berd
Member
- Feb 24, 2022
- 34
(tw)
Ever since I was in seventh grade, I've felt miserable. I felt like life was a chore. I would lock myself in my room for hours, wasting my entire day in bed. I got the courage to tell my mom that I might be depressed a few months into eighth grade, she shrugged it off and acted like I said nothing. I tried to kill myself when I was fourteen due to my parents stressing me out with their marriage problems and making my own problems even worse. Then during sophomore year I told her the exact same thing and asked for a person to talk to, I looked over at her only to find out she fell asleep while I was telling her everything. That's when I quit asking her for help because I realized she didn't care. I used to rely on my dad for therapy but I'd have to remind him daily to help me find a person. I gave up on asking him because I knew I'd never get the help I wished for. Now everything has gotten worse for me. I've developed suicidal thoughts and I can't even bare to look at myself in the mirror without feeling disgusted. I've felt numb for the past few months, I can't even remember when I was genuinely happy. I haven't ctb yet, mostly due to my fear of dying.
Ever since I was in seventh grade, I've felt miserable. I felt like life was a chore. I would lock myself in my room for hours, wasting my entire day in bed. I got the courage to tell my mom that I might be depressed a few months into eighth grade, she shrugged it off and acted like I said nothing. I tried to kill myself when I was fourteen due to my parents stressing me out with their marriage problems and making my own problems even worse. Then during sophomore year I told her the exact same thing and asked for a person to talk to, I looked over at her only to find out she fell asleep while I was telling her everything. That's when I quit asking her for help because I realized she didn't care. I used to rely on my dad for therapy but I'd have to remind him daily to help me find a person. I gave up on asking him because I knew I'd never get the help I wished for. Now everything has gotten worse for me. I've developed suicidal thoughts and I can't even bare to look at myself in the mirror without feeling disgusted. I've felt numb for the past few months, I can't even remember when I was genuinely happy. I haven't ctb yet, mostly due to my fear of dying.
