eating disorders

[luten]

Anyone here with eating disorders? If so, how does it affect your daily life?

 

[Life_and_Death]

yes

it doesnt bother me too much personally i just eat when i eat but others are always concerned if im going to eat.

sometimes all i do it eat however sometimes my stomach can grumble and i can/will honestly tell you 'im not hungry' and i can go a couple days like this. sometimes its a 'weight' thing where i 'optionally' say i dont want food. i dont have a problem weight but i wouldnt mind being skinnier even though that would put me under. (i hope to fix this problem in a more healthy way by exercising. its not the weight its just the way its sitting so i need to tone it)

 

[Lucien]

I used to replace eating and sleep with caffeine. I feel better on an empty stomach. Also used to obsess about having low body fat. From a quick google search you find it causes low mood in otherwise healthy people. For me it was nasty afternoon mood swings. I also hate eating in public so that probably plays a part.

Some common anxiety meds can make you gain weight but so far I've felt zero change.

 

[insanedoomer]

Hey , ye ofc it creates compulsive day dreams related to paranoia i almost don't eat anything

 

[amarillo]

Yep. Constantly thinking about what I've eaten, how much I have "left" to eat and what and when I should eat just sucks up a lot of energy. Also hating myself when I've once again eaten too much doesn't help with the good moods.

 

[WornOutLife]

Yes, that's me!
I have dinner like at 3:00am in the morning and lunch at 5:00pm lol.
To make matters worse, I couldn't sleep properly but my new meds are helping lots.
All of this has made me super duper fatter.

I think I have this problem because of my work (which I love). Sometimes I work in the morning, and some others in the afternoon or at night.

 

[luten]

Yes, that's me!
I have dinner like at 3:00am in the morning and lunch at 5:00pm lol.
To make matters worse, I couldn't sleep properly but my new meds are helping lots.
All of this has made me super duper fatter.

I think I have this problem because of my work (which I love). Sometimes I work in the morning, and some others in the afternoon or at night.

3am...hectic ! I also use sleep meds, but i have been using it for 15 years, and i am currently on an overdose regime (as prescribed). I am really happy to see that you enjoy your work.

 

[Octavina]

Ruined my life. Had to go into hospital last week because my potassium was so low that I could've died. Next time I get a blood test and it is dangerously low again I'm just gonna wait for my heart to give out. Don't know really if it is a reliable CTB method though

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

Still dealing with *slight* anorexic tendencies, mostly just makes me not eat enough and feel sick/weak to the point of falling on the floor.
Was refused any kind of help by psycologists, since apparently men can't be anorexic, especially not if Our Lord And Savior, Ultimate teller of truth and most accurate, relevant unit of measurement in the world, the BMI, says i'm overweight (disregard the whole thing where i fit in xsmall clothing, have visible ribs, have an hourglass shape, the holy bmi says im fat therefore im fat.)

 

[lofticries]

'I no longer eat food, I eat numbers.'- Like literally I assess how many calories something has before I even take a bite.

I've pretty much suffered with bulimia, ednos, anorexia, binge eating, and orthorexia for almost half of my life. I also used to over exercise like crazy, abuse laxitives, and chew & spit.

My weight pretty much goes from underweight to healthy and then back to underweight depending on my motivation. Never got to the point where I had to be hospitalized though.

I almost ctb on two occasions dealing with my eating disorders though. One where I was at my lowest weight and another time when I was gaining all that weight back to be at my highest weight. Which was a *drum roll* bmi of 21.5. You see how ridiculous this shit is.

As of now I'm fairly thin (suffering from ednos atm) but want to lose 15 (maybe 25) pounds. I guess to feel a bit more confident(I'm tall so i guess in a way I want to feel smaller) and in control of something in my life. There's a rush and a sense of accomplishment when you lose weight. And it can become addicting. When I did go to therapy I rarely talked about my eating disorders despite them being a huge problem in my life. Its almost like I wanted to protect them. And tbh of all the mental problems I have my eating disorder is the one I'm hesitant to work on or give up. Honestly if I were to compare an eating disorder to something it'd be a terrible boyfriend/girlfriend (never had either btw). Yeah, they make most of your life a living hell but sometimes they give you compliments.

 

[virginiawoolf]

having an eating disorder is shit. i'm not at a very low weight at the moment but when i am it is terrible:

• bad mood - so irritable
• brain fog
• really bad breath
• tired all of the time - hard to take care of yourself, altho some people push through
• puffy cheeks sometimes and sometimes they're fluffy
• sleeping problems
• acid reflux
• damaged hair

all of this adds up to: feeling and looking like shit and being unable to take part in society
the worst part is when you first get back to a healthier weight you just shit yourself all of the time. i missed a month of school this way. and it messes up your digestion forever, the acid reflux doesn't go away although it gets better, especially if you slip back into it.

