VisionsOfHell

VisionsOfHell

Experienced
Oct 31, 2020
259
A few days ago I had a bizarre dream related to suicide. In it two of my old friends whom I have not heard from in years just showed up at my doorstep. From their faces alone, I could already tell that they knew everything.

At first they seemed merely shocked and sad but as time progressed they became more and more aggressive. It felt like they were detectives and I was being interrogated. They were constantly watching me and I even had to cook food for them. When I woke up I was still left with that feeling that they would never leave me alone so I'll never be able to ctb.

Please share your dreams related to suicide if you like.
 
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Delia

Delia

Cerulean star
May 15, 2018
230
well there are two i've done recently.

But before I headed to sleep i went out and randomly thought "if i meet a cat on my way home that means i'll die soon", i didn't meet any cats though at night when i went to bed i dreamt that on my way home i met a herd of cats waiting for me in front of the gates that was kind of funny.

The other one which isn't as funny though was that ingested SN and that i was too lethargic to do anything, that was rather stressful.
 
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BridgeJumper

BridgeJumper

The Arsonist
Apr 7, 2019
1,194
Every other night. They get more and more fucked everyday and nobody cares.
 
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TripleA

TripleA

life is a struggle you cannot win
Sep 25, 2020
276
Yes i dreaming about shallow water blackout
 
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ecmnesia

ecmnesia

the only thing humans are equal in is death
Aug 30, 2020
767
yes, now that my date is close, i only dream about it, different methods, my corpse, other people's reaction and so on.
 
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Yuki Tenuki

Yuki Tenuki

Member
Oct 30, 2020
58
I'ts not related to suicide in particular but to death in general: my dreams are overwhelmingly vivid and I can actually feel the deathblowing hits and that butcher knife in my guts that guarantees death. Getting killed in dreams is an unpleasant feeling - but it is bearable. That's my experience with near death situations in dreams.
I hope that in the end the real suicide will be bearable too. :/
 
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BridgeJumper

BridgeJumper

The Arsonist
Apr 7, 2019
1,194
I'ts not related to suicide in particular but to death in general: my dreams are overwhelmingly vivid and I can actually feel the deathblowing hits and that butcher knife in my guts that guarantees death. Getting killed in dreams is an unpleasant feeling - but it is bearable. That's my experience with near death situations in dreams.
I hope that in the end the real suicide will be bearable too. :/

This is what I feel in my dreams as well, the sensations are so real! The cold of river water and everything :o It jolts me awake like electric current
 
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imdone1

imdone1

Member
Oct 11, 2020
27
Yes, I took it as more of a prediction or theory my own mind made up, though. I was speaking with my mom as a spirit in the dream, because I had died. I was comforting her and asking her about how life was going. She seemed okay, or at least she was holding it together pretty well. I remember feeling really at peace in the dream, and like I finally got a break; kinda like if you've been running for a marathon for a while and then afterwards you can finally rest. I was happier, too.
 
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BridgeJumper

BridgeJumper

The Arsonist
Apr 7, 2019
1,194
I had a dream that I jumped off GGB and just kept falling after I hit the water, sinking into some weird underwater world like Marianas trench or something. And I found my mothers spirit in there, laying in a fancy bathtub, beckoning me to talk to her....I dont even talk to her in real life? Its crazy...
For some reason this goes away when Im on meds. Zero dreams. They remove everything from my brain and I just pass out and wake up in the morning
 
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W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
Well, I had a dream which was not exactly suicide but a forced death.

There was a thief and I told him I was not giving him any money and he'd better kill me if he wanted to get it.

What happened? He shot me in the head and I was dead but in the darkness I was seeing, a kinda window with options appeared. The choices were "live your life again from zero but with your memories of the past one, available", "live in another world" "go to heaven/hell"
Sadly, when I was about to pick one of the options, I woke up.

PS:
I probably dreamt that because I read a lot of isekai manga (comics in which main characters die and go to another world lol)
 
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BridgeJumper

BridgeJumper

The Arsonist
Apr 7, 2019
1,194
Well, I had a dream which was not exactly suicide but a forced death.

There was a thief and I told him I was not giving him any money and he'd better kill me if he wanted to get it.

