Do you treat people better or worse since you've been suicidal?

[Motoko]

I'm wondering how has being suicidal affected your attitude towards other people. Do you feel more empathy and you are nicer to them? Or maybe the opposite, and you stopped caring about others and you're more selfish?
I think my attitude changed for worse. I'm more selfish, skeptical and have less patience with others.
I feel a little bad about it, but at the same time I'm just so sick of everything that I care less and less (but still do).
What about you guys?

 

[Life_and_Death]

ive always been a nice caring person, but being suicidal definitely opened my eyes to the fact that even the worse people in the world are that way for a reason and we shouldnt automatically judge them. of course if they are just going to let their problems rule them and not try to change for the better then you can only try to work with a person for so long

 

[Eachdaymakesmedumber]

Worse. I'm letting my true self out more. I'm thinking, now I finally can show how much I hate humanity. Just small acts. Very subtle.
I'll do worse once the day of death comes. Not hurting anyone physically but throwing stuff on parents on the streets perhaps.

I'm planning on throwing rotten fruit and shit on parents.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

It depends. In certain situations I find it makes me more empathetic and caring towards people since I am sensitive to the pain a situation might be causing them. As someone who has made lots of mistakes due to my emotions I try to be understanding and to not judge people for their errors.

In other situations I am more harsh with people since I feel resentful of the world and other people to some extent.

 

[strand]

My attitude towards others didn't change because of my suicidal ideation. What did change it though, was finding out about others' suicidal ideation. Reading about others' struggles has kind of made me more cautious and more expressively compassionate to others, at least on a small scale, but it's still something, I guess. I don't know if I would have changed this way only because of my depression, I try to keep that isolated it to myself if that makes sense.

 

[Motoko]

My attitude towards others didn't change because of my suicidal ideation. What did change it though, was finding out about others' suicidal ideation. Reading about others' struggles has kind of made me more cautious and more expressively compassionate to others, at least on a small scale, but it's still something, I guess. I don't know if I would have changed this way only because of my depression, I try to keep that isolated it to myself if that makes sense.

I feel you. That makes perfect sense.

 

[Eachdaymakesmedumber]

People are the actual reason I developed BPD. (Bullying 3 years + more incidents)

My whole life f**ed over.

 

[VoidGirl]

Worst. Other people's choices and actions have had more influence than my own towards me wanting to CTB. I am full of resentment towards both people I knew and society as a whole.

 

[bigdog]

Basically they don't care. My only friend tries to convince me everything is ok but he don't understand how horrible it is

 

[parasytes_]

I'm not sure to be honest. I do try to treat people better than I did in the past, but a large part of me still feels pretty negative and pessimistic as well. I try to keep these feelings to myself so others don't have to deal with my crap though.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I think worse. I used to be kinder. I'm still kind to most people. I'm harsh with my family, though. I'm hardened as a person. Also, there are people I hate now. I never used to hate before.

 

[Cosmiq]

Worse. I'm not cruel or anything. Just feel bad that I'm not able to be a better friend to the few people I care about. I'm distant, avoidant, and know this hurts them before I am able to even ctb. But because I don't know how to just pretend nothing is wrong or put on a more cheerful face for them, I feel like I'm hurting them more than necessary right now.

 

[TAW122]

I'd still treat them about the same as I've been. My suicidality has no bearing on how I go about treating others and also, I'd be wary of how I treat others as if I treat them differently all of a sudden, they may catch a red flag and start to get into my life, which is what I'm trying to avoid.

 

[Motoko]

I'd still treat them about the same as I've been. My suicidality has no bearing on how I go about treating others and also, I'd be wary of how I treat others as if I treat them differently all of a sudden, they may catch a red flag and start to get into my life, which is what I'm trying to avoid.

good point. Will have to keep that in mind.

 

[heraclitus]

Better. Just as no-one can see or understand what I am dealing with or the burdens I carry, I cannot see theirs. There is a satisfaction in treating others with more compassion that I expect from them.

I hide my sadness behind niceness.

 

[Nymph]

Unfortunately worse

 

[so tired or manic]

I've been suicidal since I was 14 and I have no solid memories before then. but I've always been an empath where I feel others emotions. be it just reading facial features and picking via that or actually feeling their emotions somehow, I still feel sad when I know someone else is sad.

 

[s3gfault]

I think I've changed for the better. I'm young and I know I'm going soon so I've done the best I can to basically come to peace with everything which means squashing all my beefs, telling my parents I love them sincerely, and visiting family that doesn't get to see me that much. Basically saying my final goodbyes and coming to peace with the universe.

 

[Nymph]

Unfortunately worse

Worse because I'm just so angry about my existence and I keep putting my emotions on other people, mainly my mom. I know it's bad but the fact they made me is also bad. I told her my opinions on antinatalism and she said that: people just make babies, it's a normal thing. And yeah but it shouldn't be a normal regular thing. It's selfish, plus my mom always calls me selfish and says that I'm only thinking about myself but she's also selfish. She was only thinking about her self when she made me. Why don't I get to be selfish. I want to die because of you mom

 

[XYZ]

I pretty much avoid people at this point. I'd say that in itself qualifies as an act of kindness towards them. I rid this fucking world of my toxic presence.

 

[raindrops]

Before I was suicidal I use to be very judgemental of others, my ego was enormous. I would judge how someone looked or if it was a friend I'd judge how their house looked behind their back!!!! I only said these things to my ex-partner I'm not a shit stirrer. Now I feel like ctb I no longer judge anyone unfairly, harshly or bitchy...I think to myself well at least they have a home or at least they're comfortable to leave the house without makeup or dressed in the latest trend, at least they have the job they want and a family who cares or if not at least they're independent/confident (2 things I am not)

Being suicidal has made me more mindful of others, I'm definitely more caring and thoughtful, don't get me wrong I'm not saying being suicidal is a way to achieve that, but I am so glad what I've been through has made me this way. Can proudly say I am not a bitch, just an anxious mess most days.

 

[Bauhaus]

I'm more indifferent now, I'm tired to explain and defend myself to anyone (especially doctors & shrinks).

 

[SingleSeraph]

I would say that it's better for me. Ever since I've dealt with crippling anxiety and depression,I've had a different approach towards others in a way where I feel empathy towards them and some friends confide in me when it comes to venting out their frustrations. No one is on my level of misery and really try to make sure they're being understood and don't end up like me. I want others to feel understood even if I don't know the full context of their issues.

 

[mathieu]

I've been suicidal since I was 15 so I barely even remember what I was like before that. I'd say I treat people somewhat worse because I'm unhappy and I hate the world.

 

[Lorntroubles]

I don't really interact with anyone nowadays but the times I do, I'm pretty straightforward. Whether they like it or not....tough shit. I don't go out my way to be hurtful but I have less patience now, my time is valuable, and nobody gets to pull a fast one on me. To summarize, worse because even Mr. Cool Guy gets hurt and is not gonna take shit from people who have insecurities and projects it. I'm not going to be belittled.