Do you consider being a member of a suicide forum as part of your identity?

[noname223]

Maybe we could imagine the following hypothetical scenario. You meet a person that does not know anything about you. You promise each other to tell the other one everything about your personality while being fully honest. Is explaining you are part of a suicide forum here necessary?

For me personally telling I am longterm suicidal would be pretty essential. This forum probably too. I spend a lot of time in it every evening. It is like a ritual before I go to bed it calms me down and lets me become reflective. I think especially longterm members are more likely to answer the question with yes.

I often think about this forum. Which new threads I could make. Moreover if I experience something triggering most average people don't get this is a very good place for me to vent. I think being severely suicidal is kind of a (negative) unique experience. I think it is for other people hard to imagine how strong this desperation can feel. Suicidality is a state of mind which is hard to describe and probably different people experience it with different nuances. Not sure if there are different types of suicidality? Maybe that is an idea for another thread. Obviously one has to differentiate between the intensity of suicidal thoughts.

Don't know more intricate things to say. Maybe you can add something to the conversation?

 

[symphony]

Hmmm. I'm not sure I would mention SS in particular. At various points this forum has been pretty important to me but I don't feel connected here enough to include it as part of my identity. Depression and suicide, though, absolutely are. This is kinda just an offshoot of that for me. Like it's one degree removed from being directly part of my identity.

Moreover if I experience something triggering most average people don't get this is a very good place for me to vent. I think being severely suicidal is kind of a (negative) unique experience. I think it is for other people hard to imagine how strong this desperation can feel. Suicidality is a state of mind which is hard to describe and probably different people experience it with different nuances.

I agree wholeheartedly. Sometimes it seems like there's a massive, unbridgeable gap between us and those who don't know what it's like to be truly suicidal. It's hard for humans to empathize with things they can't understand, and for most humans, suicide is one of those things.

So to the extent suicidality is part of my identity, I guess that's a part than can really only be shared and understood in a few select places, SS included.

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

I identify only as an astolfo plushie

 

[self.destractive]

not at all. i think when someone solidifies their suicidal ideation/nihilism/pessimism into their identity they can become whiny and hard to be around ( at least in my personal experience ). i also think at that point, recovery becomes significantly harder, if you choose to recover. if you become your scary thoughts, you arent going to be very fun at parties, lets just say. there is a huge difference between being openly acknowledging them though, rather than taking them on in your persona though.

for me its sometimes hard to skirt around the topic, ive been chronically suicidal for some time now, and i was always in and out of different types of treatment in highschool. its a difficult topic to avoid when you disappear for months on end and your friends are wondering where the hell you ran off to - but i believe there are ways to explain things that don't drag others down

like - "Oh, I struggle with suicidal thoughts and mental health" vs. a whole unhinged rant about how much the world sucks and has fucked ya over and how everything is terrible and will never stop being terrible

 

[noname223]

not at all. i think when someone solidifies their suicidal ideation/nihilism/pessimism into their identity they can become whiny and hard to be around ( at least in my personal experience ). i also think at that point, recovery becomes significantly harder, if you choose to recover. if you become your scary thoughts, you arent going to be very fun at parties, lets just say. there is a huge difference between being openly acknowledging them though, rather than taking them on in your persona though.

for me its sometimes hard to skirt around the topic, ive been chronically suicidal for some time now, and i was always in and out of different types of treatment in highschool. its a difficult topic to avoid when you disappear for months on end and your friends are wondering where the hell you ran off to - but i believe there are ways to explain things that don't drag others down

like - "Oh, I struggle with suicidal thoughts and mental health" vs. a whole unhinged rant about how much the world sucks and has fucked ya over and how everything is terrible and will never stop being terrible

Interesting insights. My personal experience is different but I think this highly depends on the individual and you could be right.

 

[Julgran]

Maybe we could imagine the following hypothetical scenario. You meet a person that does not know anything about you. You promise each other to tell the other one everything about your personality while being fully honest. Is explaining you are part of a suicide forum here necessary?

For me personally telling I am longterm suicidal would be pretty essential. This forum probably too. I spend a lot of time in it every evening. It is like a ritual before I go to bed it calms me down and lets me become reflective. I think especially longterm members are more likely to answer the question with yes.

I often think about this forum. Which new threads I could make. Moreover if I experience something triggering most average people don't get this is a very good place for me to vent. I think being severely suicidal is kind of a (negative) unique experience. I think it is for other people hard to imagine how strong this desperation can feel. Suicidality is a state of mind which is hard to describe and probably different people experience it with different nuances. Not sure if there are different types of suicidality? Maybe that is an idea for another thread. Obviously one has to differentiate between the intensity of suicidal thoughts.

Don't know more intricate things to say. Maybe you can add something to the conversation?

Is the hypothetical scenario like a date? I would assume that telling the other person that you are suicidal may make them turn their back towards you. Similarly, if you meet a new friend and tell them that you are suicidal, they may try to change the subject or leave you to yourself. There's simply too much stigma attached to the idea of suicide, I believe.

However, in case someone is wondering why you haven't done much with your life during the last few years, you could simply tell them that you have been dealing with severe personal problems, and that you have had to focus all your attention towards them - instead of mentioning the suicidal ideation specifically.

In the worst case, this new person can catastrophize and start thinking that they will find you dead one day, and don't want to be responsible for handling it.

