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RileyTanaka

RileyTanaka

ill / failure
Mar 20, 2020
264
Does anyone here believe in God? Did anyone here used to believe in the Christian God?

If so, how do you reconcile your beliefs with the suffering that you experience which has brought you here? Many here wrestle with the question of what happens after death, but not many discuss their relationship to a higher power in the context of suicide. If you are here, it is very likely that any prior belief in a God is at least compromised now, but for some, it may be a mitigating factor for actually going through with it.

I would love to hear from any Christians on the board. Please be kind, non-judgemental, and allow open discussion. It's easy to be dismissive as so many of us here are atheists, agnostics, or devoid of spiritual belief in general. Thanks.
 
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GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
I grew up catholic in a catholic country so it was a big part of my childhood. At 16 I realized that a lot of what was said in mass was ridiculous so I stopped going, but I still kept believing in god , if that makes sense.

I don't think about god as something that can stop suffering, like when people say " why would god let this shit happen," ... because humans have free will for the most part, they make things happen

It's evolved over the years to be more a broader spiritual belief, there's more to it than our little planet. I could ramble on... but really I've had enough spiritual experiences in my life that ill never not believe in something.

Religion had a big part in my life, some of it was wholesome but a lot was negative. Teaching young kids about hell is just plain wrong, most people I meet in psych hospital are going through some demented religious bullshit that I'm sure is from our upbringing. And don't get me started on the catholic priests who ruined so many lives.

Sorry this long, for me there is a big difference between God/s and religions.
 
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D

Desky

Member
May 15, 2020
35
This is something I struggle with having been born to an Irish Catholic-Jewish family mix. It's like we like to drink and save money at the same time... Bdmmm tsss bad joke lol...

Anyway.. through years of social conditioning from prayer and religious community at a young age.. or a chemical wiring geared towards also believing in a god has made it easier to hold some belief concerning a higher power. Even if just conceptual or fake altogether, there is some innate pull towards seeing the beauty of life, outerspace, looking at how our brain's can compute and produce ideas, a cool looking plant, the way everything is connected in some indirect way, ... and attributing this beauty of design to some mass power that created the governing laws for everything to exist.

Call it god, nature, chain reaction over an unfathomable amount of time, or nothing of beauty at all. What we believe is just a model to try and understand what is actually real beyond our minds. That model says more about the person than sometimes the truth, in my opinion. If believing in god helps you connect with others or has some positive effect than I'm all for others doing that. I personally believe in a powerful Universe of exchanges with high intelligence beyond our reach controlling many factors that we can use for our own favor. A little bit like the matrix.

One thing I have found from using legal psychedelics reinforces this sense of a higher intelligence which is always listening. Could be a romantic thing that I want to be true but believing in something has helped me perform and feel better.
 
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T

TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,321
No. I don't even believe in myself, why believe in someone who I'm not sure if it exists.
 
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T

Tharik77

Member
Apr 24, 2020
29
there are many idiots here, unfortunately
 
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E

Epsilon0

Enlightened
Dec 28, 2019
1,874
there are many idiots here, unfortunately


Nothing could be farther from the truth.

Faith is a beautiful gift because it gives you solace and meaning. Those who truly believe are blessed!
 
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enjolras

enjolras

Dead are useless if not to love the living more
Feb 13, 2020
1,293
Not yet but maybe later. Holding on for the conviction to evolve.

3CEEFAEF D1C7 46D0 92EF 00F96CB61439

(Ok I lie. But I'm not insensitive to spirituality)
 
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GoBack

GoBack

Paragon
Apr 25, 2020
997
Nothing could be farther from the truth.

Faith is a beautiful gift because it gives you solace and meaning. Those who truly believe are blessed!


It is. I wish I still had it like before, it made it possible to handle stuff that I can't handle anymore.

If that made me an idiot then I was a much stronger idiot than I am now
 
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Weightoftheworld

Weightoftheworld

Let me burn.
Apr 19, 2020
258
I grew up in a baptist family, I even live in the Bible Belt in the US. I've never believed in god though. Not even as a kid when I went to church. It's amazing for those who can find comfort in believing, I just can't force myself to.
 
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B

blalost

Member
May 12, 2020
36
Nothing could be farther from the truth.

Faith is a beautiful gift because it gives you solace and meaning. Those who truly believe are blessed!
Ignorance is bliss.
 
