Discussion Experiences with group therapy

[StolenLife]

Has anyone else been in a group therapy for their issues? I'm currently in one and so far I have mixed opinions. What are your experiences with it? Did it help or is it completely useless?

 

[LunarPyotr]

Depends if it's anonymous and who organizes it.

I was visiting something like a group therapy in my city, where people meet, you didn't had to sign anything and we could just use imaginary names.
In my experience it was great and chill. It took like a hour where we had one 10minutes break to talk with each other and so on which was kinda hard since I'm kinda a introvert but still, it was a very pleasant experience and it was actually free.
But to be honest, it wasn't fully helpful for me personally and one day I stopped going there. Just didn't went and send through my disposable mail app a message for the organizer, thanking him that he gave all the people a place to meet and discuss stuff.

 

[Someone123]

It can help but in a way it seems like a scam- you can charge a bunch of people but you never focus on any one person's problems for long.

 

[donealready]

I've had a lot of group therapy. I can relate to the conflicted feelings and mixed opinions. It didn't 'fix' me, I don't believe the point was to, but i did gain insights and learnt a lot. Tools to help manage myself in healthier ways, the feeling of connection and empathy and that kinda gave me a bit of hope and bought me many more years. At that time, it did reduce my desire to CTB. It did reduce, not completely remove my need to self-harm. I gained understanding as to why I do the things I do to cope. I received validation that I didn't even know I needed. I realised I was not alone.

I can only acknowledge these things some 15+ years later. At the time I hated it all the time, fought against the system and promised myself I would quit it all the time.

I don't know if that helps or just sounds stupidly positive. I find myself back in a tricky situation with my mental health. I think it can depend on your diagnosis and your expectations.

I don't regret the time, energy and tears I put into trying to recover.

 

[LonelyEmerald]

helped me

 

[AnxietyHangover]

It can help but in a way it seems like a scam- you can charge a bunch of people but you never focus on any one person's problems for long.

I guess it can be effective for people affected by solitude. You get to meet new people.

 

[Someone123]

I guess it can be effective for people affected by solitude. You get to meet new people.

It can get some people some, it must work sometimes.

 

[Moonomyth]

My experience with group therapy was done during a state of commitment, so its applicability is probably limited. Nevertheless:

We met twice daily over the course of a week, usually in the late morning and then the middle of the afternoon. Attendance wasn't mandatory but a majority of people on the ward went anyway, because staff were taking notes on who wasn't going very often.

Usually lasted about 45 minutes to an hour depending on scheduling delays. Because the people on the ward were there for a variety of different cases - suicide watch in my case, schizophrenia in others, anger management in others - it was hard to cover a consistent theme or talk about coping mechanisms or issues unique to a specific illness.

Typically we were introduced to basic coping mechanisms or psychological concepts like Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Because they were only addressed briefly and patients weren't really going to be there long enough to explore them in-depth, they weren't internalized. Because the people there often didn't want to be there, responses were limited to what was necessary to get out of commitment. People who had harder times managing their mental state became combative, sometimes against their best interests.

The staff who ran these meetings was clearly engaged and trying her best but struggled to actually keep the groups on-task. There was some basic sexism in this: She was a fairly small woman in a group therapy surrounded by larger, surly guys who took both gender and size as reason to disregard her views. But another part involved difficulty she had in communicating concepts to the other patients in ways they understand; on several occasions, I had to step in on her behalf to rephrase or clarify something she'd said to other people because I was already familiar with them from my own education, and to help keep the group from getting out of control.

Based on all of that, I think for group therapy to work you'd need to find a group specific to the issue you're dealing with, make sure there's a core roster of people who are regularly attending who are operating in good faith and aren't necessarily being forced to be there due to court order or something, and, lastly, have a moderator who is skilled at managing the group without dominating the conversation. Do you feel like your group is meeting that standard or can reach it?

