Discussion Does anybody wish someone would just encourage them for once?

[Proxycake]

I think that the repetitiveness that everybody gives when you confess to suicidal thoughts hurts more than just keeping it in. Will there ever come a time where somebody would sit down and tell me that I should do it if it'll make me happy, or ask about how I plan to do it out of care and curiosity, rather with the plan to shove me into a ward?

 

[skaro]

Hey, I'll listen to your plans
But listen, and I'm speaking from a personal perspective here, it's literally impossible for me to encourage suicide since I would feel too much guilt for not preventing the person from doing it, and even worse, encouraging it. Yes I know, it's their choice etc etc, but it's just in my instinct, I can't help it. So I'm assuming that's how it is with others too. Although the people who choose to rat you out and get you into a psych ward instead of listening to you and talking to you sound like horrible people and it seems like they just don't want to have you on their mind, sorry but that's just how I feel.

 

[Proxycake]

Hey, I'll listen to your plans
But listen, and I'm speaking from a personal perspective here, it's literally impossible for me to encourage suicide since I would feel too much guilt for not preventing the person from doing it, and even worse, encouraging it. Yes I know, it's their choice etc etc, but it's just in my instinct, I can't help it. So I'm assuming that's how it is with others too. Although the people who choose to rat you out and get you into a psych ward instead of listening to you and talking to you sound like horrible people and it seems like they just don't want to have you on their mind, sorry but that's just how I feel.

I agree completely, I consider myself a little on the softer side when it comes to other people, I can't flat out encourage suicide. It hurts my heart. I think you're probably a very sweet and caring person for feeling like that too.

 

[FuneralCry]

The decision to die should only ever be respected, I hate how many people believe that suffering should be prolonged at all costs, those who are against the right to die just lack any compassion. It disgusts me how people try to imprison suicidal people in this existence when they just wish to be free.

 

[amb.boardman]

We arent gonna encourage it, how can we? I respect your choice and I will help you but, I wont tell you that you should die because I do not know you

 

[Jorms_McGander]

I think that the repetitiveness that everybody gives when you confess to suicidal thoughts hurts more than just keeping it in. Will there ever come a time where somebody would sit down and tell me that I should do it if it'll make me happy, or ask about how I plan to do it out of care and curiosity, rather with the plan to shove me into a ward?

Nope, there won't. You will only ever make this decision by yourself, of your own accord, without being coerced or supported. That's how free choice works. That's why Jim Jones was wrong.

If you look at the historic examples of suicide, in Jains and Buddhists, you see solitude and mindfulness, not support, not soothing

Life is solitude, and death, especially if you choose it, reflects that--it is also a part of life.

 

[Proxycake]

The decision to die should only ever be respected, I hate how many people believe that suffering should be prolonged at all costs, those who are against the right to die just lack any compassion. It disgusts me how people try to imprison suicidal people in this existence when they just wish to be free.

You understand it very well

 

[In-between]

The decision to die should only ever be respected, I hate how many people believe that suffering should be prolonged at all costs, those who are against the right to die just lack any compassion. It disgusts me how people try to imprison suicidal people in this existence when they just wish to be free.

I was completely in favour of assisted dying until I took an ethics class. I don't think there are many who oppose euthanasia or sanctioned suicide out of a desire to prolong suffering. There are many legal and ethical issues though, and many arguments I hear against the above are to do with protecting vulnerable people, e.g. a person who can't afford medical care and plans to CTB so as not to bankrupt their family, an elderly person who is being pressured by a relative to CTB so they can get inheritance. Finally, arguments focus around people who are mentally unwell (like me) - any state that helped people with MH issues to die, whether by assisting or not stopping attempts, would effectively be permitting the death of many unwell and disabled people…If you'd asked me two years a go for my thoughts on existence, I would have said much of what you've written, but now we have opposite views (which is ok, there is room for us all here). My point is, I appreciate your posts where you say what you believe, but please remember our thoughts on reality concern our reality only (including this :-D), they're not facts of life and death.

I think that the repetitiveness that everybody gives when you confess to suicidal thoughts hurts more than just keeping it in. Will there ever come a time where somebody would sit down and tell me that I should do it if it'll make me happy, or ask about how I plan to do it out of care and curiosity, rather with the plan to shove me into a ward?

