Venting DEATH & BEAUTY

[rozeske]

What is the obsession of society feeling more grief over beautiful people dying, especially when it's suicide. I mean, shouldn't we feel sorry for someone dying, just for a human being, regardless of their rank on society's beauty standard? It's quite common to hear people saying 'oh they were such a beautiful person, it's so sad they died'. 'Oh they were such a beautiful person, it's so sad they took their life, such a waste'. Can't we just mourn the life that is been lost? Is it really that we don't have any other "criteria" to be sad about over being wasted away? I just don't get it. You never see people feeling sorry for the deceased that wasn't as "beautiful" in life. What? a beautiful person shouldn't have to die but it's "ok" for an "ugly" person to vanish? They're better off dead right? Is that it? Can the rest of us get somewhat of an equal sympathy?

It's not just death. No one wants anything bad happening if the person is good looking. Whenever people see a person seemingly healthy in the past that "all of a sudden" "lost it" or "went crazy", their initial response is "she was alright until just recently, whatever happened to her? oh this is so sad, she was such a beautiful woman". I swear there is such a strong worship like obsession over beautiful people!

Anyways, what made me think all of this was, i was watching the news and on the recent plane crash in Brazil, a woman who lost her daughter was being interviewed, I can only hear the translation but it was that same thing yet again. "My daughter was 1.7 meter, she was strong and beautiful, you can see her pictures on the internet......"

P.S.
I don't have anything against beautiful people :)
May all the victims of the crash rest in peace, all the beautiful and not so beautiful ones.

 

[dolemitedrums]

I think maybe it's just more intriguing.

There's an example given in novel and screenwriting etc. In version 1 a guy goes to Vegas and bets his whole life savings on the roulette wheel, he loses, then goes home and kills himself. In version 2, the same guy wins the roulette spin and doubles his fortune, then goes home and kills himself. Version 2 is the movie that will immediately hook people into watching more. I think when a good looking person ends their life it's a little bit like that.

 

[potablewater784]

I agree that the regret we feel when someone dies should certainly not depend on their physical appearance. However, I feel that part of the reason people say this is that they believe beautiful people to have better lives (which could very well be true, considering how much people judge on looks). So, it's not necessarily that being beautiful makes the suicide more tragic, but it is more surprising.

In reality, this is probably only part of the reason. I'm sure a large part of it is just that people assign worth based on beauty (as you mention)

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's sadly true. Also, when people go missing. Look at the Gabby Petito case- that went worldwide. Not to say that the disappearance and later discovered murder of a person shouldn't go worldwide but it's kind of sad- that if you're ugly or of an ethnic minority even- people may not trouble themselves so much to care or even look for you.

To be honest, even my Dad pisses me off in this regard. If he happens to talk about a woman, there will usually be a tag line on how attractive they are. Not that my Dad's some pervert but I think women especially are valued according to their looks. I know the incel community is going to reject that.

To be fair, I haven't experienced it so much the other way around. Maybe if a man is especially attractive, people can't help themselves but mention it but I've often heard with regards to women- 'She's nothing to look at...' Then they sometimes realise what they've just said and follow up by saying: 'not that that matters,' well- why f*cking say it then?!! But yeah, regardless of gender- it's true. It's sad that one life gets valued over another.

I suppose it's the starkest contrast though- soneone beautiful becoming a corpse. It means they avoid old age though too. They'll always be young and beautiful in people's minds. I wonder if anyone CTB with that as a motive.

 

[Lost Magic]

When Marilyn Monroe died a lot of people said that she was too talented and beautiful. Many people negate her severe depression by conspiratorially saying that she was murdered. I think a lot of the time people just want to have a perfect image to idolise. But that is just an illusion. They are just flawed human beings like the rest of us.

 

[notprettyenough]

As an "attractive person" I hate this a lot too. I know i have no right to complain, but it makes me feel like my only value is In regards to my looks, especially as a woman, it feels like it's the only thing I'm worth.

I feel like it's the only thing people care about and else I am worthless. I crave genuine comnection and I've met a lot of people (not only men, but people in general) who only care about my apperence and else would check put other girls in a relationship anyways. The worst part is I know when i get older, why beauty will fade and I will be officially worthless.

I grew up feeling unattractive, and I assumed it was why I had little friends and no romantic success.

I'm almost 21, female, and ever since i was 14 I've spent countless hours in morning to ger ready, eating disorders, hours shopping, hours every week doing my hair until my arms are in agonizing pain.

I am told my countless people I am attractive, I get lots of success on dating apps and can easily get a guys number if I ask for it, and get asked out a lot.

I'm still lonely. I still don't feel pretty enough. I had a genuine friendship and I lost her after being an idiot while drunk and cutting myself when we were outside.

I had a horrible relationship where despite being pretty, he still wanted other girls and was unfaithful, I get anxious even when he would look around his surroundings as if he was finding the next girl to check out.

I know I can find a good relationship but quite frankly it doesn't fulfill me right now. I'm so tired of looks being the main factor for how I'm treated, my worth, and if people wanna date me.

I wish everyone was blind or looked the same, so we could focus on our personality and not reduce someone to how they look amd if they are "fuckable". I'm scared to be in a relationship bc I'm worried the next person also likes to reduce someone to being "fuckable" based on looks and cant just ignore her looks and not objectify her and not lust over her for something so shallow.

And the worst part is, I have it EASY compared to those who aren't attractive, yet I have self harm issues, drinking issues, had abusive relationships, and can't have male friends due to them always asking me out and leaving my life once I say no, and female friends are hard to keep around for me due to being 1.fucked up, and 2. Very socially awkward