Do you ever feel that you're being mistaken as "attention seeking" or "crying wolf"?. Perhaps you really are hurting but sending the wrong signals?

[TorturedEnough]

I feel this way sometimes. I often express my emotions to people I trust as a way to cope with myself and I find that when I do it more often, I'm being made to feel that I complain too much or that I'm just "seeking for attention".

I've been told that I "overemphasize" how I feel and that there are far worse things happening in the world. But what must I go through to show that my misery is real? To what extent should I be wounded to show that I'm living in hell?

Should I just allow my feelings to be invalidated or simply be dismissed?

 

[gbi2]

YEs it does seem that peopel react after an elevation of seriousness or degredation of wellbeing when the signs were there and early treatment could have helped. There are actually quite a few posts from Doctors in the DoctorsUK subreddit who say how they are expected to give 10 minutes to each patient in a routine cycle, when an extra half an hour could enable them to catch the problem earlier with the proper treatment.

And with friends and family, they just want an easy life so they are keen to explain away problems as if they are fleeting minor inconveniences that will go away on their own and making a fuss will be seen as over dramatising.

Similarly, a Youtuber I watch once said how he had 2 ideas for a video. Once required going abroad and doing a lot to film it and another staying local and attempting something easier. When he evaluated all the responses from people he said he realised when you ask friends and family for advice, they will say the thing that is the safes suggestion that doesn't involve much effort from them, nor you, but also does not get as much of a reward at the end. HE ignored them and did the difficult option, which he said was the best video he ever did.

I think that is evidence that even in health peopel do the same thing. Unless you are bleeding and the bleeding wasn't caused by you, they wont pay much attention and will play down any concerns you tell them, so it is less worry for them, and you, and the reward of getting better is less likely.

 

[DeadHead]

No because everyone who knows me knows I have an inoperable brain tumour that is getting bigger with worsening symptoms.

 

[baabbaabbaab]

I have no answer...

I've been accused the same as you, though I just opened my heart because I wanted to show the hell I was going through...

 

[nembutal]

i feel my attempts or my self harm are seen as such. i don't mind them being labeled a cry for help but once they stray into the territory of "manipulation" i feel misunderstood and shunned. i don't want to be a manipulator.

 

[R_N]

I held everything in as kid and no one noticed I suffered until I had enough. But even if they did, "help" I got later destroyed me even more.

Now I don't expect to be understood by anyone and it is fine. I share my thoughts here and there and that is enough for me. I don't care too much about how other mortals perceive me, only to an extent that I need to get by. We are not able to help each other in a true sense, we are all doomed in the end.

 

[Ash’Girl]

Sometimes, sentences slip out of my mouth without me thinking about them until I get looked at like I've grown another head. Boss asked how I'm doing a few weeks ago and I said "I want to go to sleep and never wake up".

I didn't think about it, it literally spilled out because it's genuinely, honestly how I've been feeling for a long time and he caught me at a very bad moment. However he's known me for a long time and also a lot of the personal traumas of the last few years, so it's not like he instantly thought "red flag, get her help". He just kinda smiled and said "come on now, it's not that bad" and nudged my shoulder which is his version of a work safe hug.

Most times I just shrug and say "I'm tired but I'm ok" or something, the more socially acceptable kind of response. But because I've wanted to die for such a long time and I'm still here, I pretty much think actually talking about the struggles is pointless. Because I'm still here, I suspect nobody believes I'll actually ever succeed. Drs included. And it's funny (not funny) I guess, because I see all these mental health campaigns that advertise a lot of things as potential red flags that I likely embody but again, because I'm still here, they are not really thought of as particularly red flaggy in my case - at least not in the way they'd be considered warning signs in someone without a prolonged history of mental health struggles?

Anyway, mostly I just do what all the campaigns say not to do and suffer in silence because talking about things is largely pointless.

 

[CTB Fella]

I have EUPD/BPD (and OCD.)

It's well known that we are demonised, and seen as attention seekers.

It's the worst mental health diagnosis to have.

They (the "professionals") simply give up on us.

But fuck them, the muggy cunts. They've read a few books, and taken some exams. They don't know the first thing about mental health.