Dark jobs

[GravityUtilizer]

So I'm unemployed and being that my main passion right now is all things suicide I might be inclined to work if there were such a job that dealt with this sort of stuff and not just the making profit for some corp in an entirely unironic, deeply phoney way sort of stuff.

Facebook moderator for instance? (Although ironically of course that would mean working for one of the biggest corps out there...)
Beachy Head Chaplain? (I'd be something of a maverick - 'I lost another one guys, must be something I said...')
I don't know.

Basically surprise surprise regular job sites do not inspire me at all - though I haven't bothered looking on any for a while now - and I need some fresh perspectives.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Crime scene cleaners make alot of money and it's fairly easy to get qualified for it.

 

[AnxietyAttack44]

I considered joining nuns. So after not even praying helps me anymore, ill just hang myself in some old monastery, or forrest around it, far away from my family or dogs finding me. Morbid turn. Sorry

 

[Final Escape]

Crime scene cleaners make alot of money and it's fairly easy to get qualified for it.

They only hire men. I looked into this.

 

[Stavrogin]

I considered joining nuns. So after not even praying helps me anymore, ill just hang myself in some old monastery, or forrest around it, far away from my family or dogs finding me. Morbid turn. Sorry

Being a nun is a kind of death in itself really, as with any ascetic lifestyle; and whether there's a prize at the end of the race, well who knows.

 

[puppy9]

They only hire men. I looked into this.

There's one on YouTube called Crime Scene Cleaning Spaulding Decon. There's female trainees there.

 

[Final Escape]

There's one on YouTube called Crime Scene Cleaning Spaulding Decon. There's female trainees there.

I asked this funeral director lady. She said they prefer men because u gotta lift heavy stuff and bodies. The women weren't working out as well when they tried to hire them.

 

[puppy9]

I asked this funeral director lady. She said they prefer men because u gotta lift heavy stuff and bodies. The women weren't working out as well when they tried to hire them.

Sorry to hear that, and sorry that I recommend this to you; not thinking that you've done a thorough research on this.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I asked this funeral director lady. She said they prefer men because u gotta lift heavy stuff and bodies. The women weren't working out as well when they tried to hire them.

Crime scene cleaners don't arrive until after the body has been removed by emergency services, coroner, etc.

In the US, there are private businesses that do this work, and they're not run by funeral parlors.

I worked in insurance claims, which hire the same businesses. See website for s e r v p r o.

 

[the box is empty]

Growing up, we always had HBO and my mother didn't really censor anything so I would just watch whatever I want. When I was young I watched "Six Feet Under" and I remember I thought I'd be pretty good as a funeral director. I naturally tend to be present at people's worse moments so why not?

 

[Mr2005]

So I'm unemployed and being that my main passion right now is all things suicide I might be inclined to work if there were such a job that dealt with this sort of stuff and not just the making profit for some corp in an entirely unironic, deeply phoney way sort of stuff.

Facebook moderator for instance? (Although ironically of course that would mean working for one of the biggest corps out there...)
Beachy Head Chaplain? (I'd be something of a maverick - 'I lost another one guys, must be something I said...')
I don't know.

Basically surprise surprise regular job sites do not inspire me at all - though I haven't bothered looking on any for a while now - and I need some fresh perspectives.

Passion? Suicide isn't a hobby and if it is seek help

 

[GravityUtilizer]

Passion? Suicide isn't a hobby and if it is seek help

Fair enough. 'Obsession' might be a better word. But I am a pessimist as well as a depressive so I am drawn to dark stuff, as well as wanting to kill myself a lot of the time.

