I really don't want to be found and I am conscious that I may shout for help. For these reasons I will either do it at my father and his wife's house or at this guest house I am thinking of renting. I feel this is outrageous. Either my father and his wife's house will always be a reminder of suicide for them or this lady will always be reminded when she looks down her drive and sees her guest house. They may well move. However if I go ahead with it, these are still the places I will do it as I can't risk being heard or found. Is anyone else upset about where they may do it?
emgrl
Mage
- Aug 6, 2022
- 575
I feel bad. I was thinking about going to a hotel, so as to not screw over my landlord. But, I live alone. It's the safest most comfortable place I have access to. I know I won't be found, and I think my anxiety will be less since I'm familiar here, and won't feel like panicking about something I might have forgotten or wish I had doneā¦ it's all so hard 
Depending on your method of choice, you could do it outdoors. N, SN, hanging and the night-night method would probably work fine in a forest or similar place.
Make sure you leave your phone at home, so that you don't use it to call for help.
Fadeawaaaay
Visionary
- Nov 12, 2021
- 2,160
It would be very cruel to my landlord but it would certainly be the easiest and most comfortableā¦
Maybe it would be fairer to do it at my father and his wife's house than the guesthouse. At least that's more normal. The woman I was thinking of renting the guesthouse from lives up the driveway-the guesthouse is at the bottom of the driveway. Her beautiful guesthouse and possibly her house in general will always be ruined for her. My family don't care about me and have wronged me terribly by not believing me about medical trauma when it happened to them too. Maybe it would (for want of a better term) be fairer to do it to them rather than her. That sounds awful but maybe it would. I don't think I can do it outside. I would be afraid I may shout. There's another person with a semi detached house, but again I would be worried about noise. Would a semi detached house be ok? I'm not sure I can wait until my father and his wife go on a trip in October.
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 37,468
Everyone has to die somewhere, someday. It's inevitable for us all. I just think the problem is the society that makes suicide so stigmatised. If people could be open about their plans in advance without the fear of others interfering, then others wouldn't have the shock of finding a body. One of my biggest fears would always be somehow getting interrupted by someone else as I attempt ctb and the attempt fails. I just hate how we live in a world where planning our deaths are so unnecessarily difficult and complicated.
1000winds
Student
- Jul 24, 2022
- 152
im going to do it in a guesthouse and i feel terrible for whoever will find me. but its better than doing it at home because i might be rescued.
I might do it too. You mean one of those little buildings at the end of someone's driveway right? They will probably destroy the guesthouse and sell the house. I would be called selfish by my family...who wouldn't really care but still, on this one they would have more than a point. I know what you mean- I just don't want to be rescued or shout for help. It's hard planning this but for me planning life is harder so I think I know what direction I'm going in.
1000winds
Student
- Jul 24, 2022
- 152
in my country guest houses are like a private home exclusively used for lodging. its not attached to anyones drive way but still, i'm sure whoever finds me is going to be traumatised. i'd ctb in the forest but i want my body to be found so that my family can have some closure.
locked*n*loaded
Archangel
- Apr 15, 2022
- 7,260
I'm going to do it at my home in my garage. The way I have it planned, the cops will be the ones to find me. the thing about life is that it is out of my control how people react to whatever someone else does. Same for CTB. I can only control what I do. How someone reacts to my CTB isn't something I can control. It's a harsh truth, but true nonetheless. People get over things in time, mostly, maybe with the exception of parents whose kids were murdered. People eventually move on. CTB is about what's best for you. I can understand the guilt one would have regarding how others may react to it. I think people who actually go through with CTB have gotten past that guilt.
ever so lonely
terry joseph williams
- Apr 17, 2022
- 282
no really man, in my case it has been the people in my life that have pushed me there, whether it is invalidating me, ghosting me, being shitty towards me for no apparent reason or just being hostile towards me, i have gone off people since the covid pandemic, i think there are nice people out there but i always seem to meet the bad folks or people who try to take advantage, so i don't mind if they see my decomposing corpse, karma works in myseterious ways lol, but i certainly wont be sorry for the trauma i cause to others, it took me years to realise the source of my frustrations and pain was for the most part *others* hope you find peace my bro in whatever you decide
farakini
True Love of the Purest Kindš¤
- Oct 31, 2021
- 103
I only feel bad about being found by familyā¦.as for the actā¦.nope. I've been wanting to die since I was a kid and I'm almost 30ā¦I held on long enough. Not a day goes by without the thought of ctb.
Sn. Good old survival instinct.
hurtbox
Member
- Sep 25, 2022
- 26
Nope, the people that manage my uni accommodation are racist bastards that are running this place at an absolute minimum. I do feel abit shitty about my neighbors but this is the best place i have for ctb.
ojinzo
Specialist
- Feb 21, 2022
- 304
If you care about your dad and step mom, I wouldn't do it there. It's so funny you posted this because I was at my sister's place this weekend in her guest room which is isolated and sound proof. Each night I thought how perfect this room was to ctb but I can't put her through the agony of finding me/ knowing i ctb I'm her house. I love her too much.
