I sometimes come across the phrase that a person longs to be 'saved' or rescued by another. To be honest- I also used to have similar hopes. I think that's why Jane Eyre appealed to me although, it felt more like they saved one another there.
I also used to feel upset by the phrase: 'You need to love yourself before loving another'. I wasn't sure I could ever accomplish that. I suppose in a way, I became content and regulated enough on my own that I eventually realised I didn't need another.
But- in that heightened state of need. To be so utterly dependent on another- do you suppose many people can cope with that dependency?
I suppose I came to the conclusion that my type of love would be too over- attached to be comfortable for a potential them or me. That's not to say I had much else going for me either! I'm not attractive. But, it was disappointing to feel like even my loving style would likely be slightly toxic.
I imagine it could actually be a recipe for disaster too- if the other person is possessive and manipulative. They may in fact enjoy being that person's only contact.
What do you think? Do some over- attached/ very needy relationships work? Are there some personalities that fit ok with someone who depends on them heavily- in a healthy way? Can a person be 'saved'? Will they ever move beyond a high level of need? If not, can both people live with that comfortably?
I also used to feel upset by the phrase: 'You need to love yourself before loving another'. I wasn't sure I could ever accomplish that. I suppose in a way, I became content and regulated enough on my own that I eventually realised I didn't need another.
But- in that heightened state of need. To be so utterly dependent on another- do you suppose many people can cope with that dependency?
I suppose I came to the conclusion that my type of love would be too over- attached to be comfortable for a potential them or me. That's not to say I had much else going for me either! I'm not attractive. But, it was disappointing to feel like even my loving style would likely be slightly toxic.
I imagine it could actually be a recipe for disaster too- if the other person is possessive and manipulative. They may in fact enjoy being that person's only contact.
What do you think? Do some over- attached/ very needy relationships work? Are there some personalities that fit ok with someone who depends on them heavily- in a healthy way? Can a person be 'saved'? Will they ever move beyond a high level of need? If not, can both people live with that comfortably?
