Discussion Do normal people have suicidal ideation?

[VampQueen]

My sister, her bf, my mom, and my brothers, have all told me that they have thought about suicide before. But I just don't believe them. If they've had suicidal thoughts, it definitely wasn't to my extent. I mean I've attempted multiple times, been to psych wards multipule times. Been in therapy. Been on meds since 2018.

I feel that there is absolutely no way that the "suicidal thoughts" they've had are nothing but an, unwanted, intrusive thought. Maybe im being an asshole and undermining their experiences and emotions.

 

[AbsentMindedHuman]

I hate to sound negative, but they probably said they did just so you would feel better and maybe connect with them more. People never know what to say around people like us that are truly struggling.

 

[VampQueen]

I hate to sound negative, but they probably said they did just so you would feel better and maybe connect with them more. People never know what to say around people like us that are truly struggling.

I WAS THINKING THAT TOO!!!!

 

[AbsentMindedHuman]

It's like when someone gets annoyed or angry about something and does the finger gun in their mouth. They do it because other people do it and they think it's funny. It's not. That's why I don't talk to anyone about how I feel unless I'm here. Seems like regardless of their intentions, what they say usually has no merit and is so far off the mark it borders comical. They CANT understand unless they have lived it.

 

[Coffeandamug]

In my experience no, they don't. They might have had "that one week of that year" but it went away pretty quickly. I know that because I have asked a lot of friends over the years on the subject.

 

[UKscotty]

I doubt it, maybe people think once in a while I'll kill myself but it won't last.

A normal healthy mind wants to survive and thrive. Only someone will depression will truly know suicidal thoughts.

 

[zengiraffe]

I don't believe in "healthy" and "unhealthy" minds. There are minds. Some want to kill themselves. I think that's fine. We're the product of like a billion years of evolution, that something like 50% of us seriously think about killing ourselves at some point of our lives is not just some whacky coincidence. It's normal. Albert Camus argued that "Should I kill myself?" is the only important philosophical question to be answered, because if the answer is "yes" is renders all other philosophical questions meaningless. And philosophers have argued for millennia whether the answer should be yes or no.

 

[fivebeyond]

I feel that there is absolutely no way that the "suicidal thoughts" they've had are nothing but an, unwanted, intrusive thought.

Definitely agree here.

 

[Socrates Respecter]

I don't believe in "healthy" and "unhealthy" minds. There are minds. Some want to kill themselves. I think that's fine. We're the product of like a billion years of evolution, that something like 50% of us seriously think about killing ourselves at some point of our lives is not just some whacky coincidence. It's normal. Albert Camus argued that "Should I kill myself?" is the only important philosophical question to be answered, because if the answer is "yes" is renders all other philosophical questions meaningless. And philosophers have argued for millennia whether the answer should be yes or no.

Very true. No such thing as "normal people". Who decides what the norm is? The majority of society. It's simply arbitrary. People are all different and it doesn't mean some are normal and some are not. Of course most people think about suicide to some degree during the course of their lives.

 

[a.hamza.13]

It doesn't necessarily the case that only abnormal or unhealthy people have suicidal thoughts. There were many normal people like Lisette Nigot, David Goodall, Laura Henkel and many others who chose death on rational basis.
We're depressed and want to die doesn't mean we're abnormal. There are many great people in the history like Alan Turing, Rudolf Diesel (Not confirmed but likely), Marilyn Monroe and other countless people who were far more successful than normal people who chose death as a choice.
Most people commit suicide from depression but what's the root of depression? It's the way life and the system of this world is made. Examine a person's life from its birth to death, you'll see it's based on pain and suffering. So, it's natural to be depressed. Arthur Schopenhauer have shed light on this unignorable aspect of life very well. You ought to read him. Then, why do people live? They live on the basis of their perceptions of life. They want to live to follow the tradition. They don't want their illusions to be destroyed. Why are we suicidal? We're suicidal because we know that existence is the root of pain and suffering. Also, it's unnecessary at all. What would differ if nothing would exist at all? What about the pleasures of life?

Pleasure is never as pleasant as we expected it to be and pain is always more painful. The pain in the world always outweighs the pleasure. If you don't believe it, compare the respective feelings of two animals, one of which is eating the other.

Arthur Schopenhauer
We're suicidal doesn't mean we're abnormal but we see the world from a different perspective and see death as the ultimate solution. They just can't digest our perception of life and death. Death isn't something people normally think about it. It's the ultimate gift from God or whatever is there.

Death may be the greatest of all human blessings.

Socrates
Note: My purpose isn't strictly to promote suicide and death at all. I just want to make sense of what our perception of death is.