I empathise with the pain of meeting the same reactions when disclosing these thoughts. It seems bizarre that in the West at least, we're drilled to reach out, talk about it etc, and yet even those who are trained on such things are often clueless. To encourage you though would be wrong…no matter how you feel about you, I could never wish you harm (which to me at least, is what the dying process is, regardless of beliefs about what comes next.) Talking helps though with people who understand.

 

[leavingsoon99]

I think that the repetitiveness that everybody gives when you confess to suicidal thoughts hurts more than just keeping it in. Will there ever come a time where somebody would sit down and tell me that I should do it if it'll make me happy, or ask about how I plan to do it out of care and curiosity, rather with the plan to shove me into a ward?

I understand and want that for myself. Like, a support group. I've wanted that too. People think suicide is bad or wrong, so they won't. And while SaSu is a much safer space than most, there are a lot of people on here who are pro-lifers low keying as "depressed" or whatever. So you won't find encouragement here. I just say "support" because few people know what being suicidal really is. And a lot of people shout it for attention.

I sympathize with you and (while I'm here) you can PM me. I think I understand how you feel. I wish there were channels that actually helped you through the process of it. Held your hand. You know?

 

[brokeandbroken]

I think that the repetitiveness that everybody gives when you confess to suicidal thoughts hurts more than just keeping it in. Will there ever come a time where somebody would sit down and tell me that I should do it if it'll make me happy, or ask about how I plan to do it out of care and curiosity, rather with the plan to shove me into a ward?

I find it interesting in medical school everyone couldn't talk enough shit about me and try to tear me down as much as possible. Encouraged? Lol! God no. Doesn't matter who it was. Family nah they were the worst, the school ha no, "friends" no, honestly I couldn't tell you someone who encouraged me. Literally i dont think someone encouraged me once. Attempts to humiliate though yep.

After the crimes while there. Bear in my no help or assistance. Nothing. Homeless and no one gives a fuck. Plenty of encouragement though. It's like running a marathon and someone Tanya Harding you but you know actually succeeding and breaking your legs. As you are writhing in pain desperately trying to get back to your legs which are all kinds of non functional almost cartoonishly deformed. People finally sitting there cheering you on. As you beg for help trying to grab on to someone they move and let you keep falling. But boy are they encouraging. I'd prefer them to tear me down and do something rather then this fake ass encouragement so people can tell themselves how great they are.

 

[zeek]

seems we have opposite problems,
most ive talked to have told me to go ahead
while i wish someone would just talk to me about it and save me

 

[Forever Sleep]

I guess it depends slightly on how or why you are talking about it. I can relate to almost asking for reassurance from loved ones in a way- kind of- I want to do this but I want you to be ok with it. I want to know that you will be able to cope with it.

But then- there's also talking about ideation because you're genuinely not sure on whether to act on it. Asking other people whether they think it's your best option suggests you really don't know yourself. Suicide isn't something someone can decide for you. It starts creeping into coercion when you think about it- someone is unsure what to do and another person pushes them towards death.

It probably depends on how you experience your ideation. Some people feel distressed by their suicidal thoughts and they are of two minds on whether they should fight them. Others fully embrace them as a natural and rational part of their thinking.

I'd imagine the majority of people think differently to us. They simply don't see suicide as a logical solution. They would maybe only consider it in the most obviously desperate of circumstances. So- they simply won't even entertain it as an option you could take.

The majority of people here I expect would sympathise with your situation. Most people are very pro-choice but that's the crux of it- it has to be your choice. If you haven't made that choice- then, people here or anywhere can't make it for you. People here will at least (most likey) accept your choice. We can't tell you it's your best option- because, we don't know but, fewer people will just block your feelings with platitudes here.

The real world is very pro-life though. It seems unlikely many would agree with you in the real world. Especially medical professionals- it's their job to keep people alive. I think the majority of people also feel a vested interest in keeping people alive. Either selfishly- because thry want to keep you around or- empathetically- because they are thinking about your friends and family who might miss you. Ironically- they don't tend to sympathise with the suicidal person. They seem to see them as the imminent problem.