 

[ConstantPain]

I can see where it has been quite helpful for some people and think that's great. I personally hated it, probably because I'm such an introvert and have social anxiety. If it doesn't exacerbate high anxiety, it's probably worthwhile to give
it a legit shot.

 

[Rairii]

I mean sometimes they did, it just depends on the people who are in it and the person leading it. I felt like it didn't necessarily play a huge role in helping for the main problems I was going for. There were times that some people gave some great advice or insight that I hadn't thought of and of course not feeling alone is helpful. It did have the unexpected role of actually helping with my fear of public speaking and lack of confidence in myself, I learned that I was actually an insightful person and that people valued what I had to say so that really touched me a lot especially after growing up being told I was unintelligent and constantly being shut down anytime I spoke.

The other experience I had was not helpful and at times harmful and this was larger on part of the people in it were basically forced to be there and had no intention on recovery/maybe recovery was not possible for them and the person running it didn't do a good job with structure or redirecting things. Both of these group therapies took place in residential eating disorder facilities so its probably a bit different from regular group therapy where you go home at the end of the day. Like with the second experience there was cliques and bullying which obviously made the group therapy dynamic more difficult.

 

[pipapo]

in clinics but oftentimes the old people were annoying. nothing against them tbh, but they were just venting about back pain and stuff and not mental issues

 

[StolenLife]

My experience with group therapy was done during a state of commitment, so its applicability is probably limited. Nevertheless:

We met twice daily over the course of a week, usually in the late morning and then the middle of the afternoon. Attendance wasn't mandatory but a majority of people on the ward went anyway, because staff were taking notes on who wasn't going very often.

Usually lasted about 45 minutes to an hour depending on scheduling delays. Because the people on the ward were there for a variety of different cases - suicide watch in my case, schizophrenia in others, anger management in others - it was hard to cover a consistent theme or talk about coping mechanisms or issues unique to a specific illness.

Typically we were introduced to basic coping mechanisms or psychological concepts like Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Because they were only addressed briefly and patients weren't really going to be there long enough to explore them in-depth, they weren't internalized. Because the people there often didn't want to be there, responses were limited to what was necessary to get out of commitment. People who had harder times managing their mental state became combative, sometimes against their best interests.

The staff who ran these meetings was clearly engaged and trying her best but struggled to actually keep the groups on-task. There was some basic sexism in this: She was a fairly small woman in a group therapy surrounded by larger, surly guys who took both gender and size as reason to disregard her views. But another part involved difficulty she had in communicating concepts to the other patients in ways they understand; on several occasions, I had to step in on her behalf to rephrase or clarify something she'd said to other people because I was already familiar with them from my own education, and to help keep the group from getting out of control.

Based on all of that, I think for group therapy to work you'd need to find a group specific to the issue you're dealing with, make sure there's a core roster of people who are regularly attending who are operating in good faith and aren't necessarily being forced to be there due to court order or something, and, lastly, have a moderator who is skilled at managing the group without dominating the conversation. Do you feel like your group is meeting that standard or can reach it?

My group is quite similar to yours, we write a lot, have homework and go to coffee and such along with doctors and nurses. However the issue is that it's too far away from where I live so attendance is really impractical, and yet my doctor won't listen. And I'm too fucked up to be helped since my issues are too deeply rooted and I get barely any time to talk about myself and my problems. Mixed feelings overall, thouh at least it gives me people to socialize with and something to do while I'm on Leave of absence.

 

[Moonomyth]

My group is quite similar to yours, we write a lot, have homework and go to coffee and such along with doctors and nurses. However the issue is that it's too far away from where I live so attendance is really impractical, and yet my doctor won't listen. And I'm too fucked up to be helped since my issues are too deeply rooted and I get barely any time to talk about myself and my problems. Mixed feelings overall, thouh at least it gives me people to socialize with and something to do while I'm on Leave of absence.

Good point regarding travel concerns. Probably the one strong point about group therapy while committed was ease of access, since I was in the same building.

Are there reasons this group has to be the specific one you attend according to your doctor? If not, is there any chance of finding a different one closer by?

