I think this thought can be a symptom caused by depression. It is often asked in those therapist diagnosis criteria sheets.
I think it is not a rational thought. I often tell myself this. It is quite patholgocial I think. At least for my case. I was abused and bullied heavily as child and teenager. I don't deserve the hell I am going through. The people who did that to me deserved it. But most of them have good lives. Very very likely way better life quality than me. It is difficult to have lower life quality. But the worst is yet to come.
Yeah when I ruminate why I am going through all of this I ask me the question of the title. Sometimes life feels so cynical, rigged, unfair and absurd that I really ask myself why me. I don't want to believe in karma. I think this kind of mythical/relgious thinking can increase your pain a lot. The time when I believed in hell was also quite horrible. Becoming atheist has decreased my anxiety a little bit.
There are myths like: If people commit suicide they have to re-live their life forever as punishment for it. I read this in this forum as a myth. I think the notion is pretyy cruel. And very very likely not true. I find it horrible to make the situation for suicidal people even worse by inventing myths like that. So many religions have made that. People who tried to ctb and survived were even punished for it. The society has to learn to treat suicidal people better. There still is a very long way to go.
I sometimes have the feeling maybe it is true that I get punished. Because I cannot explain why else everything is so extremely unfair. But I think it is a irrational thought. It is caused by my illness and I have to fight against this thought.
I think it is not a rational thought. I often tell myself this. It is quite patholgocial I think. At least for my case. I was abused and bullied heavily as child and teenager. I don't deserve the hell I am going through. The people who did that to me deserved it. But most of them have good lives. Very very likely way better life quality than me. It is difficult to have lower life quality. But the worst is yet to come.
Yeah when I ruminate why I am going through all of this I ask me the question of the title. Sometimes life feels so cynical, rigged, unfair and absurd that I really ask myself why me. I don't want to believe in karma. I think this kind of mythical/relgious thinking can increase your pain a lot. The time when I believed in hell was also quite horrible. Becoming atheist has decreased my anxiety a little bit.
There are myths like: If people commit suicide they have to re-live their life forever as punishment for it. I read this in this forum as a myth. I think the notion is pretyy cruel. And very very likely not true. I find it horrible to make the situation for suicidal people even worse by inventing myths like that. So many religions have made that. People who tried to ctb and survived were even punished for it. The society has to learn to treat suicidal people better. There still is a very long way to go.
I sometimes have the feeling maybe it is true that I get punished. Because I cannot explain why else everything is so extremely unfair. But I think it is a irrational thought. It is caused by my illness and I have to fight against this thought.