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E

Epsilon0

Enlightened
Dec 28, 2019
1,874
@GoodPersonEffed

This is your cue. Post the photo!
 
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W

WhatIsMyLife

Experienced
Apr 22, 2020
227
I do. I'm Catholic. I know that suicide is considered a sin... If I end up going to Hell, I know it can't be worse than continuing on living... For me at least.
 
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DyslexicForeigner

DyslexicForeigner

Student
Dec 27, 2018
135
Does anyone here believe in God? Did anyone here used to believe in the Christian God?

If so, how do you reconcile your beliefs with the suffering that you experience which has brought you here? Many here wrestle with the question of what happens after death, but not many discuss their relationship to a higher power in the context of suicide. If you are here, it is very likely that any prior belief in a God is at least compromised now, but for some, it may be a mitigating factor for actually going through with it.

I would love to hear from any Christians on the board. Please be kind, non-judgemental, and allow open discussion, please. It's easy to be dismissive as so many of us here are atheists, agnostics, or devoid of spiritual belief in general. Thanks.

I'm so sorry @RileyTanaka ... the Christian God that you refers to is currently sick and has been bedridden since December last year and it's because of unintentional Mr. Jesus infectious spits hit it's face!

*Cough! Cough! Cough!*
 
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Jumper Geo

Jumper Geo

Life's a bitch and then you die.
Feb 23, 2020
2,910
I was brought up RC and my mother is Irish, so I went to a school taught by nuns some was really nice and others evil, but learning the bible i believed in it.
So as a witty, inquisitive and naughty child, lol. I new I could ruffle the nun's feathers who taught us religeon she wasn't a nice person, asking her questions she will struggle to answer in front of class, like so the reason we are not living in paradise is because of a women called Eve who ate the forbidden apple which doomed us all, when I asked well does that mean women are evil and in league with the devil, followed up with, why are apples really tasty and doctors say they are good for you, shouldn't they be poisonous, was enough to get a good laugh in class and me kicked out to the headmistress office who was a 7ft, 20 stone evil nun.

I don't believe in any of the man made religions according to the bible, God destroyed the Earth with a flood because of the debauchery taking place, we must be 10,00000 time's worse today with what human beings do to one another if this was true we shouldn't be living today.

Saying that I did have an experience as a child it could have been a dream or ET but I never forgot it, a white glowing figure, shape of a person was next to me in bed I sat up like doing a sit up without struggling or straining I didn't talk and just felt so relaxed laid back down and woke up the next morning, I have never experienced anything like that again and I'm late 40's now.

So the jury is still out, but even if there is nothing it doesn't matter we are all going to experience it, would be nice if we all go to a better place and look back and laugh at our Earth experience one day.
 
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C

ceelo

Experienced
May 18, 2020
298
no im a taoist
 
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J

jgm63

Visionary
Oct 28, 2019
2,467
I believe in God.
I believe God is all things (the "good" and the "bad"), and that in truth we all *are* God, if we can connect with the deepest reality of what is inside us, although this is a big undertaking.
Although it can be hard to come to terms with, I believe that suffering is to raise our consciousness, and to "keep us moving", since we are not destined to simply stay as we are or were. Not that this makes suffering any easier.
Change is pain.
However, I believe if you take actions to raise your own consciousness (usually by making various sacrifices in various ways), then life might not need to give you so much pain, and there is a possibility of greater harmony.
This is a *BIG* subject of course, that can't possibly be covered in a small post such as this.
My teacher is Barry Long, who passed in 2003. He has plenty of videos on youtube.
 
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K

Kumachan

Specialist
Mar 5, 2020
396
humans have free will for the most part, they make things happen
You either have free will or you dont. Where do you draw this line? This discussion about God must definitely include the notion of so-called "free will" and it simply doesnt seem to be the case.
 
4eyebiped

4eyebiped

Mage
Dec 28, 2019
567
Even as a child I did not believe in God. Everything about the setup just seemed flawed in so many ways. Then as I got older I thought to myself, if there was a God, he is one sadistic and childish bastard.
 
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V

voltage268

Member
May 19, 2019
50
I grew up evangelical and was pretty much 'on fire for god' growing up. It made perfect sense to me at the time the christian story in terms of one person jesus taking on all our sins and bringing final justice and redemption in the end which gave me hope that all injustices would be balanced and that there was a greater good in charge of everything behind the scenes. I wanted to grow up to be an evangelist as I wanted to help save as many people from hell, I had quite a lot of spiritual knowledge and would encourage other christians when I could.

