Discussion does advice ever work?

[aubrey!]

Everyone always says the same stuff. everything from "If you feel bad about what you did, you've grown as a person" to "try working out, it improves your mental health" to "change your mindset." "accept the things that happened." "forgive yourself." "try moving forward."

have these things ever helped anyone? why does no shred of advice work for me? am i cursed? too far gone? i wonder.

apologies for the waste of a thread - but i suppose i'm just curious to hear more thoughts. i don't think there's much recovery for me myself anymore anyway.

 

[Roseate]

No, none of these advice works because for the most part it's just a bunch of people reciting what they've heard and they don't actually have an understanding of what it is we're feeling. Most people just go through life numbing their pain with drugs or optimism or anger. There is a small amount of people that understands and an even smaller amount that actually works through their problems. It's hard to take those so called optimists serious. They have no idea at all.

 

[NoLoveNoHope]

Honestly they don't work for me, I just turn off my brain and think yet again the same advice. I did try working out and it definitely wasn't for me but I did put in the effort nor switching to a healthier diet worked.

They're good things to do for your own mental health although it does not help mental illness. I think people just confuse mental illness and health thinking it's the same thing although they definitely aren't - one is a condition that needs therapy and meds if treatable and the other is just for keeping yourself in a healthy mindset.

I think advice like that would work for someone in a rough patch and not mental illness which I assume is your case.

Those are just my thoughts on the subject, I might be wrong so if I am feel free to correct me.

 

[aubrey!]

Honestly they don't work for me, I just turn off my brain and think yet again the same advice. I did try working out and it definitely wasn't for me but I did put in the effort nor switching to a healthier diet worked.

They're good things to do for your own mental health although it does not help mental illness. I think people just confuse mental illness and health thinking it's the same thing although they definitely aren't - one is a condition that needs therapy and meds if treatable and the other is just for keeping yourself in a healthy mindset.

I think advice like that would work for someone in a rough patch and not mental illness which I assume is your case.

Those are just my thoughts on the subject, I might be wrong so if I am feel free to correct me.

I'm curious what therapy is even like.. Is it just.. more complicated advice giving? Seems strange, and the thought of opening up to a real person, who even worse is just doing it for the pay.. gross.. i do wish i could open up to someone but it'd be someone close, not a paid actor.

I absolute agree with the mental health and illness part. a lot of mentally ill are just viewed as having "unusually bad mental health."
i don't really know what my case is. it's difficult to say without a diagnosis. I don't wanna say I'm depressed when maybe it's just a phase or something.

No, none of these advice works because for the most part it's just a bunch of people reciting what they've heard and they don't actually have an understanding of what it is we're feeling. Most people just go through life numbing their pain with drugs or optimism or anger. There is a small amount of people that understands and an even smaller amount that actually works through their problems. It's hard to take those so called optimists serious. They have no idea at all.

Yeah. It is always the happiest people giving that kind of advice, huh? Lol. funnier all thosenpeople have never done anything they suggest, they were just born happier i guess.

 

[NoLoveNoHope]

I'm curious what therapy is even like.. Is it just.. more complicated advice giving? Seems strange, and the thought of opening up to a real person, who even worse is just doing it for the pay.. gross.. i do wish i could open up to someone but it'd be someone close, not a paid actor.

I absolute agree with the mental health and illness part. a lot of mentally ill are just viewed as having "unusually bad mental health."
i don't really know what my case is. it's difficult to say without a diagnosis. I don't wanna say I'm depressed when maybe it's just a phase or something.

Yeah. It is always the happiest people giving that kind of advice, huh? Lol. funnier all thosenpeople have never done anything they suggest, they were just born happier i guess.

I dislike therapy as in talk therapy but there's a few other therapies out there that I'm a fan of specifically ones involving psychedelics, never had a psychedelic but had a similar experience. It was for me really healing and that's why I love the concept and why I'm hoping for it to be legalized as it's benefits can be massive.

It's honestly a really weird learning experience knowing psychedelics have been shown to be more effective than SSRI's (standard anti-depressants).

 

[aubrey!]

I dislike therapy as in talk therapy but there's a few other therapies out there that I'm a fan of specifically ones involving psychedelics, never had a psychedelic but had a similar experience. It was for me really healing and that's why I love the concept and why I'm hoping for it to be legalized as it's benefits can be massive.

It's honestly a really weird learning experience knowing psychedelics have been shown to be more effective than SSRI's (standard anti-depressants).

Ah yeah, i guess therapy is a pretty wide open word. Therapists is always what comes to my mind. Psychedelics seem neat, i just like the concept of something i can do with and for myself. avoid the bothering of others, all that nonsense.

 

[Roseate]

Yeah. It is always the happiest people giving that kind of advice, huh? Lol. funnier all thosenpeople have never done anything they suggest, they were just born happier i guess.

Yeah not everyone go through depression like some of us do. It's hard actually because sometimes not even therapist understand. They often confuse it a lot. I kind of wish there were more therapist/psychiatrist that understood depression and suicidal thoughts.

 

[NoLoveNoHope]

Ah yeah, i guess therapy is a pretty wide open word. Therapists is always what comes to my mind. Psychedelics seem neat, i just like the concept of something i can do with and for myself. avoid the bothering of others, all that nonsense.

100% just sucks it's illegal in most places.

 

[hopeless302]

Depends on the advice, and the severity of whatever it is you're dealing with. For example, some people might see an improvement in their situation if they work out, go out more, and/or talk to someone about what they're going through. Others report no real improvement in their mental state after doing those things. I guess the point these advice givers are trying to make is to try something to elevate your circumstances. Probably won't cure your depression overnight, but it might make things more tolerable.

