Venting Drinking every night to cope

[SHThrowAway213]

I'm an alcoholic.
I'm tired.
I'm fed up.
I'm bored.
I'm stressed.
This whole virus has thrown me for a tailspin.
I'm used of all this stuff normally.
But now because I have no work, I'm left to my own devices.
My husband is around too, but he doesn't get it.
I drink behind his back.
I'm drinking more then I usually would.
I would usually wait a few days before I would drink.
Not this time.
Drinking every day.
Behind his back, I'm worried of his reaction when he finds out.
Need to stop, but I dont want to.

 

[RedDEE]

Fuck it, stay drunk if that helps you cope.

 

[faust]

I used to drink heavily too and my ex did not know anything.
The reason why I stopped was merely because I became too tired of this.
The cycle was awful itself. Drinking, throwing up/falling asleep, waking up with a headache, waiting till the evening and repeating everything again.
The best thing you can do is to try drinking moderately, because if you drink heavily, you may soon realize that your health is getting worse every time you wake up.

 

[Jumper Geo]

I'm an alcoholic.
I'm tired.
I'm fed up.
I'm bored.
I'm stressed.
This whole virus has thrown me for a tailspin.
I'm used of all this stuff normally.
But now because I have no work, I'm left to my own devices.
My husband is around too, but he doesn't get it.
I drink behind his back.
I'm drinking more then I usually would.
I would usually wait a few days before I would drink.
Not this time.
Drinking every day.
Behind his back, I'm worried of his reaction when he finds out.
Need to stop, but I dont want to.

I gave you a hug as there wasn't a bottle of vodka emoji, lol but I can't condone your behaviour as I swig on my tin of Stella, haha, tbh why not be honest with him, you know he will find out, he probably already knows but doesn't want that confrontation, explain to him being in lock down and depressed, you need the drink to get by, he loves you so hopefully understands

 

[thouisdead]

I'm sorry you're passing through this situation. I knew someone who use to be an alcoholic and did what you're doing now. I've seen his pain. I can't advice you in any way because I'm no the best person, and you're the only one that can choose anything. But something I'd surely do is to give you a hug, even not knowing if it will ever gonna help. ❤

 

[Depressedtoolong]

Doing much the same.

I don't think I'm an alcoholic yet, but I do drink too much. I also don't think this is denial- it doesn't matter whether I am or not at this stage.

 

[s1mplem3]

I'm sorry that you feel so bad. To be honest I started to drink too. Not everyday but 3 times a week. I just drink and cry. I can't wait when I get drunk next time, probably I going to drink everyday and I don't want to stop. I think only this way I can let go all the bad things and cry cause otherwise I'm just numb.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

Thank you so much for your replies.
I wish I could stay drunk 24/7.
My health is already beginning to fail.
Have already been diagnosed with chronic gastritis and now I have a little bit of neuropathy too.
But i just cant bring myself to care.

 

[Fragile]

sorry that you are dealing with this, alcoholism sucks but life seems so easy when you are drunk, it's really hard to drink moderately when you have nothing else.

i'm doing the same but with pills like benzos and gabapentinoids, then i add some weed and alcohol if i start to feel sober. sobriety is something that i can't handle and it's not even because of the crisis that the world is going through right now. life just sucks in general and there's nothing else that drowns the pain.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Have already been diagnosed with chronic gastritis and now I have a little bit of neuropathy too.

Ex(!) alcoholic here, been through all that. I know what it's like when booze is the only answer. It fixes everything. Instantly. But only for a short time, then everything gets worse. You have my heartfelt sympathy.

However, those symptoms, it will get worse. Systemic damage to everything, especially if you are experiencing neuropathy already - I was the same.
Now my bowel doesn't work and my metabolism is screwed. If you feel bad now, you will feel orders of magnitude worse as your body deteriorates. And the alcohol will stop working too as tolerance effects progress. And then eventually, when you actually have no other option but to quit, withdrawl will be horrific.

And there will come a point when you have no option but to stop, as it won't be helping anymore and you body will start to reject the alcohol. When your liver starts to hurt, you won't actually want to drink anymore, your body won't let you. At least that's how it was with me. I lost all desire for booze even though my body still craved it.

