Discussion Does anyone else have a countdown?

[Bulletwbttrflywings]

I feel like I have a countdown... my kids are teens, youngest is 12, and dog is 7. By the time the youngest is out of the house my dog will be gone too. They will be upset, yes, but I won't have to worry so much for taking care of them or my dog.

Yes I know every child needs their parents, but I just don't want to struggle with this pain anymore. I plan on making it look like an accident or foul play... so they don't feel quite so bad. Plus they have their dad and stepmom - and their large family.

Yes I know things can change, but I'm also very much not on the optimistic side of that given my history.

I just want to know I'm not alone in this long journey on this countdown... anyone?

 

[Faraway1990]

I don't have a family and the only person that's ever meant anything to me (13+ years of being there for each other) has gone from me so unless things drastically change soon my countdown is sooner rather than later.

 

[not_a_robot]

there are a few legal cases I'm waiting to see the outcome of. That will affect how much longer I can go. But even if I'm awarded significant cash, I will have to worry about other vultures coming after it. The money could make my situation worse.

And every child definitely doesn't need their parents. The world is full of parents that kids would
be better off without. Not you, I just hate hearing that stereotype because it is SUCH a lie.

 

[PatKat]

I feel like I have a countdown... my kids are teens, youngest is 12, and dog is 7. By the time the youngest is out of the house my dog will be gone too. They will be upset, yes, but I won't have to worry so much for taking care of them or my dog.

Yes I know every child needs their parents, but I just don't want to struggle with this pain anymore. I plan on making it look like an accident or foul play... so they don't feel quite so bad. Plus they have their dad and stepmom - and their large family.

Yes I know things can change, but I'm also very much not on the optimistic side of that given my history.

I just want to know I'm not alone in this long journey on this countdown... anyone?

I'm sorry you feel that way it is hard I know. I have something like a countdown I suppose. I just have to avoid impulse and that can be tricky sometimes. I am currently not actively suicidal, but that changes throughout the days sometimes. I dont know it's hard to explain.

 

[NoYam88]

I have a date tattooed on my wrist, 15.11.34, this will be my last birthday. When ever I get a feeling that the world is going against me, or I'm having a terrible problem in life, I just look at my wrist and it always re assure and reminds me that I have my life by my hands and I can take it at the right time.

 

[andy69]

I plan to do it before October. Before I turn fifty.

 

[Imgonnahangmyself]

Well I turn 20 in a couple months, I don't know whether to do it before I turn 20 or after. Either way I'm definitely gonna do it before New Years. So 1999-2019

 

[Superfluous]

My countdown has been money-related. I reached my final destination today and believe it will be within the next 6-8 days.

 

[Bulletwbttrflywings]

I'm sorry you feel that way it is hard I know. I have something like a countdown I suppose. I just have to avoid impulse and that can be tricky sometimes. I am currently not actively suicidal, but that changes throughout the days sometimes. I dont know it's hard to explain.

I can completely agree with that feeling. It feels good to have others who understand that feeling.

Maybe it's because I know I can't do it now, maybe it's because I'm not getting the "right" help, but I don't feel so alone. Thank you for sharing.

Well I turn 20 in a couple months, I don't know whether to do it before I turn 20 or after. Either way I'm definitely gonna do it before New Years. So 1999-2019

Hugs...

I plan to do it before October. Before I turn fifty.

Hugs...

 

[intheend]

I hope that I will be quite sure on which method I will use before the end of the summer. May this be my last year..