Constant paperwork and bureaucracy make me wish I was dead

[enduringwinter]

I am so traumatised by my lack of citizenship status. Everytime I have to do paperwork I feel as if I have swallowed a pile of burning trash. I taste the rotten ash; feel it scorch my esophagus, my intestines. And I have to do it constantly. I don't even have enough left of my mind to want to die, I can't even comprehend life or death as things that happen. I only feel this searing decay in my stomach.