my life isn't looking too great, though of course there's plenty of time to change. I graduated high school at age 18, and in those 2 years since have basically just been working on my mental health. But I never got my driver's license and don't really ever plan to because of suicide risk. I also have never had a job in my life. I also don't have any friends, and never really had much friends, and the ones I did were more-so acquaintances. And I lost those old friends because of stupid stuff that I did while on a bad mental health medication that made me act crazy.

But basically I'm 20 years old and jobless, don't go to school, and don't have a license. Knowing the greater context of my life and my mental health struggles maybe that's not such a big deal, but on paper it's kind of a red flag/sign I'll be a bum for life if I don't change something soon. I could blame my parents all I want for this, and maybe they did have something to do with it, but you know the saying, you can take a horse to the water but you can't make the horse drink it. I never really made a huge effort to improve my life ever since I was a little kid in Kindergarten, age 6. My parents could give me the tools to succeed but if I refuse to use them then there's not much that can be done.

And wow...this went from video games to basically a reflection of my whole life and where it's currently at, lol. I guess the video games themselves aren't the main issue, just the surface issue, and there are a lot deeper underlying issues underneath that.

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

Play Foxhole, being retarded and pulling pro tenno heika banzai moves, especially if it has nearly no odds of achieving anything, will just get you praise.

 

[ConfusedHurting2632]

Play Foxhole, being retarded and pulling pro tenno heika banzai moves, especially if it has nearly no odds of achieving anything, will just get you praise.

Thank you for the suggestion! I shall consider playing Foxhole, then. Praise is very nice.

 

[Achlys]

Have you considered playing games that lack competition? Such as Stardew Valley. Sure, there might be some that take such games to their extremes and speedrun them, but that is a very niche subset of their respective communities.

 

[Smart No More]

Day Z is a great multiplayer game with different servers for your preferences. PVP will be challenging. PVE will be too but it's much slower paced and the chances of being sniped are much lower as you're only up against the environment.


Being bad at online multiplayer is nothing to be worried about. There's more than just skill to consider. Your internet connection can trip you and so can the measure put in place by developers to counteract lag. You might actually be better than you think.


I've become sick in a way that impacts my gaming ability. I can recommend some single player games that arw rewarding and enjoyable but slow paced and not to demanding. My first would be shadow of the colossus. I love thst game and it can be set to easy. open world exploration games are great if you like to kind of do your own thing and play at your own pace. Do it for fun. Don't beat yourself up. On that note, steer clear of fighting games lol. Even some you might assume would be easy will kick your ass fast. Smash Bros is the perfect example. It's player base is fanatic and there's a certain way to play that game. If you do it any other way then it's KO lol. Kind of like Street Fighter. If you really want to continue with Smash bros check some YouTube vids on how to play. It makes things clearer.

Some FPS games with single player campaigns can be quite easy. I mean you can set them to easy too. Again, don't beat yourself up for doing this.

Then there are roleplay adventure games. A retro game comes to mind - Eartbound. It's a little undulating story of a game that will twist your brain, make you chuckle and probably challenge you but it's turn based where the combat comes in so most of the time you can do it at your own pace. Though there is the odd time constraint involved. TBF if you're pkaying pokemon games it'll be familiar.

 

[Al_stargate]

Don't base your self-worth on video games but rather on real-life achievements. I play this video game like 2 hours a day almost every day since recently, and most of the times I get killed off fairly soon, so most of it is just luck. These streamers are mostly cheaters.

 

[Smart No More]

Don't base your self-worth on video games but rather on real-life achievements. I play this video game like 2 hours a day almost every day since recently, and most of the times I get killed off fairly soon, so most of it is just luck. These streamers are mostly cheaters.

What do you play, do you mind me asking? No pressure obviously!

 

[whatevs]

You got dealt a shit hand but 20 yo is a good starting point to start a serious uphill battle. I was also inferior in most games, and in most things, but I discovered a few things I was better at than others. In the end my defects were too grave for me to have a successful life but I tried. You might have a better run.

One tip is to focus on what you like, and go from there. You will get better at stuff you enjoy, it's a no brainer. I became quite good at some solitary games like Thief or Fallout, I could feel the dexterity. I've always tended to crumble under the pressure of competition, perhaps skills or jobs where you do things alone will yield a better result.

 

[Julgran]

It takes no less than 5 seconds to just log in and begin losing to every single player out there to see how much I suck. For every 1 match I win, I no joke, lose about 99.

If specifics matter, the main games I have in mind are Smash Bros and Pokémon. But I suck at absolutely all video games.

As an old gamer myself, I recognize the difficulty of becoming good at modern games. In the oldendays, there were games such as Quake and Starcraft, which demanded some kind of skill level - of course - but if I'm not mistaken, most modern games - like League of Legends, Call of Duty and World of Warcraft - have a built-in skill or level system, which means that players will need to keep playing and keep up with the levelling up of other players in order to be able to compete, or else they won't have the game functions - such as upgraded weapons - necessary to put up a fight against other players - this is in contrast to old games - such as Quake - in which you could just launch the server browser, join a server, have fun and then repeat the same thing as many times as you wanted.

A few years ago, I played a few rounds of Counter-Strike against my two nephews.... guess who won! Not me, and they were 10 and 12 years old, while I was 30

 

[JakeFlake]

Perhaps entertain yourself via Netflix instead?

 

[Al_stargate]

What do you play, do you mind me asking? No pressure obviously!

Warzone, you?

 

[Smart No More]

Warzone, you?

Ah, I've not played that yet. I've been having problems gaming lately but do log into Day Z now and then. I was quite into it before I got so sick.

