Decisions you don’t think you’ll ever have to make

[february in alaska]

Logistical shit that I've never planned out before because I never even thought about it. Little insignificant choices that feel really big right about now

Like, picking out a hotel and which room you're going to die in. Figuring out what you'll be wearing. I don't even know if I should be wearing makeup or not. Probably not, right? I keep looking at the weather forecast too. It's going to be bright sunny skies.

I know none of it really matters, none of it is going to mean a thing in a couple days, but I still have to make these stupid little choices with everything I do and I can't stand it. Three days to go

 

[sserafim]

NEET or rope

I always thought I'd just somehow be dead and never have to ctb myself

 

[february in alaska]

NEET or rope

I always thought I'd just somehow be dead and never have to ctb myself

I can relate to this. I genuinely never thought I would even make it to 18. It's a shame that "giving up" takes so much planning and energy and work, you can't just decide one day that you're done living and magically disappear from the world