 

[Lucien]

Still dealing with *slight* anorexic tendencies, mostly just makes me not eat enough and feel sick/weak to the point of falling on the floor.
Was refused any kind of help by psycologists, since apparently men can't be anorexic, especially not if Our Lord And Savior, Ultimate teller of truth and most accurate, relevant unit of measurement in the world, the BMI, says i'm overweight (disregard the whole thing where i fit in xsmall clothing, have visible ribs, have an hourglass shape, the holy bmi says im fat therefore im fat.)

If women lose too much weight they risk infertility. That could just be exaggerated scaremongering for all I know. Not sure if a man has a greater chance of becoming impotent. Not an excuse for their reasoning but the way some health care systems are cutting corners I can see this being considered.

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

If women lose too much weight they risk infertility. That could just be exaggerated scaremongering for all I know. Not sure if a man has a greater chance of becoming impotent. Not an excuse for their reasoning.

No idea, but since they still thought me as being a fat fuck despite themselves thinking I was very underweight before making me step on a balance, they didnt bring up any consequence of not eating properly/anorexia/etc on men. It's a good thing Canada's healthcare system is free, or i'd ask for a refund lol.

 

[Lucien]

No idea, but since they still thought me as being a fat fuck despite themselves thinking I was very underweight before making me step on a balance, they didnt bring up any consequence of not eating properly/anorexia/etc on men. It's a good thing Canada's healthcare system is free, or i'd ask for a refund lol.

I just imagined "skinnyfat" becoming an official medical term. As to what happens health wise. I was at a normal BMI and fainted in a pool. Most likely because my body fat was under 7%

 

[BandAddict]

Yes, and it's made life hell. Started disordered behaviours when I was 13 and "thin". Was staying with family and they were very judgemental of my body and congratulated me for eating minute portions and even not eating. I thought I was being "healthy"

At 16 I fell into a deep depression and lost my appetite, which caused me to lose a lot of weight in a short amount of time. I got addicted to it once people started pointing it out, as I hadn't noticed. Then I pretty much exhibited behaviours of every ED under the sun. Ruined my relationships with people, food, and destroyed what was left of my relationship with myself.

Last couple years I was at my worst, stopped menstruating, couldn't hold a conversation or listen to music because I was too fucking busy counting everything and planning my meals and body checking like a fucking maniac. My mom kept expressing concern for how I was looking, but I still felt big even being at low BMI (for whatever that's worth). Everything I did was for my eating disorder, everything.

Shit started getting out of hand and the holidays were making me go crazy and causing confrontations with my mom and I was finally breaking down. I started my first real attempt at recovery early December of last year. Told my mom, opened up to my sibling, finally told my social worker, now my therapist, all to keep myself accountable. Been giving it a good go, but I feel like there are some things that I'll never forget and never get back. Still have extremely difficult days, but I can't seem to do anything else, so might as well keep trying at least. I don't know if I'll ever be at peace with my body the way that it is now at a "healthy" weight.

Eating disorders are fucking horrible. Just horrible. They ruin lives, they make everything shit and hard to enjoy. They manifest fears that are just not rooted in reality at all. And society pretty much condones it. BMI is bullshit. A lot of things are, and even though I know that, it's all stuck in my brain like something that's relevant. Wouldn't wish it on anyone. It makes me sad to know that people suffer like this.

 

[Mentalmick]

I think I have had an eating disorder for a long time, although I have no idea what it is. I eat very little, weigh myself every day, starve myself if I put on weight and I have next to no appetite.

 

[BandAddict]

Sorry to bump this thread back, but I completely blanked on my last post and just wanted to recommend watching or listening to Tabitha Farrar's content about ED recovery, fear of weight gain and such. She's the best I've seen, is a super no-BS person, and I don't think I could have started recovery without her. She covers a wide range of topics and takes it from a biological perspective, you can find her on YouTube and read her old blogs online. She does live videos on YT and you can ask her questions, too! It's a super casual setting and I personally find it more engaging than other recovery accounts that seem too "made-up" if that makes sense.

Her approach just really clicked with me and kinda changed my life. Hope this is helpful to anyone who's struggling.

