Discussion Does anyone else try to convince themselves that suicide is a good/positive thing to get rid of SI?

[VegasLyra]

My SI prevents me from going through with hanging so beforehand I have to get myself in the mood to do it.

Idk if this is weird but I've found the best way is to listen to cheerful music and pretend that if I go through with it, I won't die, but instead I'll get to be reincarnated and live a happy life.

Obviously that's just me coping and trying to trick my brain to go through with it but it works! Does anyone else do this?

 

[WornOutLife]

Yes, I do it all the time but the only effective way to supress my SI is by drinking lots of alcohol while taking sleeping pills.

 

[motel rooms]

Constant aches & pains have already convinced me that suicide is a good thing

 

[FuneralCry]

For me I am already convinced that suicide is a good thing. The thing I am worried about is trying an attempt and my brain sending me signals to not go through with it. I may want to die but my brain simply wont let me. I honestly think I have a weak SI.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

I may want to die but my brain simply wont let me. I honestly think I have a weak SI.

People with weak SI already killed themselves. They don't sign up for websites like this or do months of research on ctb methods. They just grab whatever is near them and find a way to ctb. Everyone here probably has a strong SI.

That is why when I hear of a celebrity suicide I think that this person has a very strong will. Even with all the trappings of money, fame, glory, etc they were able to ctb. That must take extraordinary will power.

 

[Weary Soul]

Yep. And my reason for this is because I believe SI is nothing more than a genetic imprint to procreate and ensure survival of a species (just like non-human animals have SI) - so if by dying I can kick SI in the butt... all the better.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

Yep. And my reason for this is because I believe SI is nothing more than a genetic imprint to procreate and ensure survival of a species (just like non-human animals have SI) - so if by dying I can kick SI in the butt... all the better.

I agree but that would mean we are a product of generations of selective genes with strong SI. Maybe that is why CTB is harder than it needs to be.

 

[Weary Soul]

Exactly!

 

[Alec]

Yes, I have ctb on my mind all the time every day and I try to keep telling myself that it's a good thing so that I don't feel scared of it or even sad. Even though it makes me feel better about everything to think about ctb it also makes me feel sad I guess, I try to think about how it's not a bad thing to ctb.

 

[Wrennie]

People with weak SI already killed themselves. They don't sign up for websites like this or do months of research on ctb methods. They just grab whatever is near them and find a way to ctb. Everyone here probably has a strong SI.

That is why when I hear of a celebrity suicide I think that this person has a very strong will. Even with all the trappings of money, fame, glory, etc they were able to ctb. That must take extraordinary will power.

For the most part I agree, but It's also the fact that many of us on here would prefer a more 'peaceful' method of ending things, which unfortunately takes more time and effort to acquire. The only reason I'm still here is that I want to obtain N without risking legally implicating my family, which requires me to move to a new address, and I have to teach myself Bitcoin from scratch, etc.
it's a long and arduous process, but I'm certain that if I had N in my possession at this very moment I'd be quite likely to down it.