goodoldnoname923
Wanting to find peace
- Mar 28, 2024
- 835
Honestly i've been trying to cash my tickets for sometime now but situations and shit keep getting in the way and its kinda annoying and i'm not even talking about SI or my inactions or subconscious self sabotage
It's always external factors at play stopping me that are completely out of my control such as
A new friend appearing out of nowhere that prevented me CTB'ing today
The broken malwai tent bought it and the zip bust out the box
Other inconviences
That chat i joined recently boosted my mood but not changed my life at all
My friend who was supposed to come around and help me couldn't so i didn't get to access the DW
My other friend had inconveniences happen which stopped him aiding me while he could
And way more i'm forgetting about
I just wonder if its a sign or something or just someone genuinely trying to fuck with me because i cant tell
I'm still suffering snd in pain i just wanna die but fuck man
I'm just waiting for the stars to align,i'm waiting for my emotions to explode i'm waiting for the dark sky to arise and the moon to shine for my recovery to be impossible for people to be around for me to post my goodbye thread and for me to do what needs to be done…I'm waiting desperately for that day to come i hope it is soon i hope it is tonight but i wont know until it happens and arrives
It's always external factors at play stopping me that are completely out of my control such as
A new friend appearing out of nowhere that prevented me CTB'ing today
The broken malwai tent bought it and the zip bust out the box
Other inconviences
That chat i joined recently boosted my mood but not changed my life at all
My friend who was supposed to come around and help me couldn't so i didn't get to access the DW
My other friend had inconveniences happen which stopped him aiding me while he could
And way more i'm forgetting about
I just wonder if its a sign or something or just someone genuinely trying to fuck with me because i cant tell
I'm still suffering snd in pain i just wanna die but fuck man
I'm just waiting for the stars to align,i'm waiting for my emotions to explode i'm waiting for the dark sky to arise and the moon to shine for my recovery to be impossible for people to be around for me to post my goodbye thread and for me to do what needs to be done…I'm waiting desperately for that day to come i hope it is soon i hope it is tonight but i wont know until it happens and arrives