Having cried out to god so many times over the years during episodes of extreme pain growing up, and putting my trust in him, using scriptures to hold him to account in terms of promises (mistaking clinical depression for 'spiritual oppression'), it's gotten to the point that I physically can't actually believe anymore even if I wanted to. It would be so much easier to believe in terms of the hope of a better life, I envy other christians so much but I've been burned so much over decades by my personal experiences and can't tell the difference from what I thought was spiritual compared to what I realise now as mental illness. But, to add extra confusion, I've had 2 separate 'spiritual' experiences at least, one being the baptism of the holy spirit where you experience sudden uncontrollable pure joy and laughter, as crazy as that sounds, which also involved other (sane!) people, and one other darker one which I can mention if anyone gives a toss.

The thing about these experiences is that if you have mentall illness you could chalk it down to your mind playing tricks, but when other (verifiable) people around you experience the same thing, it's a real mind fuck. The experiences were as real to me as slapping me across the face with a fish, I don't know what to make of them, and because of them I'm at the very least agnostic now, something is definitely going on behind the scenes; my heart is still christian in the sense that I would not knowingly reject jesus or the gift of salvation. I don't go to church anymore.

How suicide comes into play regarding a christian background is that it would imply you're not trusting god to be in control of your life to deliver you from the pain, taking things into your own hands, a sin that you can't take back. It's very distressing to come from a strong religious background, I wish I was brought up atheist like most other people in the UK, it's confused and messed me up, I'm always terrified of a hell existing.
 
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sweetness

sweetness

here's hoping, hopeless romantic
May 23, 2020
9
this is probably very rambley so i apologise in advance ! i might have not answered your question at all. i hope everyone reading this has a good day ♡

being a suicidal theist is sort of terrifying, if i'm being honest. i was brought up in an atheist household but the uk makes sure all students learn about religions, so i was absolutely aware of hell and heaven from a young-ish age. had a pretty edgy, nihilist atheist phase when i was about fourteen and then did a complete 180. i blame life of pi. i understand that religion is really dumb - i don't belong to or necessarily 'click' with any of them, though christianity is probably the one i'm most knowledgeable about. but for whatever reason i'm still drawn to believing in a god, even though i feel like absolute hell for most of the day. it's just nicer to believe that there is someone out there that sees you and loves you no matter what, someone who can influence the world in your favour if you pray hard enough. i have plenty of cases where my faith and prayer did not work, but the rare exceptions that proved they did work are enough to keep me coming back, even if it's as pathetic as passing a test or making a friend laugh. i do want to die, but at the same time i also want things to get better. i don't really have the motivation to make things happen myself, so i just hope and pray instead.

to answer your question, i don't really. a perk of not being tied to a specific religion means i'm free to play around with my concept of god. maybe i'll get into heaven, maybe i won't. like whatismylife said, hell might as well be how i'm doing right now. sometimes i like to imagine that this is a bit like hell, or more like a purgatory - my depression is a punishment for whatever my sins are, and this misery is how i'm burning them off. if i do go to hell, maybe i deserve it. something that scares me is the fact that basically all religions say that if you reject their god you go to hell, but polytheism is similarly loathed. whether i move towards one religion, embrace them all or abstain, i'm screwed. i try not to think about that too much. i don't believe that all life is sacred. i'm sure there are plenty of religious people who have killed themselves, certain that they'll enter heaven, no matter what their holy book says.
religion is a coping mechanism for me. it doesn't make sense, but religion as a whole isn't meant to make sense. if i try to be sensible and logical about this stuff, i'll just feel worse for it. i'd much rather face 'this' with rose-coloured glasses.
 
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kaz

kaz

Member
Apr 22, 2020
42
god doesn't exist, but if he does, he must be a sadistic bastard
 
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alizee

alizee

Arcanist
Jul 22, 2018
451
I grew up catholic in the sense of being forced to attend church as a kid. The belief that people have free will is incorrect because free will is just an illusion. Thus, it doesn't make sense to be worried about how you or anyone dies.

I'm agnostic for context and I always have been even when as a child. Being forced to attend church makes me somewhat understand the thought process of being afraid of how you die if you believe what the bible has written but once again it doesn't make sense if you understand how people really don't have control over their fate.
 
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A

AcornUnderground

Mage
Feb 28, 2020
505
I don't believe, but I have hope. I really want there to be a reason for this life, a continuation of self, and the chance to see loved ones again.
 