 

[StolenLife]

Good point regarding travel concerns. Probably the one strong point about group therapy while committed was ease of access, since I was in the same building.

Are there reasons this group has to be the specific one you attend according to your doctor? If not, is there any chance of finding a different one closer by?

There are no specific reasons as far as I know, my doctor didn't ask if I want to go nor did he inform me why I have to go. I have to go in that exact hospital because that's where I was hospitalised due to my ctb attempt. I hate it but my parents force me to go and I don't know how to get out of it.

 

[Moonomyth]

There are no specific reasons as far as I know, my doctor didn't ask if I want to go nor did he inform me why I have to go. I have to go in that exact hospital because that's where I was hospitalised due to my ctb attempt. I hate it but my parents force me to go and I don't know how to get out of it.

If they can force you to go because you're under 18, that's a tough situation and there aren't a lot of options for getting out of it. The most likely reason is that the admitting hospital has the records of your stay and can use those to chart progress, but as you said above, it's very likely that this kind of therapy - everybody is forced to be there for legal reasons, everybody has a different problem, and people don't have relatively equal levels of coping skills - isn't going to be effective.

If you are over 18, and your parents are forcing you to go because they have some sort of leverage over you like control of your finances and a place to stay, you have a few more options, but using them will be more drastic. Otherwise, it's possible that they can employ state resources like police wellness checks to commit you and start the process over again.

If possible, I'd start documenting what's happening in group therapy independent of any notes the moderator is taking to provide some evidence of ineffectiveness. Be as thorough as you can without revealing private information about the patients. Treat it like taking the minutes of each meeting. If you can provide some documented evidence of what isn't helping and why to your doctor, you may be able to convince them to at least find a new group session. You should also consult with the hospital's Patient Rights Advocate on the subject as a third-party.

 

[SectOfValtiel]

ive been to anxious to try on account of my social anxiety, but its been offered twice now
therapist wanted me to contact a sex addiction anonymous -type group but that sounds really not fun for a lot of reasons
and now im hearing that group therapy is the most effective means to combating BPD symptoms, but
yeah

im at a point in my life where i dont trust anyone and anyone i ever have has left me severely hurt, or severely disappointed
i despise being alone, it hurts like hell its really unbearable, but i despite being manipulated or left behind or ignored or abandoned maybe even more

so i dont think ill try it any time soon
sounds like itd be worse than doing nothing at all

 

[Ineedtodie]

I' m expecting to have groupe threapy at some point soon in juniary. No actual experience with this. But ran out of meds and support lately. I' m not sure I' M goona have the chance to do it.

 

[StolenLife]

If you are over 18, and your parents are forcing you to go because they have some sort of leverage over you like control of your finances and a place to stay, you have a few more options, but using them will be more drastic. Otherwise, it's possible that they can employ state resources like police wellness checks to commit you and start the process over again.

If I may ask, what drastic measures do you have in mind? I have tried everything, both talking to parents and the doctor but they are all stubborn.

 

[Bluescreen]

Well, I like to do things on my own, 'cause others don't know or don't want to work as exactly as I do.

I've been in a group Therapy when I was in hospital. And sitting together with the people from whom I could learn something, like the Therapist said, wouldn't happen. See, you can only learn from people who are better than you. But the others also are in hospital, because they don't got things done. Clearly, I would learn how to fail more, because they can't do the things I also can't, and they have other Troubles, which would also infect me.

So, group therapy is just bullshit.

 

[Moonomyth]

If I may ask, what drastic measures do you have in mind? I have tried everything, both talking to parents and the doctor but they are all stubborn.

Drastic in this case means leave. If you're over 18 and you're not obligated by court order to attend therapy and see this doctor, then you don't have to.

That's the theory on paper, anyway. In practice, there are probably material reasons you can't do that. It sounds like you live with your parents and wouldn't have a place to stay or the financial means to get a place to stay on short notice, so they have a hold on you. Leaving would mean vanishing in such a way that your parents wouldn't be able to find you in order to call a wellness check and have you recommitted, and would most likely mean living on the street if you don't have the means to find a place of your own.