 

[Kalista]

yes, 'normal' people think about suicide. having suicidal ideation is not exclusive to a specific group of people. everyone can end up having them. you don't need to be going to therapy to have the thoughts.

you're comparing your experience with family members which is drastically different based on what you've said, and it makes you believe your situation is more of a cause to think about suicide. which is a wrong perspective because you don't know what they have thought or felt at the time.

if they did lie about having those thoughts, the possibility of truth doesn't stop with them. your family aren't the only people in this world. many others may give you the same answer which will be true (even if you don't believe it) whether they went to therapy or have gotten checked in or not.

consider the details you're not seeing and feeling. try to question why and how it happened to them.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

It depends how you define "normal" but, if you're referring to the general population, no. They don't have suicidal ideation. They all want to experience long lives and die as old as possible. None of them ever consider suicide as a solution to their issues. They only think about pushing forward in life

 

[ThatGuyOverThere]

I assume that Most people do, but due to there child hoods, they are raised up with values that value life, and which result in people seeking out self soothing activities to alleviate the pain that results in such thoughts, It's most likely why most people are terminally online and are dopamine addicts.

 

[3/4Dead]

If by normal you mean non-ill (mentally or physically) people then yes, I'm pretty sure. Plenty of people have a catastrophic event occur and feel that the only way out is suicide, or have brief intrusive thoughts of it, at a time in their life. All of the happiest people I've ever met cite suicidality as a low point in their lives.

 

[IWishIWasAFlower]

I would assume quite a few of people have suicidal thoughts at least once in their life. Probably way more with passive thoughts than actual planing tho.

 

[timetodie24]

I think a lot of people have suicidal thoughts at some point. As it can affect people in different forms. Passive ideation is much more common, many people will think 'i'd be better off dead' without seriously considering or planning, others it may be random intrusive thoughts but they don't want to act on them. People can have them despite being 'healthy' or 'normal' when going through a rough patch. For example, someone may consider ctb after a breakup or bereavement, come really close to it or attempt but then recover and never seriously consider it again. Sometimes people may even have thoughts out of morbid curiosity , just wondering what it'd be like to end their life for no particular reason.

I think fewer people get what it's like to be actively and/or long term suicidal. But so many people will at least think about it.

 

[AndroidAmongHumans]

normal people tend to have suicidal thoughts as theoretical ideas, stuff like "what if a lion chewed off my leg and I was in the middle of nowhere and it was infected, so I just had to kill myself". they don't actually fantasize about it or personally wish for it or try to make it happen.

 

[enduringwinter]

Absolutely, it's very normal. Only you guys (westerners) are completely forbidden from ever talking about it lest you get institutionalised. In my part of the world if you fail an attempt you go back to work the next day.

 

[msesis]

I used to be normal (i.e. happy). Which means I had struggles and traumas like anyone else but for the most part had goals and coping mechanisms and things to look forward to. Suicide was only ever an intrusive thought. It wasn't something I planned or researched or genuinely considered. I used to say I would never kill myself. I think normal people are generally happy. I know because I was. Everything was so light. It made sense how most people acted. It made sense how people could go day after day. But in the end of course it's a spectrum. I just think most people don't actively ideate like we do.

 

[VampQueen]

I used to be normal (i.e. happy). Which means I had struggles and traumas like anyone else but for the most part had goals and coping mechanisms and things to look forward to. Suicide was only ever an intrusive thought. It wasn't something I planned or researched or genuinely considered. I used to say I would never kill myself. I think normal people are generally happy. I know because I was. Everything was so light. It made sense how most people acted. It made sense how people could go day after day. But in the end of course it's a spectrum. I just think most people don't actively ideate like we do.

I don't even remember what it was like not being suicidal. I don't remember my old, bubbly self. Now I've just become this shell of what I used to be.

 

[msesis]

I don't even remember what it was like not being suicidal. I don't remember my old, bubbly self. Now I've just become this shell of what I used to be.

It's been a long time for me too. Sometimes I don't remember how it felt, I just remember that it was like that.

 

[needthebus]

i think normal people have passing thoughts when things get bad like "i just wish i weren't here" at their lowest moments for 5 seconds, then the next day they think "i can't believe i had a suicidal thought!"

whereas real suicidal people debate which method to use, when, think about pain levels, are concerned about it failing, and debate whether to maintain relationships because of the impact on others

normal person "i just lost my job and my wife left me for my boss, i am going to end it" ----next----day---> "i need to go jogging and get some breakfast"

not normal person "i have a headache and someone was mean to me today. should i end it in a week from now or a month from now?" ---next--day--> "I'll do it in 4 weeks."

it's not like there's just two categories of people, but there a large number of people with brief fleeting suicidal thoughts when in a really bad state, and no, it's nothing like being really suicidal

 

[sugarb]

My sister, her bf, my mom, and my brothers, have all told me that they have thought about suicide before. But I just don't believe them. If they've had suicidal thoughts, it definitely wasn't to my extent. I mean I've attempted multiple times, been to psych wards multipule times. Been in therapy. Been on meds since 2018.