What happened? He shot me in the head and I was dead but in the darkness I was seeing, a kinda window with options appeared. The choices were "live your life again from zero but with your memories", "live in another world" "go to heaven/hell"
Sadly, when I was about to pick one of the options, I woke up.

PS:
I probably dreamt that because I read a lot of isekai manga (comics in which main characters die and go to another world lol)
Holy crap :O
 
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Mywill

Mywill

Member
Feb 6, 2020
91
I constantly having lucid dreams about suicide practically, I always jumped if I knew its a dream, its a great practice to fight SI without actual doing it. Moreover, when you hit the ground you felt absolute no pain except nausea, and the dream just go on.
 
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k75

k75

L'appel du Vide
Jun 27, 2019
2,546
I do, but they're also strange and hard to make sense of. I have tons of dreams I never really remember after I wake up, but these types stick with me.

I've had a few variations of this one, and it's very vivid. It involved a method I would never actually do: driving off a cliff or bridge. But the weird thing is I was somehow both observer and also the driver. I was shocked and devastated watching the car drive over the side because I couldn't believe "she" actually did it, but it was also somehow me in the car. And the weirdest thing is there were other people around, but I was the only one who seemed to see it happen. I kept asking, but nobody saw the car and didn't believe me. It was like I was really there, which was very unsettling.

I can remember one where I was falling and terrified. I don't know what happened, but I assume I must have jumped. (That's also not a method I would in a million years do.) The dream felt like it lasted forever, and I'm just falling the whole time and it's super bleak and scary. I woke up in a panic right as I hit the ground in the dream, and I swear I felt it all. It was like every bone was shattered and I couldn't breathe. It took awhile to recover from the dream trauma in real life.

The most recent one was also the most amusing. The dream started in the middle of a dinner with 3 friends. Nobody was touching their food, and I was studying them, trying to figure out why. Then one of them sighed and started to eat, and everyone else did too. Suddenly I understood everything, and I couldn't decide if I was relieved or upset at my friend. Apparently, it was her turn to secretly poison the salad and she hadn't done it, so we were safe this meal. Best I can figure, we were suicidal and came up with some sort of dinner party Russian roulette so nobody had to worry about SI. LOL
 
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xLosthopex

xLosthopex

Tell my dogs I love them
May 29, 2020
1,135
I frequently get dreams(nightmares) where I fail an attempt
 
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SuicideRed

SuicideRed

Member
Nov 21, 2020
19
I dream about it all the time. I usually wake up when trying to do it in my dream and feel incredibly suicidal then.
 
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BridgeJumper

BridgeJumper

The Arsonist
Apr 7, 2019
1,194
Best I can figure, we were suicidal and came up with some sort of dinner party Russian roulette so nobody had to worry about SI. LOL

'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing
Best I can figure, we were suicidal and came up with some sort of dinner party Russian roulette so nobody had to worry about SI. LOL

'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing
Best I can figure, we were suicidal and came up with some sort of dinner party Russian roulette so nobody had to worry about SI. LOL

'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing
Best I can figure, we were suicidal and came up with some sort of dinner party Russian roulette so nobody had to worry about SI. LOL

'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing

I am dumb and did the multiquote thing again and too tired to fix it sorry
 
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All washed up

All washed up

Experienced
Oct 31, 2020
232
I recently had a dream not directly about suicide, but I was on a journey with another SS member who I've seen a photo of and voice called but never video called or met IRL.
The other person then wandered off with someone else leaving me all alone.
I think it's a sign that I'm spending way too much time on SS, lol
 
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k75

k75

L'appel du Vide
Jun 27, 2019
2,546
'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing


'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing


'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing


'Suicidal russian roulette'
This is awesome, why didnt I think of this!?
Lets Play a game. In one glass you have N, in the othe two bitter nail Polish. Which one do you choose? *drinks all 3*
Sorry for derailing

I am dumb and did the multiquote thing again and too tired to fix it sorry
Times like this, I wish for a laugh emoji. LOL

I never could figure out the multiquote thing!
 
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suicidesheep31

suicidesheep31

Specialist
Jun 27, 2020
349
Last night I was dreaming that I was running and taking the stock of meds I have. I was running because nobody wanted to let me take the meds. And I was putting water everywhere while I was trying to swallow them... And I woke up...
 
