Did not study for SAT and AP exams

[qpsns]

So I have started to study for the SATs and APs(Calculus BC, Chemistry, Physics 1 and 2), even though there is 1 month left for these exams.
I was unable to study for unknown reasons. I had 5 months to study, but I just was unable to study. I kept doing distracting things. Maybe it was because of my depression. Maybe it was because of the guilt that I lost $5000.
But anyways I was unable to study, so I have 1 month left now. I don't have the motivation to study, because even if I study now, I wouldn't be able to get a good score.
Since I will be applying to college in August 2022, I have another chance for SATs and APs next year. I can just take these exams next year.
But the problem is, my parents wouldn't allow me to not take it this year. They told me to do my best this year, and try again next year. The problem is, they assume I would get a 4 on the AP subjects and at least 1500 on the SATs. Then they would expect me to get a 5 and a 1600 next year.
I don't know what to do. They always expect that I am hard working, but if I tell them that I can't take them this year, that will disappoint them a lot. And it would waste their money, since I cannot get a refund for SATs and APs now.
I really regret not studying, and I wish I can just ctb.
What should I do?

 

[Cathy Ames]

Level with your parents. See if you can get an SAT prep course (yes, it will cost money). Concentrate on that and possibly whichever AP you think you can do best on.

I promise you, the vast majority of parents would FAR rather have their child fail in school and still be alive rather than having their child CTB. There is also the possibility of taking a gap year before college so that you can get some extra support that will help you do better once you get there.

 

[whatevs]

TELL THEM EVERYTHING. I don't want to see you kill yourself over this. You're a kid, confide in the adults in your life. Be open and honest about your suicidal ideation too, you will see how quickly they stop being pushy about your academic performance.

 

[Cathy Ames]

TELL THEM EVERYTHING. I don't want to see you kill yourself over this. You're a kid, confide in the adults in your life. Be open and honest about your suicidal ideation too, you will see how quickly they stop being pushy about your academic performance.

Yes, that is better advice than mine, OP.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

Are your parents educated American adults ?

Are they aware major national government agencies project climate collapse before the theoretical date you could collect your pension?

The AP courses can help to avoid a lot of debt but I wouldn't take all of this too seriously

 

[qpsns]

Are your parents educated American adults ?

Are they aware major national government agencies project climate collapse before the theoretical date you could collect your pension?

The AP courses can help to avoid a lot of debt but I wouldn't take all of this too seriously

They're Asians

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

They're Asians

I'm not going to lie
Based on your post I assumed they were Asians , because you mentioned they expected 1600. Which is the perfect score if I remember

I'm not bullshitting. When I read your post I was like this guy has to have Asian parents . Just a dose of truth

 

[BreakingTheHabit]

I don't have any advice for the parent situation, but Khan Academy provides good practice and learning material for the SAT and AP tests. It's free too. You said that you aren't motivated but you can get a lot done within a month, although it will be difficult with the feelings you have right now. I'd recommend starting now and doing the best that you can.

I have a feeling that your parents would disagree, but I highly suggest going to community college first for two years then transferring over to an university. It'll be significantly cheaper especially if your parents make you pay for it and when you transfer, your SAT score won't really matter at that point.

 

[Salvation_]

Your AP Exams don't matter because you're not obligated to send the scores to Collegeboard. Focus on SAT if you want.

 

[waitingforrest]

I absolutely despise studying for exams, the stress you feel must be immense. Maybe just try studying for one exam instead of all of them, perhaps the one you feel most confident on. But please don't try to cram, the after effects and stress isn't worth it.

It might not be easy to tell your parents that this is too much for you, asian parents can sometimes live up to the stereotypes. It can make trying to talk about anything emotional more difficult.

I used to tell myself that grades don't matter and is not worth ctb, but as much as I tell myself that, I can't help but feel shame when I fail a exam.

Just consider telling your parents how this is effecting you, they might not understand but letting them know that something is negatively effecting you can be a start.

Perhaps ask for a mental break from all the constant stress of academics because pushing yourself too hard can lead to burnout.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with all this stress, it can feel like ctb is a escape from all the stresses.