I've actually just downloaded the remastered version of Modern Warfare for a little nostalgia but I always really loved Battlefield. Mainly Bad Company2 and 3 I think. They were great multiplayer games. It's lost it's direction a bit in more modern itterations.

Been meaning to jump back into Death Stranding too. There's a list of games I've fallen behind with. Ark is pretty good. Hard. But good when you get the hang of it. It's work though lol.

 

[Al_stargate]

Ah, I've not played that yet. I've been having problems gaming lately but do log into Day Z now and then. I was quite into it before I got so sick.

I've actually just downloaded the remastered version of Modern Warfare for a little nostalgia but I always really loved Battlefield. Mainly Bad Company2 and 3 I think. They were great multiplayer games. It's lost it direction a bit in more modern itterations.

I've seen DayZ on youtube. I haven't even played video games till 5 months ago, except for occasional CS:GO and Warzone. Previous Battlefields are probably best shooters ever, not sure about new one. But haven't got much experience with Battlefield myself.

 

[Smart No More]

I've seen DayZ on youtube. I haven't even played video games till 5 months ago, except for occasional CS:GO and Warzone. Previous Battlefields are probably best shooters ever, not sure about new one. But haven't got much experience with Battlefield myself.

Day Z is a really challenging game but there's something addictive about it. Putting cars together, getting decent weapons and attachments, burying gear all over the place, killing zombies, rading bases, building your own bases, teaming up and realtime interaction where you don't know whether to shoot or ally up..... It's thrilling. Very rewarding. But you have to think ahead and make clever moves because you can lose everyrhing to a bad decision or an unseen adversary and you're back to square one, washed up on a beaxh with nothing but a piece of fruit and some wet clothes. It's nuts. But great!

Glad to see someone else that appreciated some of the earlier battlefield bad company games. :)

 

[Al_stargate]

Day Z is a really challenging game but there's something addictive about it. Putting cars together, getting decent weapons and attachments, burying gear all over the place, killing zombies, rading bases, building your own bases, teaming up and realtime interaction where you don't know whether to shoot or ally up..... It's thrilling. Very rewarding. But you have to think ahead and make clever moves because you can lose everyrhing to a bad decision or an unseen adversary and you're back to square one, washed up on a beaxh with nothing but a piece of fruit and some wet clothes. It's nuts. But great!

Glad to see someone else that appreciated some of the earlier battlefield bad company games. :)

How bout Escape from Tsarkov. You tried that? Supposed to be similar but more shooter orianted?

 

[Smart No More]

How bout Escape from Tsarkov. You tried that? Supposed to be similar but more shooter orianted?

Is that the Stalker game? It is right? I always wanted to give them a try. But never got around to it properly. Had a copy on pc but it was all in russian lol. Don't know if it ever made it to consoles.

EDIT - just looked up Escape from Tarkov. Looks good man. It's not a S.T.A.L.K.E.R game after all but they share some similarities. The stalker games always drew me in and I'm really disappointed I never got to enjoy them before this illness took over. Stalker escape from Pripyat was the one I was initially looking at but I think there are 3 games in the series. Well worth a look if you like Escape from Tarkov. I may look into that myself too at some point but it's hard work lately tbh. Good heads up though man. Thanks.

 

[Al_stargate]

Is that the Stalker game? It is right? I always wanted to give them a try. But never got around to it properly. Had a copy on pc but it was all in russian lol. Don't know if it ever made it to consoles.

Similar but not same. Escape from Tarkov is a tactical shooter, you also collect items. Anyway, I'm not really into games so my knowledge is just what I read.

 

[Smart No More]

Similar but not same. Escape from Tarkov is a tactical shooter, you also collect items. Anyway, I'm not really into games so my knowledge is just what I read.

Yeah, no, I looked it up too. Looks decent. I edited my post after looking it up. You must have posted while I was typing.

 

[lavendersrue]

Have you considered playing games that lack competition? Such as Stardew Valley. Sure, there might be some that take such games to their extremes and speedrun them, but that is a very niche subset of their respective communities.

Seconding this! I'm not very good at video games, though I like playing them. RPGs, MMOs, FPS, arcade games, etc. are usually too frustrating, so I prefer to play chill games like Animal Crossing or Stardew Valley. Casual games are nice to play when you're having a hard time. They're simple and low-stress. Visual novels are good too, if you're okay with reading a lot of text.

And like Smart No More said, there's nothing wrong with putting games on an easier mode. It doesn't mean that you're bad at gaming or a loser. It just makes it easier to get a feel for the game.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I suck at vidya too. Always like two steps behind everyone else. I'm dead before I even figure out what happened. But then I am old and suffer from derealization. I have gone back to playing old school isometric RPGs and whatnot.

 

[Ironweed]

I bought Cities Skylines years ago, but just opened it for the first time a few days ago. Literally can't figure out how to connect my nascent town to the highway, which appears to be the only way to attract people to live in the town. The road just won't connect, LMAO.

The stupider I felt the angrier I got. And the angrier I got the less interested in, oh, I dunno, spending thirty seconds on YouTube to figure out what blindingly obvious thing I was doing wrong I became. I literally gave myself an attack of diahhrea by the end of it.

Which is weird because while I certainly have my emotional issues, this kind of thing isn't typically one of them. I guess going from 70-80 hours a week at work to being laid off is kind of messing with my equilibrium.

In any event I'm not sure I'll EVER go back to that damn game.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

This is why I started playing Pokémon Unite a lot more. You can get all the way to the highest rank each season with even a 40% win rate, it just takes more time. Almost everyone sucks at the game so you don't have to feel as bad about playing like garbage.