 

[FuneralCry]

For me, being suicidal is all that I know, I will always be suicidal and I have never wanted to live. I would never tell others about wanting to die. I do not see it as a good idea as after all, we live in a world where suicide is so stigmatised and of course non suicidal people would never be able to understand. Telling people that I want to be gone would only be beneficial if the option of euthanasia is available and then they would have no choice but to accept my decision.

 

[come to dust]

Yes. I have known I was suicidal as early as I have known most things about me. it is an unchanging fact of my life

 

[hungry_ghost]

Nope. In fact, I've been trying lately to discern between my true, innate identity and the false impressions of an identity that the matrix has imposed onto me.

Not all of our thoughts and perceptions are our own.

 

[ghqkiiia2]

I think I would tell, while not specifically named SS.
As a awful PhD students, all most all my smart friends and our wise supervisors admit that they all had different degrees of Suicidal Intentions in a certain period of their live.
So I am kind of used to this kind of openly atmosphere..

 

[lofticries]

'You promise each other to tell the other one everything about your personality while being fully honest. '

I know this is a hypothetical situation but hell to the no.

I don't think I make being suicidal part of my identity. Nor my depression or anxiety. I try to come off as normal as possible to others. With the exception of my parents who already know I'm in deep shit.

 

[Symbiote]

Sure, my dating profile says that I enjoy long walks off a short pier, my only friends are all suicidal, and my cocktail of choice is Nembutal. Ladies just swoon all over me.

 

[TAW122]

I would be very wary of revealing such a private part of my life, not just because I didn't want to be socially ostracized, but because I don't want pro-life busybodies to interfere and intervene in my day to day life. Day to day life general sucks and is difficult enough with the challenges one face everyday but to compound that with the invasion of privacy, infringment of civil liberties under the guise of help, and financial ruin is not something that I wish to take in this shitty existence.

 

[whywere]

Absolutely, as I have had 2 attempts, and have massive depression, BPD, the whole works, and being able to be with kind and caring souls who understand is so essential to me.

I love, care and want only the finest for each and every person here, no matter anything. We are all the same.

Walter

 

[NSA]

I wouldn't call it an identity, but this is the only "social media" I participate in any more. I belong to several different forums for various hobbies, but it's increasingly difficult to interact with people there. I feel "fake" when I do, if that makes any sense. I don't even talk that much here, but it still feels more "real" than anywhere else.

Lol no on the "tell each other everything" thing though. Maybe it's my specific trauma talking, but it's unfathomable to me that people can trust each other so much. Must be nice if you've got it.

 

[Sans]

Not really, since I can't exactly go around telling people I'm part of a suicide forum. You never know who's going to rat you out and get you sent to a concentration camp "mental hospital".

 

[rancidJLJL]

Maybe we could imagine the following hypothetical scenario. You meet a person that does not know anything about you. You promise each other to tell the other one everything about your personality while being fully honest. Is explaining you are part of a suicide forum here necessary?

For me personally telling I am longterm suicidal would be pretty essential. This forum probably too. I spend a lot of time in it every evening. It is like a ritual before I go to bed it calms me down and lets me become reflective. I think especially longterm members are more likely to answer the question with yes.

I often think about this forum. Which new threads I could make. Moreover if I experience something triggering most average people don't get this is a very good place for me to vent. I think being severely suicidal is kind of a (negative) unique experience. I think it is for other people hard to imagine how strong this desperation can feel. Suicidality is a state of mind which is hard to describe and probably different people experience it with different nuances. Not sure if there are different types of suicidality? Maybe that is an idea for another thread. Obviously one has to differentiate between the intensity of suicidal thoughts.

Don't know more intricate things to say. Maybe you can add something to the conversation?

I certainly consider being pro choice and long term suicidal part of my identity. Generally dont tell people though as they always take pity on me and act like its something wrong when im actually quite proud of it.

 

[littlelungs]

I've never thought of being part of a suicide forum as part of my identity, and it's definitely not something I would ever mention to anyone, lest people try to "save" me or tell me the same old bullshit I've heard a thousand times or try to take away my autonomy or guilt me into feeling obligated to continue to suffer to make other people happy or what have you.

Being suicidal in general, however, is something I've experienced since I was a child (first attempt was at 8 years old), so I can't imagine not being suicidal because it's so deeply ingrained – even before shit really hit the fan and everything just continued to hit new lows as the years went on, being alive has always been so inherently uncomfortable. Being suicidal is not my identity, but I also feel like I wouldn't be me anymore if I wasn't, if that makes sense. I just don't know any other way, and if I suddenly wasn't suicidal anymore, I don't think I would even know what to with that... I've just never planned or expected to live a long life.

 

[Skathon]

Being suicidal is one of the core aspects of my personality, yet being a member of this (or any other) forum is not.

 

[Hirokami]

Being on this forum in itself isn't part of my identity. Though, what being on here represents is part of it. I have depression, suicidal thoughts, and I'm pro-choice.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Suicide is my identity and you guys are just along for the ride.

 

[Zegers]

Some things are personal and should be kept to oneself. I only talk about this with like-minded people.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Just don't tell my mum!

 

[libbitour]

Hmmm interesting but no not really

 

[VirtualSnow]

I'm not even relevant enough in here to consider it part of my identity, but it does explain some things about me.

 

[whatevs]

I would definitely demand from a close relationship that we could talk about suicidality and thus about the forum.

 

[Euthanza]

Sure, my dating profile says that I enjoy long walks off a short pier, my only friends are all suicidal, and my cocktail of choice is Nembutal. Ladies just swoon all over me.

Idk how to react on this, not on first date but if you notice you shall find out soon