My family don't really care about me so that makes my situation a little different but I do know what you mean. However I really do need to move forward with this x
ojinzo
Specialist
- Feb 21, 2022
- 304
makethepainstop
Visionary
- Sep 16, 2022
- 2,032
S
Sometimes necessity is a real mother. I expect most folks would be only limited by their abilities and circumstances. I
I'm in the process of saving up for a vehicle specifically for this purpose. I currently work at a hotel, and just can't imagine leaving such a mess for these lovely ladies to deal with. That, and my method choices are too dangerous for use near others.
As a quick note, I used to consider using a hotel also until I started working at one. The housekeepers are sweet hispanic ladies who already have to clean up messes fit for nightmares. They barely earn enough to get by, and have really hard lives to begin with. I wouldn't want to make it worse for them, and would encourage you all to carefully consider your place of departure.
As a quick note, I used to consider using a hotel also until I started working at one. The housekeepers are sweet hispanic ladies who already have to clean up messes fit for nightmares. They barely earn enough to get by, and have really hard lives to begin with. I wouldn't want to make it worse for them, and would encourage you all to carefully consider your place of departure.
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I rented a hotel room and then didn't go. I'd become terrified before. Then I thought to myself that if I shout for help in a hotel room I am screwed but if I'm in a house I have a much better chance of no one hearing. The only thing at my father and his wife's house is that the door opens from the inside really easy unlike a lot of other homes which require you to find your keys. It has a turn lock instead. This may make it a little easy for me to deliriously leave the house to look for help. Still evaluating but a lot of this is becoming about necessity. This is my dad's wife's home she raised her kid's in yeah, I don't feel great about this. But I have been treated like s**t so maybe I shouldn't care as much as I do.
Al0neAlwayz
In the end, it doesn't even matter...
- Sep 10, 2022
- 65
I feel bad about ctb where I live but I have no alternative. Cannot travel or get hotel room. I'm in a situation that restricts my activities and the freedom to go places so I have no choice. I would prefer to go somewhere secluded where I won't be found, and do it there.
My preference is a hotel room. I really don't want to be found by a family member. It will be a shock by itself. And a hotel is idea for hangings. You can choose not to be disturbed and therefore not found by anyone will you are gone.
I'm planning to do it in my apartment and lie down on my bed after taking SN. I feel bad because 1) the juices from my corpse will severely mess up my bed, and my landlord won't be very happy about that (the apartment was furnished when I got it), 2) my death could bring bad publicity for the leasing company, even though they already have terrible publicity to begin with, and 3) in order to prevent myself from getting help I'll have to block my door with a bunch of boxes and heavy stuff which will make it hard for the authorities to enter my room and deal with my corpse. However, I'm not going to let that stop me from ctb, as it's not my fault that the right to die isn't legal. If we had the right to die, this wouldn't have to happen. Prolifers can't have their cake and eat it too. If they don't want us to mess up their property, they should let us get euthanasia with medical assistance in a medical building.
avoid_slow_death
Ready to embrace the peaceful bliss of the void.
- Feb 4, 2020
- 1,234
Not really because I will be doing it very late at night in a public place that is very special to me. Nobody will likely bother me because it's highly unlikely anyone will be there for hours. Even if they do they will likely assume I am homeless or passed out drunk and ignore me.
As far as not causing trauma to the person who will discover your body, I suggest to send a scheduled message to the police just before you catch the bus.
In case of failure, of course you may still cancel the message.
In case of failure, of course you may still cancel the message.
jellyfish
Success!
- Feb 28, 2023
- 5
I've thought a lot about this and I still have no idea what would be best. After my first suicide attempt, I was taken to the hospital and then taken right back home after getting stitches. Everything was clean, so I assumed that they dealt with that.
Off topic, but imagine attempting suicide and then being taken back home where you live ALONE on the same night? Brilliance. To be fair I was high as a kite and having a great time!
Right, point of story, a few years later my friend said to me jokingly "I may be willing to clean your blood out of a bathtub, but I will not change your diapers!". I had NO IDEA she was the one who did that! This changed everything, I don't have a clue where I'd do it that would cause the least trauma to other people. Goddamn I feel so bad for her
Off topic, but imagine attempting suicide and then being taken back home where you live ALONE on the same night? Brilliance. To be fair I was high as a kite and having a great time!
Right, point of story, a few years later my friend said to me jokingly "I may be willing to clean your blood out of a bathtub, but I will not change your diapers!". I had NO IDEA she was the one who did that! This changed everything, I don't have a clue where I'd do it that would cause the least trauma to other people. Goddamn I feel so bad for her
I'm looking at a hotel just because of this
I'm looking into a hotel because of this
Yes. I don't want to do it inside my house because corpse "juice" really destroys a property and will lower the resale value. So I'll do it in my garden.
