![bitofftoomuch](/data/avatars/l/95/95592.jpg?1720288914)
bitofftoomuch
hold onto those who accept your messy self
- Jul 1, 2024
- 38
It's like, at a certain point of depression I just hate everything and ctb isn't exempt. I can't describe this as "feeling better" because if anything I feel worse. ctb feels stupid the longer i think about it. The longer I think about it the more I'm convinced it's just a waste of time. You would think that means i've got some plan for life and recovery right? Not so in my case. I just can't let go of wanting stuff I'll never have. I cross my fingers hoping some freak accident will unalive me, or that some crazy windfall of good fortune will make me enjoy life again. I'm simply too exhausted for recovery OR ctb; I want someone or something to take the decision out of my hands.