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F

Flump

Student
Jan 14, 2020
106
I don't believe, we don't have free will either or we would be allowed to die peacefully when we choose.
 
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YukiFox

YukiFox

Pastel demon
Dec 8, 2018
320
I was raised catholic, but ended in many christian denominations because for conversion therapy (I tried to overcome my homosexuality then). I tried to pray a lot, read the Bible and take all the church departaments (Street evangelism volunteer and that stuff) possible to distract myself to my sexual and romantic desires for men. Well, when I admit that I can't force into bisexuality or heterosexuality, I desist to believe in christianity as spiritual path.
I believe that Yahweh exists. Trinity. one god, it doesn't matter for me anymore. I believe that Yahweh is a god, one of thousands out there. I can't prove their existence, since I have a lot of laziness to catch all logic and philosophical arguments to defend him and all the other gods an goddesses. But I can't serve Yahweh anymore. I refuse the christian doctrine of being so submissive to God and their priests (In any denomination). I don't fear the hell anymore, and when I'll CTB I'll find the peace that the christian faith doesn't give to me.
 
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Blue Portal

Blue Portal

Member
May 6, 2020
66
Does anyone here believe in God? Did anyone here used to believe in the Christian God?


If so, how do you reconcile your beliefs with the suffering that you experience which has brought you here? Many here wrestle with the question of what happens after death, but not many discuss their relationship to a higher power in the context of suicide. If you are here, it is very likely that any prior belief in a God is at least compromised now, but for some, it may be a mitigating factor for actually going through with it.


I would love to hear from any Christians on the board. Please be kind, non-judgemental, and allow open discussion. It's easy to be dismissive as so many of us here are atheists, agnostics, or devoid of spiritual belief in general. Thanks.
I use to be a fundamentalist Christian. Meaning I took the Bible very literal and real. Then I got a really bad health condition and I questioned then I started questioning everything. I started reading everything I could about other religions, about near death experiences, astral projection, out of body experiences, meditation, kundalini, chi, karma, reincarnation, etc then became a univeralist with a Christian leaning. And have stayed that way ever since.

In a nutshell the Bible doesn't directly condemn suicide. Judas doesn't count because he betrayed jesus. "Thou shalt not kill" in the KJV is a mistranslation. Every other translation is "you should not murder" it could be argued that Jesus committed suicide because he knowing came here to die on a cross. Thus his killing was a suicide. Not only that but the father God endorsed it.

Jesus actually says reincarnation is real.


Besides reincarnation fixes a lot of the problems with justice in the bible. It makes God a hell of a lot more rightous. Many near death experieners report believing in reincarnation too.

I still believe in hell too just not the christian hell.

So in a nutshell suicide is just a transition from one dimension to another. There is no judement after you die. However your karma does follow you. If we get to choose when to make life in good timming then we can choose when to end it in good timing.

I'll be happy to answer any questions.
 
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A

AcornUnderground

Mage
Feb 28, 2020
505
I use to be a fundamentalist Christian. Meaning I took the Bible very literal and real. Then I got a really bad health condition and I questioned then I started questioning everything. I started reading everything I could about other religions, about near death experiences, astral projection, out of body experiences, meditation, kundalini, chi, karma, reincarnation, etc then became a univeralist with a Christian leaning. And have stayed that way ever since.

In a nutshell the Bible doesn't directly condemn suicide. Judas doesn't count because he betrayed jesus. "Thou shalt not kill" in the KJV is a mistranslation. Every other translation is "you should not murder" it could be argued that Jesus committed suicide because he knowing came here to die on a cross. Thus his killing was a suicide. Not only that but the father God endorsed it.

Jesus actually says reincarnation is real.


Besides reincarnation fixes a lot of the problems with justice in the bible. It makes God a hell of a lot more rightous. Many near death experieners report believing in reincarnation too.

I still believe in hell too just not the christian hell.

So in a nutshell suicide is just a transition from one dimension to another. There is no judement after you die. However your karma does follow you. If we get to choose when to make life in good timming then we can choose when to end it in good timing.

I'll be happy to answer any questions.
Now does suicide fare in this scenario?
 
Lost.

Lost.

Antidepressants and antipsychotics are posion
Feb 13, 2020
173
I was Chatolic when i was younger but i don't belive in God anymore.
 
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jrums

jrums

Student
Apr 14, 2019
134
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