You don't want to do that. Trust me, it sucks. I know therapy is miserable, but all the things that make you feel bad now would be amped up 2-5x if you were feeling them without a roof over your head, no meal in sight and shitty weather. If it comes to staying in ineffective therapy or having to go out onto the street, stay in therapy.

If that isn't the case - if you have your own money, and it would be possible for you to find a place and conceal your location from your parents - then leaving becomes a better option. But only then.

Less drastic would be to get a second opinion. This also relies on money, but probably less than having to get a place to stay. If you are still on your parents' insurance, they may also cover you finding a psychiatrist who takes the same plan. You can discuss these concerns with that practitioner, and they may be able to help mediate your situation with your current doctor and your family. The downside of this is that this will show up as a claim on your family's insurance and they'll know.

The more expensive version of this would be to pay out of pocket. This would be less expensive than trying to find your own place, but still not cheap. Tele-health services can provide lower-cost alternatives, but the counselors there are not often licensed psychiatrists. That may not matter to you, but if you asked their assistance in figuring out how to negotiate finding a new place for group therapy, a psychiatrist talking to another psychiatrist would have more weight than a crisis counselor or nurse-practitioner with counseling certification doing the same.

Lastly, you may want to consider resources for abusive situations and people seeking to escape abusive situations in your area. These would be most effective if you could demonstrate some form of physical, emotional, or mental abuse; unfortunately, "Family and doctor insist I go to a specific group therapy session that I don't think is very helpful" wouldn't qualify on its own.

 

[StolenLife]

Drastic in this case means leave. If you're over 18 and you're not obligated by court order to attend therapy and see this doctor, then you don't have to.

That's the theory on paper, anyway. In practice, there are probably material reasons you can't do that. It sounds like you live with your parents and wouldn't have a place to stay or the financial means to get a place to stay on short notice, so they have a hold on you. Leaving would mean vanishing in such a way that your parents wouldn't be able to find you in order to call a wellness check and have you recommitted, and would most likely mean living on the street if you don't have the means to find a place of your own.

You don't want to do that. Trust me, it sucks. I know therapy is miserable, but all the things that make you feel bad now would be amped up 2-5x if you were feeling them without a roof over your head, no meal in sight and shitty weather. If it comes to staying in ineffective therapy or having to go out onto the street, stay in therapy.

If that isn't the case - if you have your own money, and it would be possible for you to find a place and conceal your location from your parents - then leaving becomes a better option. But only then.

Less drastic would be to get a second opinion. This also relies on money, but probably less than having to get a place to stay. If you are still on your parents' insurance, they may also cover you finding a psychiatrist who takes the same plan. You can discuss these concerns with that practitioner, and they may be able to help mediate your situation with your current doctor and your family. The downside of this is that this will show up as a claim on your family's insurance and they'll know.

The more expensive version of this would be to pay out of pocket. This would be less expensive than trying to find your own place, but still not cheap. Tele-health services can provide lower-cost alternatives, but the counselors there are not often licensed psychiatrists. That may not matter to you, but if you asked their assistance in figuring out how to negotiate finding a new place for group therapy, a psychiatrist talking to another psychiatrist would have more weight than a crisis counselor or nurse-practitioner with counseling certification doing the same.

Lastly, you may want to consider resources for abusive situations and people seeking to escape abusive situations in your area. These would be most effective if you could demonstrate some form of physical, emotional, or mental abuse; unfortunately, "Family and doctor insist I go to a specific group therapy session that I don't think is very helpful" wouldn't qualify on its own.

Thank you. Never mind, I'll just suck it up until I'm done. It's not worth the hassle.