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UglyDuck666

UglyDuck666

Member
Nov 14, 2020
44
Yes. I'm my last dream I was on some big and crazy party with dead people. Most of them died because they choose suicide. I played poker with them XD
 
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sarahR

sarahR

Experienced
Nov 11, 2020
225
No. I take way too many sleeping pills. I don't sleep. I enter a coma almost every night!
 
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NodusTollens

NodusTollens

Nov 17, 2020
989
Seldomly.

If I die in my dreams I am attacked by someone or thing; or I am killed while saving someone else.

My dreams tend to be trauma related, so I smoke to avoid those pesky dreams/emotions.
 
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LonelyDude15

LonelyDude15

Currently Spiraling
Sep 26, 2020
277
No. I take way too many sleeping pills. I don't sleep. I enter a coma almost every night!
What pills? I desperately need to sleep.
 
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ARW3N

ARW3N

Melancholia
Dec 25, 2019
396
Yes, one of my earliest childhood nightmares was being magnetically pulled under the wheels of passing cars and getting crushed to death. Other nightmares involved getting hanged as a witch or wizard and being pursued by tigers at the top of a tower with a winding staircase. They even ate me alive.
 
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builtwrong

builtwrong

permanent solution to a permanent problem
Aug 24, 2020
51
One time, I had a dream that I was sitting in a door frame—the right side my bathroom and the left my room—with my back to one side, sitting legs crossed. I had a 9mm, and instead of using a full mag I pulled back the slide, inserted a round into the chamber by hand, and let the slide close. I put the gun in my mouth pointed slightly back, and pulled the trigger. It didn't kill me though, just blew half my face off somehow. Even though I was seeing from a first person perspective I knew what my face looked like, and it was almost like I was seeing first person and a perspective looking down on myself at the same time. My half asleep mind interpreted the failed shot as having paralyzed the left half of my body, so I pulled up my left leg with my right arm, leaving the left side limp, such that my knees were together and I was no longer sitting criss cross. I put the gun between my knees and pulled back the slide to insert another round. Again, I put the gun and my mouth, and shot to no effect. This repeated on until i was able to shake myself out of the dream. Waking up from it was weird, cause it was like I had to pull myself out of the dream, and I had slight sleep paralysis when I opened my eyes so it took me a little while to separate what was and wasn't real as I shook off the dream. That was probably my worst experience dreaming about suicide
 
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Weary Soul

Weary Soul

Soon I will be free
Nov 13, 2019
1,156
I rarely remember my dreams, but lately I have been having many and they are very vivid. Likely, because my time is coming close.

I dreamt of my ex walking his dog out in the back of my house. This is the one who broke my ribs, caused the brain bleed that almost killed me, and most recently assaulted me when I was 3-weeks post-concussion. [Oh wow - I think I just realized the meaning of this dream. The last argument we had was horrific and occurred because I was too tired and in too much pain to walk the dogs. He went off on me - at first incredibly verbally abusive and then the assault me after I had tried to walk away.]

I had a dream of someone here at SS that has moved on, and he told me he was ok and asked me to tell everyone. Never spoke with this person personally. [Maybe that was my subconscious way of trying to soothe my anxiety???]

And lastly - I dreamt of a magnificent white deer who made motions for me to follow it. I woke up before I could follow it.

It has been very unsettling, these dreams, but I suppose it may be SI slipping into play.

<3
 
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EraseRewind

EraseRewind

Circling the drain
May 13, 2020
225
I've had many dreams about ctb.

I was told by a voice in my dream back in January that this was my last year alive and that something big was coming. I told my wife about the something big and she just laughed at me. I've never mentioned the last year alive because it scared me a bit and I didn't want to upset her.

I've had dreams about making mistakes and errors of judgement that have come to pass, even though I'd had the dreams I still did them.

So do I expect that I might shuffle off this mortal coil in the next couple of months, who knows, and to be fair it'll save me a job if I do, I'm so ready.

This rollercoaster is getting too old now.

Love to all ❤️
 
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FatalSystemError591

FatalSystemError591

{He/They}
Oct 12, 2020
229
I had a dream where I woke up in a hospital with no idea where I was. Also another where a nuclear bomb dropped and I somehow survived the blast.
 
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