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Truthfully, I don't know. Maybe it is the fear talking, but I guess maybe? I was probably going to make another thread talking about what's been going through my head but in a nutshell, I feel like I owe it to myself to attempt. The last few days/weeks I've been so lost in my mind trying to make sense of my feelings towards suicide. Lately, leaving it up to chance is what feels right. I figured I may as well do it, but if I'm found then I guess that's how things are gonna be. I want this (or maybe I am just telling myself that), but I also don't trust myself to make the call. All I know is that I'm exhausted with where my life is at and where it's been and where it's going, and that in spite of the fact that I want more out of my life, I don't think I'm gonna get it. Something needs to happen and I guess this is it.
Thanks for this reply, I was initially going to go with SN since it seemed like a better option, but due to circumstances that fell through. These are all I had atm so I came here to ask about these.Never tried overdosing on those specific drugs at that amount but I've tried to OD on other benzos + zdrugs (+ alcohol). I think you'd probably end up in a psych ward after doing dumb things (& continue doing dumb things until you're "awake"). Ambien is a zdrug makes you hallucinate & blackout & do dumb things, clonazepam is a benzo that makes you blackout & do dumb things. You might really regret for a long time what you do when blacked out, I do
No problem. I'm not a doctor but felt I should respond because when I was ~15-17 I had problems with 2 (other) specific benzo & zdrug so I've gone through a lot of blackouts & know that they can mess your life up more. I'd be more specific about what happened during mine but not comfortable. Some vague is that I was delusional & hallucinated some, told people personal things I wish I didn't, got taken (sexually) advantage of, I stressed out someone I loved very much & it didn't end well, I ended up in the psych ward, I tried to threaten psych ward staff which made me stay longer, I screamed personal stuff in public, I hurt myself etc. Can't say for certain what would happen to you but want you to be aware what might happen
Yeah, I ought to. Things have been awfully convoluted lately, which makes things difficult, but ill be sure to write it out here later tonight.
you mention something right,sexuality, this is the most inner powerfull energy inside of us.drug are not much agains'nt this power went you masterise it and undertand it. but most importantly you need to feel it in the right positive rules of god.No problem. I'm not a doctor but felt I should respond because when I was ~15-17 I had problems with 2 (other) specific benzo & zdrug so I've gone through a lot of blackouts & know that they can mess your life up more. I'd be more specific about what happened during mine but not comfortable. Some vague is that I was delusional & hallucinated some, told people personal things I wish I didn't, got taken (sexually) advantage of, I stressed out someone I loved very much & it didn't end well, I ended up in the psych ward, I tried to threaten psych ward staff which made me stay longer, I screamed personal stuff in public, I hurt myself etc. Can't say for certain what would happen to you but want you to be aware what might happen
EDIT: also I think you should make that thread about what's on your mind. If you're not sure about CTB I think writing it can help you sort your thoughts out
well, i told one man one thing, human body is an extremely wonderfull creation.