 

[Ineedtodie]

Perhaps I will actually make it to such group therapy experience. I just have to benzo my emotions until Monday. LIKE DOING NOW. oh how dreadful my life actually is. What to expect. No idea. Well it can't be worse than my current daily life.

alone is helpful. It did have the unexpected role of actually helping with my fear of public speaking and lack of confidence in myself,

This sound like a good thing that one might expect. Good it happened to you.

The other experience I had was not helpful and at times harmful and this was larger on part of the people in it were basically forced to be there and had no intention on recovery/maybe recovery was not possible for them and the person running it didn't do a good job with structure or redirecting t

This is something to be weary of too.
This ia smth to be wary of as well. Hoping that i won't be the most "toxic" one there haha

Like with the second experience there was cliques and bullying which obviously made the group therapy dynamic more difficult.

Bullying is such wierd occurance in such groups to expect happening.

mean sometimes they did, it just depends on the people who are in it and the person leading it. I

Group therapy sounds like real life at this point. Maybe I' m execting either too much or I' stupid enough to no expect anything and just being desparate haha

felt like it didn't necessarily play a huge role in helping for the main problems I was going fo

I can understand that. I' m starting to think of it like a one day or session to escape my own life.

It did have the unexpected role of actually helping with my fear of public speaking and lack of confidence in myself, I learned that I was actually an insightful person and that people valued what I had to say so that really touched me a lot especially after growing up being told I was unintelligent and constantly being shut down anytime I spoke.

Nice you explored how actually you're capable and insightful and been heard and acknowledged for that. Thank you for sharing, this was helpful alot.

alone is helpful. It did have the unexpected role of actually helping with my fear of public speaking and lack of confidence in myself,

This sound like a good thing that one might expect. Good it happened to you.

The other experience I had was not helpful and at times harmful and this was larger on part of the people in it were basically forced to be there and had no intention on recovery/maybe recovery was not possible for them and the person running it didn't do a good job with structure or redirecting t

This is something to be weary of too.
This ia smth to be wary of as well. Hoping that i won't be the most "toxic" one there haha

Like with the second experience there was cliques and bullying which obviously made the group therapy dynamic more difficult.

Bullying is such wierd occurance in such groups to expect happening.

mean sometimes they did, it just depends on the people who are in it and the person leading it. I

Group therapy sounds like real life at this point. Maybe I' m execting either too much or I' stupid enough to no expect anything and just being desparate haha

felt like it didn't necessarily play a huge role in helping for the main problems I was going fo

I can understand that. I' m starting to think of it like a one day or session to escape my own life.

It did have the unexpected role of actually helping with my fear of public speaking and lack of confidence in myself, I learned that I was actually an insightful person and that people valued what I had to say so that really touched me a lot especially after growing up being told I was unintelligent and constantly being shut down anytime I spoke.

Nice you explored how actually you're capable and insightful and been heard and acknowledged for that. Thank you for sharing, this was helpful alot.

im at a point in my life where i dont trust anyone and anyone i ever have has left me severely hurt, or severely disappointed
i despise being alone, it hurts like hell its really unbearable, but i despite being manipulated or left behind or ignored or abandoned maybe even more

I share those feelings. A tough spot to be in.

was visiting something like a group therapy in my city, where people meet, you didn't had to sign anything and we could just use imaginary names.

That would be a nice vibe to have. More privacy and less paranoia about possible harm. You never know.

my experience it was great and chill. It took like a hour where we had one 10minutes break to talk with each other and so on which was kinda hard since I'm kinda a introvert but still, it was a very pleasant experience and it was actually free.

Sounds chill . Being free is helpful too.

 

[Moonomyth]

Thank you. Never mind, I'll just suck it up until I'm done. It's not worth the hassle.

Sorry there aren't better resources available in the circumstances. How long do you expect to be required to attend?

 

[Ineedtodie]

Usually lasted about 45 minutes to an hour depending on scheduling delays. Because the people on the ward were there for a variety of different cases - suicide watch in my case, schizophrenia in others, anger management in others - it was hard to cover a consistent theme or talk about coping mechanisms or issues unique to a specific illness.

