Does anyone else think that when you ctb people close to you will feel relief?

[Deleted member 31858]

Does anyone else think that when you ctb people close to you will feel relief? maybe sad but deep down they will feel that a weight has been lifted from them and soon they will be happy again. I think that in my case it is, and sometimes my SI makes me think otherwise, every day it is more difficult to live for me and the best thing is to do it as quickly as possible, how can I avoid this kind of SI?

 

[Insomniac]

100%

 

[noname223]

I rather don't think like this. I rather think my family would be quite sad. I hope I don't traumatize them.

 

[Julgran]

You are probably right.

Knowing and worrying for a suicidal person is probably worse than the grief that follows after a successful suicide attempt.

 

[ineverlived]

only my father and mom. others will be surprised, but I don't think they will be too upset. It's a big problem for me to upset my parents. but recently a close friend of my mother died, she mourned for 2-3 days, but after a while she forgot. Of course, it's not the same as losing your child, but I hope it will be like that after my death. Whoever you are, no matter how loved you are, life will go on somehow. (i hope).

 

[Gaga786]

For sure!! I can just imagine everyone celebrating my death by having a huge feast. All of my bullies and people that have hurt me would surely be invited. I can just imagine how happy people would feel when the loser, nuisance and parasite is sucked out of their lives

 

[Yavannah]

100%
thats what i tell myself too

 

[noname223]

You are probably right.

Knowing and worrying for a suicidal person is probably worse than the grief that follows after a successful suicide attempt.

Personally I doubt that a lot. But that is just my opinion.

 

[outrider567]

No, my step-mother(who's known me 46 years) and female cousin(who's known me all my life)will not feel relief when I CTB, they will be in shock

 

[Lily (Osako)]

I think most people wont care one way or another, a few will just say it was weak of me, and the last couple might feel a mixture of sadness and relief.

 

[want2dienow]

yes he tells me to just do it while SH. im very annoyance, with all my chronic of course. but i stay in my place. he tells they were right i am just a

 

[WhatPowerIs]

Once the grief stage passes I think they might realize how much better their lives will be without me since I burdened them (my family) for so long.

 

[Shu]

I don't think so. I think they will be devastated.

 

[FinalFrontier]

A mixture of relief and devastation I'm sure. I have been a burden far to long for there not to be a sense of relief from the constant worrying. All I can hope for is no one follows as a result.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

I think my mother should feel relief but in reality no she probably wont see it like that.

 

[outatime_85]

I was written off as a mistake a long time ago, so all my family is doing is just waiting for the call telling them my demons won, so they can make the arrangements.

I highly doubt any of them will be devastated or upset over my demise.

They might feel some peace and relief since they would no longer have to pretend to care.

 

[Guend]

I think it will be traumatic for my family and for some people. But also a relief for others

 

[TheDoomedDoomer]

At first I think the grief will set in hard for my mom and possibly my brother. But the thing is they know why I feel the way I do and that just don't care. They don't want me to leave and have tried to stop me in the past but also they don't want me around cause of how I am. I think it'll be tough at first but after a few months maybe a year it'll be a lot easier on them. It'll probably feel like I wasn't ever there to begin with and they'll just pretend I didn't exist and never discuss me cause of how troubled I was.

 

[Coffeebean77]

My family will be shaken, but at the same time I feel like an emotional burden on my mom. They've also had warnings because of my previous attempts. I may be rationalizing but those are true.

 

[Xocoyotzin]

I'm afraid of how it would affect my mother
I think on a deep primal level it might leave an irreparable wound
but I also believe she would secretly be relieved, maybe even glad, and I hope that reason would win over instinct
I've willingly been a burden on her for so long and it's incredibly wrong
ironically not wanting to affect her was the reason I've been holding off for so long but that was a mistake, even if it's painful it would've been the right thing to do and that becomes more clear with time
I'm hoping it will be a long exhale and a celebration for everyone, I can't think of anyone for whom it wouldn't
I'm tired of being that person too

 

[sleepyhollow]

This thought has crossed my mind on numerous occations, and when my parents say unintentionally hurtful things, I use it to justify my sui**dal ideations. They tell me that they love me often, but sometimes I wonder if they only say that because they are good people, and they want to make me feel loved even though they don't actually love me, if you know what I mean. I know that these are really sick patterns of thought, tho, so I try to push them away. It's not fair to my parents to assume that they couldn't love me . Truthfully, I only stay because I have younger siblings and parents, and I know it would be so traumatic for them to lose me, even though I can't understand how or why they could care so much. Somehow they love me, even though I can't seem to love myself. A lot of peope in this world don't even have parents who love them like mine do. Knowing that, I feel so ashamed for wanting to die, and it makes me hate myself even more.

 

[Vesiira]

i think they'll be hurt, sad, confused. they will wonder why i didn't just hold on. some people in my life will understand, the ones that have tried to CTB also. they'll understand all i wanted was peace from the hurt. the only thing that keeps me here is the guilt i feel now for thinking of putting them through that. i hate that. it frustrates me. i know i will do it eventually. probably sooner rather than later. it just feels inevitable.

 

[username8888]

Yes. My family would be relieved.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Not really because my family and friends don't know how bad I feel. The one person that does have to put up with my negativity will have gone by then- I'm waiting for them to go first. It's hard to know how people would feel. I'm pretty estranged from everyone but I guess- trying to picture it myself- it would still affect me if I found out a long lost friend had CTB.

 

[notevenhere]

they've already seen it coming.

they'll probably stop holding their breaths and be like, "finally."