Discussion could prolifers help?

[Life_and_Death]

here me out. im not the biggest fan of prolifers as much as the next here but it occurred to me....could they actually be helpful if they softened their tone and change their direction?

im talking they leave the suicidal alone. but hang out in the recovery section. help those that actually want help. and not be so forceful with their point of views and understand the person they are helping has had a hard go of it. obviously this is one of those things that probably isnt going to happen because they are......i have a lot of words and stubborn, ignorant.....is a good place to start. them telling us about suicide is like one of us going into a surgery room and cutting a person open. its just not gonna happen. (unless one of us here is a surgeon in which case cool and im happy for what you do. a lot of lives are saved every day because of you ) im talking they actually open a tab that isnt about how to piss us off instead a tab on how to help, why are people suicidal. actually understand us.

obviously this is all hypothetical but whats your thoughts?

 

[XYZ]

 

[Life_and_Death]

@XYZ lol

 

[XYZ]

@XYZ lol

Man I'm so glad you weren't offended. Cheers!

 

[Life_and_Death]

Man I'm so glad you weren't offended. Cheers!

it was the way you portrayed it. i could tell it was a joke. you didnt come in here and call me stupid or something like that so i had no reason to take it the wrong way :)

 

[Deleted member 1465]

It's a nice idea but I don't think they would be open minded enough to actually understand or have any empathy. Wanting to help people survive and believing people are wrong and should be deprived of their choice are two different things.
Personally and hypothetically, I might secretly want talking out of it, but I'd want it to be done by people who understood, empathised and respected my right of choice, not by people who just wanted me to think like they did.

 

[Life_and_Death]

It's a nice idea but I don't think they would be open minded enough to actually understand or have any empathy. Wanting to help people survive and believing people are wrong and should be deprived of their choice are two different things.
Personally and hypothetically, I might secretly want talking out of it, but I'd want it to be done by people who understood, empathised and respected my right of choice, not by people who just wanted me to think like they did.

thats why i added this part " im talking they actually open a tab that isnt about how to piss us off instead a tab on how to help, why are people suicidal. actually understand us." lol. i even said they are stubborn and ignorant, it was just hypothetical. kinda like a universe where we could get along and everyone is cool

 

[Deleted member 1465]

thats why i added this part " im talking they actually open a tab that isnt about how to piss us off instead a tab on how to help, why are people suicidal. actually understand us." lol. i even said they are stubborn and ignorant, it was just hypothetical. kinda like a universe where we could get along and everyone is cool

Well yes, and in that ideal universe, I'd be open to that discussion for sure. Sorry if I missed that. That would be a great thing and I wish it could happen. Unfortunately, experience has taught me that it won't. But hypothetically, yes, cool!

 

[Funkymonks]

I'm gonna throw my two cents in.
I was pro life.
My brother took his life 15 years ago which led me to a deeper understanding of the suicidal mind And also caused mental issues for myself. I actually thought I could save the world but I was completely ignorant.
I am totally pro choice now. I don't walk in any ones shoes and I do not have the right to tell anyone what they should do.
i also believe if someone chooses to live then I will support that too.
a lot of pro lifers lack empathy and respect and are in my view quite selfish that they are only attuned to their own thoughts, as in how it will affect them and their life.
As much as I miss my brother and believe I miss him every single day, I would rather he was at peace than be living in a daily hell.
I am very grateful to have open minded parents who helped plant that seed!
In short I accept both sides of the coin but I'm not going to push you to one side just because I think so.
I hope I don't offend anyone
I hope this makes sense.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'm gonna throw my two cents in.
I was pro life.
My brother took his life 15 years ago which led me to a deeper understanding of the suicidal mind And also caused mental issues for myself. I actually thought I could save the world but I was completely ignorant.
I am totally pro choice now. I don't walk in any ones shoes and I do not have the right to tell anyone what they should do.
i also believe if someone chooses to live then I will support that too.
a lot of pro lifers lack empathy and respect and are in my view quite selfish that they are only attuned to their own thoughts, as in how it will affect them and their life.
As much as I miss my brother and believe I miss him every single day, I would rather he was at peace than be living in a daily hell.
I am very grateful to have open minded parents who helped plant that seed!
In short I accept both sides of the coin but I'm not going to push you to one side just because I think so.
I hope I don't offend anyone
I hope this makes sense.

