CTB or "Some thing else"

[dandan]

in my case, the thing is making about making decision.... on a day by day basis....
I've lived awful hell, even the psychiatrist says he cant help any more... he says, "than life's hard and unfair, and I got what I've got, and I can't change the past".

So either I spend the day complaining, dreaming about drinking my refrigerated N.
OR
Or I focus on trying to build a better version of myself, starting early in the morning going to the gym, today was the 5th day in a row working out.

Im gonna eat now, and continue working at my job, im making progress at it.

I have had very actue suicidal episodes, just want them to stay away while I pursue my project of now building a web-based attractive money game....

if I have no goals, I cant find a reason to live.....


hahaha and met a girl on Tinder, we dated the other day, and today we agreed to become sex partners no strings attached...

 

[Iwantoutrightnow]

Good luck

 

[21Neberg]

I have a lot of admitation for you working out for an entire week!! Keep it up, it shows your strength!

 

[Dead beat dad]

Brother this sounds positive. I sincerely hope the best for you.
DBD

 

[pole]

in my case, the thing is making about making decision.... on a day by day basis....
I've lived awful hell, even the psychiatrist says he cant help any more... he says, "than life's hard and unfair, and I got what I've got, and I can't change the past".

So either I spend the day complaining, dreaming about drinking my refrigerated N.
OR
Or I focus on trying to build a better version of myself, starting early in the morning going to the gym, today was the 5th day in a row working out.

Im gonna eat now, and continue working at my job, im making progress at it.

I have had very actue suicidal episodes, just want them to stay away while I pursue my project of now building a web-based attractive money game....

if I have no goals, I cant find a reason to live.....


hahaha and met a girl on Tinder, we dated the other day, and today we agreed to become sex partners no strings attached...

awh, this acc made me smile lol. that sounds amazing and idk you but im happy you were in such a shitty place and your getting better and have met someone as well. thats amazing. hope it only gets better from here.

 

[dandan]

Brother this sounds positive. I sincerely hope the best for you.
DBD

awh, this acc made me smile lol. that sounds amazing and idk you but im happy you were in such a shitty place and your getting better and have met someone as well. thats amazing. hope it only gets better from here.

Thank you guys, and everybody really,
I wont sing victory, cause I've been in a similar spot couple years ago,
I had a few good months too...

chemistry? some neurons in my head, I dunno
but I dont want more medicine, I dont want electroshocks, I dont want stupid doctors saying I gotta take this I gotta take that...
I wish I had the balls to just fuck them all and do my thing...

I have to find a way