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Parnate

Experienced
Dec 16, 2021
206
I recently went to my parents, my sister was also there. I told them that I don't want to get married, that I am better off alone cause of my mental issues (depression, avpd, anxiety etc. ) but my parents and also my sister are trying to convince me. My father said it is all in my head . There is nothing wrong with me and I am alright! I just need to change my thinking, that I am reading a lot of negative literature and that is the reason for all this.
I stopped telling my family about my issues cause they are in denial about it.
All this is bringing back the past memories of them gaslighting me over my mental illness and other issue.
I even told my father that it is with great difficulty and efforts that I have been able to strike a balance to maintain my present job and I just can't bear anymore additional responsibilities or any more stresses, but they are so blind and dumb and deaf to my words.
 
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banger12

banger12

Former nerd; current burden
Aug 1, 2024
197
I am so sorry. I feel for you. That's a deeply personal decision and that should be determined by the person themselves and not subject to familial pressure. On the note of family minimizing negative experiences and blaming it on trivial, unrelated things, I know how it feels, it sucks and I get the frustration. But as upsetting as it is try to extend some empathy to people who don't get it. Its hard for me too and I often fail but when people do that it's not typically out of malice, even though it can feel like that. Though the marriage pressure thing is much less defensive and a bigger deal, so any apprehension about empathy or frustration you feel toward them is certainly warranted.
 
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