feel like i’m nearing the end

[dejadoom]

turned 23 on friday, worked all day, went out drinking with my friends and went home with this guy i've been screwing to fill a void lol. on saturday i went to a nice art museum and a charming diner and today my family had a nice birthday meal prepared for me. whole time it felt like it was something i was giving them kind of as a token of remembrance, i made it a point to try to be as mentally present as possible for everyone. but i am so tired now, i think i'm going to go out on friday and get ungodly drunk, maybe have sex one last time and then hang myself. i'll have everything ready in my room for when i make it home so i don't have to drunkenly struggle with the noose too long. i've started drafting a letter today and i feel relieved for once in my life. i am so excited to just sleep

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand why you'd be looking forward to leaving this existence, I wish you the best of luck with your plans.