I'm sorry to tell a horror story, but I've been through this and it has destroyed my life, utterly. It's why I'm here. I'm sure it's not what you want to hear, but unfortunately, that's the reality of the situation.

I don't have any clever solutions or alternatives and I understand why the booze is so tempting, because it does really help in the short term, but I promise you, the medium to long term effects are hideous beyond imagining.

As ever, I can only speak to my personal experience. What you do is your choice. But that is how things progressed with me and even though I would love a drink right now, I seriously wish I'd never ever touched a drop of alcohol my entire life.

And even now, I'm tempted to buy some booze, with the lock down and all, it would just be so nice.
But I won't. Not ever again.
The experience I've had and am still having is WAY worse than having to deal with life without alcohol. I can't stress that enough. What I'm going through health wise is many orders of magnitude worse then any mental health issues that I used alcohol to overcome. I'd gladly go back to those days where depression was my only issue, as ridiculous as that sounds.

Good luck and if you do want to chat about anything in private please feel free to send me a PM.

 

[BridgeJumper]

Ued to be an addict. I used everything I could get my hands on to escape reality. Usually tranqulizers and alcohol. Lost count how many times I spent sleeping under bridges, utterly smashed at only 8 am, ruining everything I started due to my addiction.
I think Im slipping again and the only reason Im not heads deep into it is that my parents are really rigid about the locdown and hardly let me out.
Im growing increasigly fustrated, sitting in my room, sinking into suicidal thoughts, never being talked to by them.
Dont know about any solutions but I empathize

 

[Pan]

I hear you, friend, loudly and clearly. Although I don't drink hard alcohol, I suck down the beers like there's no tomorrow. What's more,I have stopped caring about it.

 

[Hollow Point]

I used to drink 750ml of whiskey a day. Surprised I'm still alive. I only quit because I couldnt afford it, now I try to stay away from it. When you live on the streets, you cant afford to make the dumb decisions alchohol always leads to. Plus I rather buy food lol

 

[Pan]

I used to drink 750ml of whiskey a day. Surprised I'm still alive. I only quit because I couldnt afford it, now I try to stay away from it. When you live on the streets, you cant afford to make the dumb decisions alchohol always leads to. Plus I rather buy food lol

I feel badly, pal, that you are homeless and wish you the best.

 

[Hollow Point]

I feel badly, pal, that you are homeless and wish you the best.

Thanks I wish you the best as well

 

[Antibody246]

Ex(!) alcoholic here, been through all that. I know what it's like when booze is the only answer. It fixes everything. Instantly. But only for a short time, then everything gets worse. You have my heartfelt sympathy.

However, those symptoms, it will get worse. Systemic damage to everything, especially if you are experiencing neuropathy already - I was the same.
Now my bowel doesn't work and my metabolism is screwed. If you feel bad now, you will feel orders of magnitude worse as your body deteriorates. And the alcohol will stop working too as tolerance effects progress. And then eventually, when you actually have no other option but to quit, withdrawl will be horrific.

And there will come a point when you have no option but to stop, as it won't be helping anymore and you body will start to reject the alcohol. When your liver starts to hurt, you won't actually want to drink anymore, your body won't let you. At least that's how it was with me. I lost all desire for booze even though my body still craved it.

I'm sorry to tell a horror story, but I've been through this and it has destroyed my life, utterly. It's why I'm here. I'm sure it's not what you want to hear, but unfortunately, that's the reality of the situation.

I don't have any clever solutions or alternatives and I understand why the booze is so tempting, because it does really help in the short term, but I promise you, the medium to long term effects are hideous beyond imagining.

As ever, I can only speak to my personal experience. What you do is your choice. But that is how things progressed with me and even though I would love a drink right now, I seriously wish I'd never ever touched a drop of alcohol my entire life.

And even now, I'm tempted to buy some booze, with the lock down and all, it would just be so nice.
But I won't. Not ever again.
The experience I've had and am still having is WAY worse than having to deal with life without alcohol. I can't stress that enough. What I'm going through health wise is many orders of magnitude worse then any mental health issues that I used alcohol to overcome. I'd gladly go back to those days where depression was my only issue, as ridiculous as that sounds.

Good luck and if you do want to chat about anything in private please feel free to send me a PM.