that totally makes sense and im glad you could come to peace with it and have an understanding rather then keeping your prolife point of view, i dont know exactly how it would have effected you but i dont think it would have been a healthy way to deal with it. and i really hope your brother is resting in peace now, im sorry you had to go through that.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I'm gonna throw my two cents in.
I was pro life.
My brother took his life 15 years ago which led me to a deeper understanding of the suicidal mind And also caused mental issues for myself. I actually thought I could save the world but I was completely ignorant.
I am totally pro choice now. I don't walk in any ones shoes and I do not have the right to tell anyone what they should do.
i also believe if someone chooses to live then I will support that too.
a lot of pro lifers lack empathy and respect and are in my view quite selfish that they are only attuned to their own thoughts, as in how it will affect them and their life.
As much as I miss my brother and believe I miss him every single day, I would rather he was at peace than be living in a daily hell.
I am very grateful to have open minded parents who helped plant that seed!
In short I accept both sides of the coin but I'm not going to push you to one side just because I think so.
I hope I don't offend anyone
I hope this makes sense.

I'm really sorry about your brother.
Yes, that makes perfect sense to me. You are someone who was forced by horrific circumstances to try and see things differently.
So often it's the case, that without hideous experience, one's perspective can never change. If that is true, then I wouldn't want anyone to be open minded enough to have their perspective changed IF they had to go through that. What you gain is not worth what you lose.
Now it's my turn to be uncertain about making sense.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

This is a nice thought and in an ideal world yes, we'd have people that see the value in life around to support us when we are struggling but want to recover. In practice people's failure to respect that we are ultimately the ones to make the choice on top of the fact that they feel angry and offended by suicide and negative world views stops this from happening.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'm really sorry about your brother.
Yes, that makes perfect sense to me. You are someone who was forced by horrific circumstances to try and see things differently.
So often it's the case, that without hideous experience, one's perspective can never change. If that is true, then I wouldn't want anyone to be open minded enough to have their perspective changed IF they had to go through that. What you gain is not worth what you lose.
Now it's my turn to be uncertain about making sense.

you made sense to me...does that count? lol

This is a nice thought and in an ideal world yes, we'd have people that see the value in life around to support us when we are struggling but want to recover. In practice people's failure to respect that we are ultimately the ones to make the choice on top of the fact that they feel angry and offended by suicide and negative world views stops this from happening.

totally. when i first got together with my husband he said that suicide was selfish because youre passing the hurt on to others. and yes hes right....but why should we suffer just to save you from suffering? isnt that.....idk.....selfish? however after living with me and seeing what my disorders do to me he has a better understanding and his views have changed. he still wouldnt be happy if i do....but at least he will understand and thats all i can ask for

 

[Deleted member 1465]

you made sense to me...does that count? lol

Damn straight it does, I'll take it!

I sometimes think I make sense to no one on this site lol but then I'm sometimes confused by my own views too. I'm of the opinion that anyone who is too certain of their views is a fool. I relish being confused (up to a point) because it means I'm thinking about it. And life IS complicated. If it always makes sense then yet not doing it right!

 

[Funkymonks]

It was actually on a suicide loss page on fb, I was sympathising with a lady who had suffered a loss and all I had said was that time helps to lessen the pain, which is actually true and she started mouthing at me and told me that she had lost her child and that I didn't understand how she felt and that anyone who had lost a child would never get over it. I pretty much seen red and went to town on her, she had no idea about my circumstances, I have actually had a stillborn so I do know but that's not the point.
I got booted out of the page for saying that her loss was no more than anyone else's and that when the lightbulb flashed!
@Life_and_Death and @Underscore
you both make perfect sense to me.
As a result it opened up a whole new mindset which is more agreeable and morally right to me. I just think it needs discussed more Openly so that people can make a choice.
Thank you about your words for my brother, it was 15 years ago and he was only 16.