I see how that could make could affect benefit wise for each party. Sound it lacked coherence in a way that would target specific issues everyone dealing with or having consistent talk and topics.

Typically we were introduced to basic coping mechanisms or psychological concepts like Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Because they were only addressed briefly and patients weren't really going to be there long enough to explore them in-depth, they weren't internalized. Because the people there often didn't want to be there, responses were limited to what was necessary to get out of commitment. People who had harder times managing their mental state became combative, sometimes against their best

I feel like this could be beneficial to make such intros, especially if we are not so drowning in ower own specific issues in ower heads. I can understand why would some patient be defensive and feel mispresented

staff who ran these meetings was clearly engaged and trying her best but struggled to actually keep the groups on-task. There was some basic sexism in this: She was a fairly small woman in a group therapy surrounded by larger, surly guys who took both gender and size as reason to disregard her views. But another part involved difficulty she had in communicating concepts to the other patients in ways they understand; on several occasions, I had to step in on her behalf to rephrase or clarify something she'd said to other people because I was already familiar with them from my own education, and to help keep the group from getting out of control.

Sounds like a real life dilemma where people try to dominate and pull rhe rope to themselfs. Breaking down things can be difficult with lack of openess.

Based on all of that, I think for group therapy to work you'd need to find a group specific to the issue you're dealing with, make sure there's a core roster of people who are regularly attending who are operating in good faith and aren't necessarily being forced to be there due to court order or something, and, lastly, have a moderator who is skilled at managing the group without dominating the conversation. Do you feel like your group is meeting that standard or can reach it?

This is a good list of requirements to check before expecting much. Thank you for sharing.

My group is quite similar to yours, we write a lot, have homework and go to coffee and such along with doctors and nurses. However the issue is that it's too far away from where I live so attendance is really impractical, and yet my doctor won't listen. And I'm too fucked up to be helped since my issues are too deeply rooted and I get barely any time to talk about myself and my problems. Mixed feelings overall, thouh at least it gives me people to socialize with and something to do while I'm on Leave of absence.

My problem are too deep rooted as well. People seems to agree there sre benifits eitherway more often in certain standards.

 

[StolenLife]

Sorry there aren't better resources available in the circumstances. How long do you expect to be required to attend?

Five more weeks. The whole thing lasts three months total.

 

[Moonomyth]

Five more weeks. The whole thing lasts three months total.

Gotcha. A month and change is survivable at this point, even if it is pretty miserable as an experience, so I understand not wanting to do something drastic given the relatively short amount of time remaining. You're welcome to vent about bad experiences here, of course, and documenting your experiences could be helpful for other people who might be going into group therapy as well.

Hang in there, and keep us posted.

 

[girlsboysthems]

I see how that could make could affect benefit wise for each party. Sound it lacked coherence in a way that would target specific issues everyone dealing with or having consistent talk and topics.

I feel like this could be beneficial to make such intros, especially if we are not so drowning in ower own specific issues in ower heads. I can understand why would some patient be defensive and feel mispresented

Sounds like a real life dilemma where people try to dominate and pull rhe rope to themselfs. Breaking down things can be difficult with lack of openess.

This is a good list of requirements to check before expecting much. Thank you for sharing.

My problem are too deep rooted as well. People seems to agree there sre benifits eitherway more often in certain standards.

hey I see you started group therapy in january, do you mind sharing how its going? I had my first session yesterday and I'm really conflicted about some things (just how it went, how you felt etc, no mentioning other people's stuff)...

 

[icantstopcoughing]

I hated mine, it was awful. I was told I needed 1:1 therapy not group which was great. I gained nothing from it, I literally missed sessions to go to unimportant tests just to skip it. It sucked so much. Especially like the whole your not meant to say anything about what anyone says outside of the group. You know that ain't true. Their gonna tell their friends and families which made me feel even better about there.

I have been put back on group therapy which starts soon. I ain't looking forward to it. I hate groups of people on a good day let alone in therapy