 

[luten]

yes

it doesnt bother me too much personally i just eat when i eat but others are always concerned if im going to eat.

sometimes all i do it eat however sometimes my stomach can grumble and i can/will honestly tell you 'im not hungry' and i can go a couple days like this. sometimes its a 'weight' thing where i 'optionally' say i dont want food. i dont have a problem weight but i wouldnt mind being skinnier even though that would put me under. (i hope to fix this problem in a more healthy way by exercising. its not the weight its just the way its sitting so i need to tone it)

i had

'I no longer eat food, I eat numbers.'- Like literally I assess how many calories something has before I even take a bite.

I've pretty much suffered with bulimia, ednos, anorexia, binge eating, and orthorexia for almost half of my life. I also used to over exercise like crazy, abuse laxitives, and chew & spit.

My weight pretty much goes from underweight to healthy and then back to underweight depending on my motivation. Never got to the point where I had to be hospitalized though.

I almost ctb on two occasions dealing with my eating disorders though. One where I was at my lowest weight and another time when I was gaining all that weight back to be at my highest weight. Which was a *drum roll* bmi of 21.5. You see how ridiculous this shit is.

As of now I'm fairly thin (suffering from ednos atm) but want to lose 15 (maybe 25) pounds. I guess to feel a bit more confident(I'm tall so i guess in a way I want to feel smaller) and in control of something in my life. There's a rush and a sense of accomplishment when you lose weight. And it can become addicting. When I did go to therapy I rarely talked about my eating disorders despite them being a huge problem in my life. Its almost like I wanted to protect them. And tbh of all the mental problems I have my eating disorder is the one I'm hesitant to work on or give up. Honestly if I were to compare an eating disorder to something it'd be a terrible boyfriend/girlfriend (never had either btw). Yeah, they make most of your life a living hell but sometimes they give you compliments.

Sorry to bump this thread back, but I completely blanked on my last post and just wanted to recommend watching or listening to Tabitha Farrar's content about ED recovery, fear of weight gain and such. She's the best I've seen, is a super no-BS person, and I don't think I could have started recovery without her. She covers a wide range of topics and takes it from a biological perspective, you can find her on YouTube and read her old blogs online. She does live videos on YT and you can ask her questions, too! It's a super casual setting and I personally find it more engaging than other recovery accounts that seem too "made-up" if that makes sense.

Her approach just really clicked with me and kinda changed my life. Hope this is helpful to anyone who's struggling.

thank you, i bookmarked her

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

I went from chronic mild "anorexia" (I put it in quotations because I never accepted this diagnosis) to binge eating disorder after a very traumatic event and also after I got sick. I started using food to numb my emotions and stopped caring, hate this :(

 

[noaccount]

Oh wow Tabitha Farrar's work looks really good!

@Bootleg Astolfo I am so sorry they said that horrible nonsense to you. If you are looking for help you might be able to find people who are size-inclusive and informed about gender bias at https://haescommunity.com/search/

Also people have been leaving good reviews at http://www.fatfriendlydocs.com/canada.html

 

[xLosthopex]

Yes, I've had Anorexia for 10 years, switch between the two subtypes, currently am stuck in the binge/purge cycle, I'm not complaining though, it's the only thing that numbs the pain anymore and I lose a ton of weight from it, win win lol

 

[I'm scared]

'I no longer eat food, I eat numbers.'- Like literally I assess how many calories something has before I even take a bite.

I've pretty much suffered with bulimia, ednos, anorexia, binge eating, and orthorexia for almost half of my life. I also used to over exercise like crazy, abuse laxitives, and chew & spit.

My weight pretty much goes from underweight to healthy and then back to underweight depending on my motivation. Never got to the point where I had to be hospitalized though.

I almost ctb on two occasions dealing with my eating disorders though. One where I was at my lowest weight and another time when I was gaining all that weight back to be at my highest weight. Which was a *drum roll* bmi of 21.5. You see how ridiculous this shit is.

As of now I'm fairly thin (suffering from ednos atm) but want to lose 15 (maybe 25) pounds. I guess to feel a bit more confident(I'm tall so i guess in a way I want to feel smaller) and in control of something in my life. There's a rush and a sense of accomplishment when you lose weight. And it can become addicting. When I did go to therapy I rarely talked about my eating disorders despite them being a huge problem in my life. Its almost like I wanted to protect them. And tbh of all the mental problems I have my eating disorder is the one I'm hesitant to work on or give up. Honestly if I were to compare an eating disorder to something it'd be a terrible boyfriend/girlfriend (never had either btw). Yeah, they make most of your life a living hell but sometimes they give you compliments.

I didn't know chew and spit was a thing until I did CBT for anorexia,just seemed a good idea to get a taste without swallowing food
I hate the feeling of food inside me.I have a phobia of vomiting that has ruled my life and eating