Venting ctb feels like a looming inevitability rather than a choice

[Imgonnadie]

I can't function in this world as a worker drone for the next 20 years doing the same monotonous bullshit. I just can't.

I don't enjoy anything. All my thoughts are just of stress and despair.

I don't want to keep existing here as a loser. People with normal healthy social lives aren't even like the same species to me.

I don't have the motivation to do anything anymore. I feel as though I'll never be successful or happy.

 

[dolphin]

Yeah, I don't want to die but I have to.

 

[TAW122]

I feel like this too. I'm in my late 20's and I don't see much of a future, especially given how the world is now and also financial stability as well as cost of living is an issue for me here.

 

[Orin]

I feel the same. Death is the only certainty in life, thus i seek to control the manner of my exit.

 

[LaBrava]

I can't function in this world as a worker drone for the next 20 years doing the same monotonous bullshit. I just can't.

I don't enjoy anything. All my thoughts are just of stress and despair.

I don't want to keep existing here as a loser. People with normal healthy social lives aren't even like the same species to me.

I don't have the motivation to do anything anymore. I feel as though I'll never be successful or happy.

I feel the same. Work is miserable, stressful, boring and I barely make enough to live. I'll never get ahead at my advanced age. Don't want to die but don't want to carry on like this forever, so it's not really a choice.

 

[TimeToDie]

I absolutely must CTB, yet I linger on unable to finish the job. That seems to be a common problem around here with SI kicking in such that some have been here for a year and yet they are still alive. I definitely don't want to die, though with so many thing wrong, both mentally & physically, there is no other solution available.

I'm older than most on SS and my health isn't great, so I realistically might only live another 20 years even if I did everything possible to prolong life. But what's the point of growing old when that just means even further decline?

 

[WinterIsComing]

Ikr....i don't want to ctb but i don't find much hope.........if i would have to do a terrible job for years then what's the point

 

[Rex2019]

I can't function in this world as a worker drone for the next 20 years doing the same monotonous bullshit. I just can't.

I don't enjoy anything. All my thoughts are just of stress and despair.

I don't want to keep existing here as a loser. People with normal healthy social lives aren't even like the same species to me.

I don't have the motivation to do anything anymore. I feel as though I'll never be successful or happy.

it's sad. maybe next time we'll all be happy.

 

[mathieu]

Yes, the way I see it I'm dying whether I like it or not. I just HAVE to do it.

 

[Scribble Fan]

Feels like being chained down in a deep, dark pit slowly filling up with water for me. Just waiting to drown.

At least I'll be free.

 

[Severen]

I don't want to keep existing here as a loser. People with normal healthy social lives aren't even like the same species to me.

I don't have the motivation to do anything anymore. I feel as though I'll never be successful or happy.

And having a social life is winning? Have you seen humanity, lately? What's so healthy about being normal and having to deal with people who can turn on you, any second? The grass always looks greener on the other side, speaking as someone who has been on both sides.

 

[lululoo]

Yeah, totally relate. Scared to go through with it, but have no choice. Sick, don't want to/can't work, don't want to lie around all alone doing nothing which is the only alternative, since I have no energy and no interests.

 

[Imgonnadie]

And having a social life is winning? Have you seen humanity, lately? What's so healthy about being normal and having to deal with people who can turn on you, any second? The grass always looks greener on the other side, speaking as someone who has been on both sides.

it's a basic need

 

[Severen]

it's a basic need

And if satisfying that basic need, means not being able to satisfy other basic needs? You should watch the movie The Cable Guy. I've had to deal with what most of the main character went through, multiple times for living like a normal and social person...

 

[Xaphous]

I'm forced to suicide because I'm socially isolated and always have been therefore I'm denied everything else in life automatically. My life is purposely restricted and controlled on every level to keep maximum degree of suffering at all times.

 

[Conflicted Cat]

Work- eat- sleep- work- eat- sleep, and being too tired to even enjoy anything with what little free time you do get... What a shitty cycle.

 

[TimeToDie]

And having a social life is winning?

YES! Compared to the alternative it's definitely better. I have the opposite of a social life. I am at home all alone all day every day after day after day. Nobody but me has been in my house for the last 15 days. I haven't gone out to visit anybody in many months. My human interaction in the last week has consisted of nothing more than receiving pizza from the dude at Domino's. Being alone is a very compelling reason to CTB. Either having a social life is winning, or it sucks too and the popular folks should hop on the bus with me.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I can't function in this world as a worker drone for the next 20 years doing the same monotonous bullshit. I just can't.

I don't enjoy anything. All my thoughts are just of stress and despair.

I don't want to keep existing here as a loser. People with normal healthy social lives aren't even like the same species to me.

I don't have the motivation to do anything anymore. I feel as though I'll never be successful or happy.

SAME !!!

I totally feel the same. I don't know how other people function. I hate it here so much.

 

[Nutcase]

Yeah, I've made that same calculation in my head too and on the whole, if my capacity for emotional/mental pain stays the same, add on to that the stresses of day to day life, staying here really doesn't seem worth it, unless it was for a purpose like spreading antinatalism or helping people in desperate circumstances, I don't know how much I could accomplish in my condition though.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

Yeah, I've made that same calculation in my head too and on the whole, if my capacity for emotional/mental pain stays the same, add on to that the stresses of day to day life, staying here really doesn't seem worth it, unless it was for a purpose like spreading antinatalism or helping people in desperate circumstances, I don't know how much I could accomplish in my condition though.

I'm an anti-natalist also. I actually found the old S.S. board on Reddit because of it. After they shut that one down I came here.