fleetingnight

fleetingnight

incapable of shutting up
May 2, 2024
637
I hate how I'm easily manipulated

I fell for "it's okay, you can be honest about how you feel" again. I don't know how I still fall for that all the time. I know it's never true.
I didn't confess being suicidal, but I told them about something in my personal life that was causing me stress, because they wanted to know. Of course that was a stupid thing to say. All I did was show weakness that they can take advantage of now. I know some people would say this is paranoid or cynical, but it's just the way things are for me. I don't think it's "cynical" to notice real patterns of behavior against me. That just seems logical to me.

I don't know how I'm still so naive, though. I know better, so why do I give ppl the benefit of the doubt anyways? What's wrong with me to keep going against my own insticts and experiences? Am I really so impressionable that if someone says "you can trust me :)" I always listen and trust them? I know that's manipulation to use my personal life against me, so why did I tell them?

I really act like such a fucking idiot sometimes. I wish I knew how to change that. I shouldn't need something repeated a hundred times for me to learn it.
 
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LONE WOLF.

LONE WOLF.

PUNISHER.
Nov 4, 2020
1,988
It's usually the people who say 'You can trust me' who absolutely cannot be trusted! Anyhoo I send you a hug💐...........🐺
 
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fleetingnight

fleetingnight

incapable of shutting up
May 2, 2024
637
It was somebody I barely know, too. I know I wasn't thinking as much because I was upset, but everyone knows you don't tell people you barely met your personal life shit. Everyone fucking knows that.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,408
I just think it's within us to try and form connections with others. And I suppose, that is one way we do it- being open and vulnerable. I suppose there's always this hope that this time around, it doesn't end up slapping us in the face. I hope it works out better this time for you.
 
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10minutesremaining

10minutesremaining

Member
Jun 29, 2024
16
they just say that to feel like a good person, nobody ever cares if it doesn't benefit them
 
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archiveofpain

archiveofpain

close up the hole in my vein
May 29, 2024
40
I don't think you are an idiot for opening up, we all want to feel heard and understood to some degree though I totally get what you're saying even after you've let your guard down or been let down over and over about people supporting you, when you are in a bad place you still reach out to them anyway because you think anything is better than nothing and you really want to believe that they can be there for you but man if does that hurt when it turns out to be like you expected
 
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