 

[suffering]

I would also like a job that is outside of the evil system. I thought about joining a monastery also, but after some research I arrived at the conclusion that the most monks are twisted creeps so I'd rather join the greedy corporate system where I can at least hope to save some $. If I really have to sell my soul, I'd rather be paid for it.
I would like to be an ethical hitman where I could help people die if they wish (I know I would pay someone to kill me if I could), but that is waaay to risky and complicated.
Moving to Mexico and help sell N would also be ethical, but again too risky.
I'd love to become a con artist to cheat evil people out of their $, but I'm not smart enough.
I'm thinking about becoming a taxi driver, as it seems the kind of job that gives you enough independence and you don't do evil in this world, you're just driving around. But even there you have a lot of expenses with the car and you risk coming in contact with assholes.
Anyway for now I'm just slaving away in a corporation, hoping to save some $ for my peace of mind. It's horrible to know that you have to solid savings to keep yourself alive and safe if you lose your job.

 

[GravityUtilizer]

I would also like a job that is outside of the evil system. I thought about joining a monastery also, but after some research I arrived at the conclusion that the most monks are twisted creeps so I'd rather join the greedy corporate system where I can at least hope to save some $. If I really have to sell my soul, I'd rather be paid for it.
I would like to be an ethical hitman where I could help people die if they wish (I know I would pay someone to kill me if I could), but that is waaay to risky and complicated.
Moving to Mexico and help sell N would also be ethical, but again too risky.
I'd love to become a con artist to cheat evil people out of their $, but I'm not smart enough.
I'm thinking about becoming a taxi driver, as it seems the kind of job that gives you enough independence and you don't do evil in this world, you're just driving around. But even there you have a lot of expenses with the car and you risk coming in contact with assholes.
Anyway for now I'm just slaving away in a corporation, hoping to save some $ for my peace of mind. It's horrible to know that you have to solid savings to keep yourself alive and safe if you lose your job.

Yes and in a similar vein would be an organisation like the Final Exit Network as featured in Louis Theroux's Altered States: Choosing Death. And sorry you're slaving away; I hope you can save enough $ and then get the hell out.

 

[Final Escape]

Crime scene cleaners don't arrive until after the body has been removed by emergency services, coroner, etc.

In the US, there are private businesses that do this work, and they're not run by funeral parlors.

I worked in insurance claims, which hire the same businesses. See website for s e r v p r o.

She was some head person for stuff related to this for the state of Colorado. I wish I could remember what the title was that she called it. She dealt with handling deaths but dang it I can't remember. She said Colorado had a very high suicide rate and this was before Covid. I bet she can barely keep up with all the deaths from the lockdown. She was in some high level gov position I think. Not a funeral director.

 

[Giraffey]

You could become a suicidologist, a sizeable portion of that work involves suicide prevention. But you could investigate the principle that fewer people would commit suicide if they could openly discuss it and access that information without fear of pro-life reprisal.

 

[Isadeth]

Here are a few jobs you might be interested in:

Assistant funeral director
Morgue attendant
Deputy coroner
Peer support at a mental health organization
Crematory operator
Biohazard restoration
Cemetery maintenance
Hearse driver

To name a few.

Most require a minimum of high school diploma or GED, 18+ age, gaining a week or two of training, or depending on the area's policies, one year of training to gain certs. And a valid driver's license.

I hope you find the job you're looking for! Keep plugging in job titles, I'm sure you'll find something. Especially at children's hospitals, morgue attendants have a high turn over rate of 6 months average due to the content getting to people.
If you would like assistance on which career choice to fuel your obsession but help others around you (I'm in the profession myself) I'd be more than happy to help you step by step in what to look for and how to look into certain practices of companies offering jobs.

For example: I was an Assistant Funeral Director for a major corporation in the states. It seemed good at first, until I started reading reviews. I thought nothing of it as most complaints were regarding lawn maintenance or broken mausoleums that needed repaired and cleaned. Fast forward a few months and I witnessed just why everyone hated them. The organization used to be family owned, but they were bought out and expanded. They we bought out by business men, not anyone in the death, dying, or bereavement services. Transporting an individual to the slab to be prepped for viewing I noticed three decedents piled on top of one another, and two just on the floor. It was appalling. They have been cited numerous times for unsafe practices, and an investigation was starting. I got out of there fairly quickly as I didn't want to lose my reputation, licensure, or certifications.

Always look into employers first, but yeah, I'd be more than happy to assist with your search if you can't find anything ♡ best of luck!