Venting Death is the only way to escape this hellhole

[PoisonedOxygen]

So today has been another day I've heard that I'm nothing more than a problem. Nothing new really. Thank god the problem will be gone hopefully in a couple weeks or so. My mother has been physically and mentally abusing me since I was a child. After a couple of years it worsened and I can undoubtedly say I can feel my mind going insane. She has been saying things like "if I want to end my life than better don't do it at home because my remains will need to be cleaned", or that "she regrets she didn't choose abortion" already two years ago. I don't know how I managed to keep living but surely I should've ended this madness a long time ago. I believe I was birthed by satan himself, and this is a true example that a human can actually give and take life if you're only able to give birth and then abuse your child to the point that it commits suicide. The most funny part about this is that she''ll for sure act and cry at my funeral. I can already imagine her saying "I don't know what could've led to this". She sometimes resembles to me what a reincarnation of a female Ted Bundy would look like, able to fool everyone.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds so horrible what you've been through, it disgusts me how humans force life into this world just to treat that person so terribly, I hope that you find freedom from the hell that is existence.

 

[Gonnerr]

I hope you escape peacefully that hellhole that is society and most human being.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Very sad to read this. Your mother must be truly terrible and there seems to be no love at all. Wish you all the best and may you finda peaceful and easy way to exit this horrific life.

 

[thrutrekfinaly]

There are ways out, me and my wife are working on creating a place for ppl like us . I still plan on ctb but she will finish what I started once I know I've created a save haven for us who long to get out of the society. If your able to hang in there that'll be great, if not I wish you peace. Existing isn't for everyone. My wife also tried to "exit" once and she feels heartbroken for those that also feel trapped in existence. We plan to creat a place that will get us all out of this bell hole. While she is no longer suicidal she still remembers what it felt like before she tried. She truely is an angel on earth I swear it.

We gunna buy some land and work it so others can live rent free off of it, turn it into a garden. When you pass on we will plant a tree with your name on it as a tombstone (my idea). It'll take some time and work but we are closing in on some land now, need a bit more money as well. Ppl could also visit just to get away from it all for a while like a breath of fresh air.

But I agree, you've had a hard life, abd society is selfish abd corrupt. But your not alone (I know that means nothing to most of us) but trust me when I say I understand how you feel and I can't wait for my turn to walk through the exit door.

 

[ringo99]

Omg that's awful! I'm so sorry you're going through such a hellish time. If you do decide to ctb discreetly make recordings of your mom's abusive behavior if possible and ensure they end up in the hands of the police after you're gone. This is assuming you're looking for some payback

 

[Gonnerr]

There are ways out, me and my wife are working on creating a place for ppl like us . I still plan on ctb but she will finish what I started once I know I've created a save haven for us who long to get out of the society. If your able to hang in there that'll be great, if not I wish you peace. Existing isn't for everyone. My wife also tried to "exit" once and she feels heartbroken for those that also feel trapped in existence. We plan to creat a place that will get us all out of this bell hole. While she is no longer suicidal she still remembers what it felt like before she tried. She truely is an angel on earth I swear it.

We gunna buy some land and work it so others can live rent free off of it, turn it into a garden. When you pass on we will plant a tree with your name on it as a tombstone (my idea). It'll take some time and work but we are closing in on some land now, need a bit more money as well. Ppl could also visit just to get away from it all for a while like a breath of fresh air.

But I agree, you've had a hard life, abd society is selfish abd corrupt. But your not alone (I know that means nothing to most of us) but trust me when I say I understand how you feel and I can't wait for my turn to walk through the exit door.

Great idea , which country are you from? I might be interested in joining and contributing if you bring that idea into reality.

 

[lookingforsanctuary]

I love the sound of the sanctuary your wife and you are building.

 

[thrutrekfinaly]

In the US we will be attempting to build it in mountains of Georgia. Our back up will be NC . Georgia is looking real good though. The community will also pull together and use money together so we can all afford healthcare if needed.

Great idea , which country are you from? I might be interested in joining and contributing if you bring that idea into reality.

In the US we will be attempting to build it in mountains of Georgia. Our back up will be NC . Georgia is looking real good though. The community will also pull together and use money together so we can all afford healthcare if needed.