Of course, the flaw in this kind of advice is that it presumes the depressed person hasn't tried hard enough to feel better, which usually isn't the case. So it just comes across as insensitive at best. But still, its probably worth exploring safe ways to feel a little better.

 

[ireallylikemangoes]

Most of the advice I get told by people who haven't actually gone through a mental health crisis are at best easier said than done and at worst insensitive, depressed people are already struggling to do basic daily tasks and find just existing incredibly tiring. Everyone knows working out, going out more, doing something for yourself is good for you but this advice is useless when the person struggles with getting out of bed.

Recovery takes a shit ton of willpower and time and taking it one step at a time is still incredibly hard to do. The best advice I have is to find a support system in your journey to recovery

 

[81-Z@P@D]

Everyone always says the same stuff. everything from "If you feel bad about what you did, you've grown as a person" to "try working out, it improves your mental health" to "change your mindset." "accept the things that happened." "forgive yourself." "try moving forward."

have these things ever helped anyone? why does no shred of advice work for me? am i cursed? too far gone? i wonder.

apologies for the waste of a thread - but i suppose i'm just curious to hear more thoughts. i don't think there's much recovery for me myself anymore anyway.

It helps in the same sense eating healthy foods is constructive when you have something like cancer. But as with steve jobs, it will not save you from cancer.

 

[dingokettle3531]

Depends on the type of advice, the situation the person the advice is being given to is going through, etc, working out for example isn't for everyone and it for sure does NOT improve your mental health alone. It is a way of helping to achieve better mental health, but that alone doesn't really do it, and that's as a person who works out fairly often since over a year ago

 

[NambaSutra]

None of it has worked for me. Not pills, not therapy, not podcasts, not advice from family, not advice from internet randos.

In my experience nothing works.

 

[cogmachine]

people tend to miss nuances of the advice and why it (does not) work. it sounds simple to them because it makes sense to them, but they don't know why, or don't bother explaining the implications of it. for example, keeping your room clean or having a healthy diet won't solve deep seated issues you have, but living on heaps of garbage and eating highly addictive junk food will only pile on the problems. they skip over those parts and treat it like a miracle.

 

[epic]

Well thought out advice can work depending on the situation.
When a problem has a concrete biological cause which undermines your health (eg Cancer or severe hallucinations) , any philosophical advice becomes harder to work .
For problems with root cause as money, looks or relationships, a change in perspective can go a long way .

 

[Janine]

I think advice can definetly work, but you need to be open for it. If you feel everyone will tell you the same things anyways and you're fed up from hearing them, there'll obviously be no to negative effects.

am i cursed? too far gone? i wonder.

I don't think so, maybe you are just around the wrong people. Don't get me wrong, it's great to have social contact if you think you're happier with it, but different approaches and ways of thought can help with your issues.

i don't think there's much recovery for me myself anymore anyway.

Do you want to recover? That's something you should ask yourself before getting upset over failed attempts. I'm sure you have it in you to recover and wish you all the best.

 

[Moonomyth]

Everyone always says the same stuff. everything from "If you feel bad about what you did, you've grown as a person" to "try working out, it improves your mental health" to "change your mindset." "accept the things that happened." "forgive yourself." "try moving forward."

have these things ever helped anyone? why does no shred of advice work for me? am i cursed? too far gone? i wonder.

apologies for the waste of a thread - but i suppose i'm just curious to hear more thoughts. i don't think there's much recovery for me myself anymore anyway.

Sometimes, but not always. It may or may not work for you depending on who's saying it, when they're saying it, how you're feeling when it's said, and a bunch of other factors. Too many variables to tell.

This is very unsatisfying, however true it is, which is why people don't like to say it much.

 

[domedune]

Often advice doesn't work. But the advice, "You can't go back in time. Ruminating doesn't help. You can be better next time." does help sometimes. Advice helps more if you think about why it's good, if it is good. Also, fully considering the implications of advice can lead you to realizing it's bad.

The quality of advice is sometimes not the advice itself but where the advice is coming from. It also depends on the beholder. You must be open to advice for it to work. Some people aren't open to ideas and scoff at any little thing.

 

[SpiderLink]

Everyone always says the same stuff. everything from "If you feel bad about what you did, you've grown as a person" to "try working out, it improves your mental health" to "change your mindset." "accept the things that happened." "forgive yourself." "try moving forward."

have these things ever helped anyone? why does no shred of advice work for me? am i cursed? too far gone? i wonder.

apologies for the waste of a thread - but i suppose i'm just curious to hear more thoughts. i don't think there's much recovery for me myself anymore anyway.

Short answers like this isn't helpful for me.
A lot of these things can be very challenging, and the people that say these things (not all) make it sound so easy and say it so carelessly. Which can be more damaging (at least for me)

 

[Griz-]

Everyone always says the same stuff. everything from "If you feel bad about what you did, you've grown as a person" to "try working out, it improves your mental health" to "change your mindset." "accept the things that happened." "forgive yourself." "try moving forward."

have these things ever helped anyone? why does no shred of advice work for me? am i cursed? too far gone? i wonder.

apologies for the waste of a thread - but i suppose i'm just curious to hear more thoughts. i don't think there's much recovery for me myself anymore anyway.

Advice can work it just takes somebody that really cares and know what they are talking about for it to be effective

 

[starrvingstar]

this kind of thing is just simple basic self care, it takes so much more and it also takes willpower.