I feel that there is absolutely no way that the "suicidal thoughts" they've had are nothing but an, unwanted, intrusive thought. Maybe im being an asshole and undermining their experiences and emotions.

I learned from my dad yesterday that my mom apparently has/had suicidal thoughts; big part of why they didn't keep guns in the house, apparently. They're divorced so he might've not been entirely truthful but I doubt that's the case given the tone of the conversation

She's a very normal seeming person but given where I am, the bits of her inner feelings I've seen, and how my dad's not much for the self harm side of depression I believe she's struggled with it

 

[betternever2havbeen]

normal people tend to have suicidal thoughts as theoretical ideas, stuff like "what if a lion chewed off my leg and I was in the middle of nowhere and it was infected, so I just had to kill myself". they don't actually fantasize about it or personally wish for it or try to make it happen.

Hmm do they really think of theoretical things like that even? Seems like the sort of stuff we'd say not the normies. Maybe if they're high I'm not sure they think about these things until they happen as they'd see it as a waste of time. Worrying about things that might not happen is a sign of anxiety (to them) so they're unlikely to even go there. I could be wrong, I just don't know very many deep people who contemplate these things in the outside world.

I have come across some people online who spout stuff about suicide but they seem so anti-suicide at the same time so I really do wonder if they've genuinely ever thought about it. I don't wish to invalidate them though as it's not really for me to say they've not been low enough. And of course there are those that no longer have suicidal ideation but did-it's just hard for me to understand as mine has never really gone away. Everyone's journey is different though I suppose. I try to keep open-minded as everyone but immediate family probably wouldn't guess the struggles I've had with depression.

 

[Forever Sleep]

If someone says they have considered suicide then, I imagine they have- however briefly. It seems kind of likely almost if they have gone through a very difficult life event at some point.

I suppose there must be something different about them though- if they managed to shake those feelings off. Maybe they were frightened by them because at their core, they still saw value in their own life. As you say- if someone experiences these thoughts as intrusive and unwelcome, they're likely going to try harder to banish them. Maybe they just had more positive stuff going on or, at least hope of positive things in life- which gave them a clearer idea of what to aim for to turn things around.

I don't think ideation is all about how bad things are in someone's life. I think it also depends on how that person sees life and how much hope they have. Without hope, it's so hard to motivate ourselves to change.

Still, it's difficult. I guess none of us really know how another person feels. Even here, we likely experience ideation differently.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Normal people don't have suicidal ideation.

We have to ask what triggers can have suicidal ideation as a result? I highly doubt that anyone is suicidal by birth (exception: possible genetic defects).

When someone is generally healthy, lives a good life, everything works out for them in their favor, with the avg ups and downs of life but generally it's an "up-trend" - then why should this person develop suicial ideation? It's against how life is designed by nature.

If those "good things" don't work out for someone incl. bad health, traumatic events and so on - then why would someone not consider ending this misery earlier and develop suicidal ideation?

 

[dinosavr]

The thing is many people confuse the will to kill yourself with the will to die (in an accident or from a disease) or even the will to disappear. Suicide is not easy and you really have to be fucked up quite much to get to this point in my opinion.

**Of course it doesn't change the fact that wanting to die or disappear are easy and normal thoughts. Obviously they often require adequate treatment too.

 

[Apathy79]

I think an awful lot of teenagers and young adults have suicidal thoughts at some point, most of which pass as a phase. I think if people older than about 25 or 30 are having suicidal thoughts, it's probably serious most of the time. I imagine most people you're talking to are probably referring to thoughts in the first category.

 

[rozeske]

The degree of suicidal ideation can vary with each suicidal person. We are not all in the same level. One suicidal person may actively be considering it while another will be passively considering it. Doesn't mean they are not suicidal. But most of your average population isn't really considering to actually kill themselves when they "kill me now!" or "if x,y,z happens am gonna kill myself!". They are not really looking to end their lifes nor do they consider suicide as a valid option. It has in a way became a figure of speech. It has nothing to do with wanting to die. Then they mistake it for actually being suicidal and come to you, an actively suicidal person, and tell you "oh I have suicidal thoughts a lot of the time, most people do, but it always passes, you will be fine, just know that it will pass"

 

[thebelljarrr]

I wouldn't call it normal & abnormal, I think anyone can have these thoughts, but not to the same degree, only some minds can come to prefer & then suicide. Only few can come to understand. Someone who may seem "normal" to you today may kill himself tomorrow. Like someone else here said, many great people chose death over their "normal" & "happy" lives. It doesn't work that way.