One can drink himself to death.

another possible scenario: "On September 25 1980, Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham died after drinking over one liter of vodka. He died choking on his own vomit. He was 32 years old."

There was also some post about guy ctb by alcohol end stage process:
"
"I saw him he had holed himself up in his flat with ~80 1.25L bottles
whiskey; two weeks later i saw him severely jaundiced and looking deathly; a week later he was dead rip MR"

Nicolas cage in the movie "Leaving las vegas" drank himself to death. I wonder how painful and long this is if one already suffer from liver problems.

 

[faust]

One can drink himself to death.

another possible scenario: "On September 25 1980, Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham died after drinking over one liter of vodka. He died choking on his own vomit. He was 32 years old."

There was also some post about guy ctb by alcohol end stage process:
"
"I saw him he had holed himself up in his flat with ~80 1.25L bottles
whiskey; two weeks later i saw him severely jaundiced and looking deathly; a week later he was dead rip MR"

Nicolas cage in the movie "Leaving las vegas" drank himself to death. I wonder how painful and long this is if one already suffer from liver problems.

This guy seems okay drinking 3 bottles :D

Warning! Video not for people with weak stomachs!

 

[TimeToBiteTheDust]

I stopped drinking alcohol daily because it wasn't useful. Only helpt me to distract myself but next the day I still had same problems. It didn't solve anything. I only drink beer but only on weekends because I like it. My life sucks anyway with or without alcohol.

 

[LMLN]

When I start drinking daily it feels good for the time I'm drinking. But the next morning I'm very very depressed. Much more than if I did not drink. It's something I struggle with since I just need a break from emotional pain, and drinking makes me numb.
I try to avoid it. But it's very difficult.

 

[Jumper Geo]

This guy seems okay drinking 3 bottles :D

Warning! Video not for people with weak stomachs!

Amature, I do this every Friday night he forgot to take his Antiemetics first, only joking

 

[faust]

Amature, I do this every Friday night he forgot to take his Antiemetics first, only joking

Aaaaaaaa, I imagine what could happen then...

 

[Jumper Geo]

Aaaaaaaa, I imagine what could happen then...

It would be two things either a peaceful ctb or wake up answering some really difficult to answer questions to the Police force,

 

[faust]

It would be two things either a peaceful ctb or wake up answering some really difficult to answer questions to the Police force,

Meto can make alco absorb better and at the same time can make very drowsy... But that is in theory. More likely it will be throwing up as far as you can.

 

[Kumachan]

i wonder if that russian guy in the video took his antiemetics, would it stopped him from throwing up? I almost barfed just by looking at him fuck...

 

[a.n.kirillov]

I'm an alcoholic.
I'm tired.
I'm fed up.
I'm bored.
I'm stressed.
This whole virus has thrown me for a tailspin.
I'm used of all this stuff normally.
But now because I have no work, I'm left to my own devices.
My husband is around too, but he doesn't get it.
I drink behind his back.
I'm drinking more then I usually would.
I would usually wait a few days before I would drink.
Not this time.
Drinking every day.
Behind his back, I'm worried of his reaction when he finds out.
Need to stop, but I dont want to.

I'm sorry, I know the struggle (and the allure).

There's a pretty high chance your husband knows it - addicts don't think straight - I know it from myself and from family members. They think no one will notice, all the while it is glaringly obvious to everyone around them.

 

[tom90]

I'm also doing the same but I don't consider myself alcoholic. But maybe if I am, who cares. Either way I don't care. If I can work during the day it's fine by me. What's the worst thing that could happen? Maybe die from liver failure? Hahaha

 

[Aonewayticketplease]

Yeah, I cannot face the world untranquilised. Sometimes I start drinking at 9AM.

IMHO sometimes alcohol really does help, good luck to you with that.

 

[muffin222]

I'm so sorry life is so unbearable for you

I'm not an alcoholic, but I used to heavily smoke pot everyday to numb my emotions and make it through the day, so I understand that need to escape your reality. It's not an easy situation by any means. If you feel you want to stop, there are many resources available even online to help you take that first step.
I understand completely that need to escape

 

[whereispeace]

I used to self-medicate with alcohol and other things...for a while it seemed to work, but eventually it turned on me. I don't even enjoy it anymore.