L
lostchild
Member
- Nov 6, 2019
- 15
There are so many people who have committed suicide. So many people know people who have done it.
Yet when tried; multiple times, despite having literally no reason not to do it, every reason to do it, and nothing but misery awaiting if backed away; it was impossible.
No matter how long time was spent stood balanced on the railing or sat with the comfort of the noose around the neck. (partial hanging. Too much of a shitty disgusting coward to do a painful method.) couldn't do it. Wanted to. More than anything. Suicide is the only comforting thought. Nothing waiting, no home to return to. The brain uses every excuse it can to get you to stop, and you fear it deeply but only when youre about to.
Why so much of a failure that can't even do something everyone else has already done.
It's almost like all this "misery" and "pain" that is "complained" about by the self is all brought upon the self. If it REALLY wanted to stop the pain, it would hurry up and ctb already. But no. Sticks around for no reason. Like a demon who's only purpose is to make life living hell for everyone around it by refusing to leave. The mere presence is a virus and a tragedy. Pure evil.
(No intention to harm others. These words apply to the self, not to others reading.)
Yet when tried; multiple times, despite having literally no reason not to do it, every reason to do it, and nothing but misery awaiting if backed away; it was impossible.
No matter how long time was spent stood balanced on the railing or sat with the comfort of the noose around the neck. (partial hanging. Too much of a shitty disgusting coward to do a painful method.) couldn't do it. Wanted to. More than anything. Suicide is the only comforting thought. Nothing waiting, no home to return to. The brain uses every excuse it can to get you to stop, and you fear it deeply but only when youre about to.
Why so much of a failure that can't even do something everyone else has already done.
It's almost like all this "misery" and "pain" that is "complained" about by the self is all brought upon the self. If it REALLY wanted to stop the pain, it would hurry up and ctb already. But no. Sticks around for no reason. Like a demon who's only purpose is to make life living hell for everyone around it by refusing to leave. The mere presence is a virus and a tragedy. Pure evil.
(No intention to harm others. These words apply to the self, not to others reading.)