Venting Constant feeling of being lost

[AN IDIOT'S END]

I have over 10 college algebra assignments that need to be done by Saturday. I managed to get my hands on some Adderall, but even that isn't helping. I just stare at my textbook and try to read a few words, or make sense of a few numbers, but it's like I never even learned English. Eventually I get distracted, and go waste my time somewhere else. A whole day gone by with no work done at all.

I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know why I took this class to begin with. I don't know why I really do anything. The "lost" feeling is very real. I'm kind of just wandering around. Metaphorically wandering, of course. I can't be damned to get out of bed.

It feels bad. I want to be successful, even if it's a much lower level of success than most would be happy with. I'm not even capable of the bare minimum.

What the heck do I do? Hire someone to take this class for me? What about all the other stuff I wanted to teach myself? I live in a prison.

 

[booray]

It's just a college class. In the grand scheme of things, it won't matter much. Please don't tell us you're thinking of ctb over this! Not to minimize your distress, but this is not something to kill yourself over.

 

[AN IDIOT'S END]

It's just a college class. In the grand scheme of things, it won't matter much. Please don't tell us you're thinking of ctb over this! Not to minimize your distress, but this is not something to kill yourself over.

I'm not going to ctb over this, it's just related to the crippling emptiness I feel on the daily so I thought I'd share it. If I ctb it'll be because I don't have any way to help myself anymore.

 

[AN IDIOT'S END]

Upd8: I am cheating on literally everything. It's an online class so no one can stop me. But I keep thinking about how much I wanted to do well in this class and how I'm too lost and confused to ever do anything worth a damn in my life. Ugh.

 

[GarageKarate07]

I have over 10 college algebra assignments that need to be done by Saturday. I managed to get my hands on some Adderall, but even that isn't helping. I just stare at my textbook and try to read a few words, or make sense of a few numbers, but it's like I never even learned English. Eventually I get distracted, and go waste my time somewhere else. A whole day gone by with no work done at all.

I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know why I took this class to begin with. I don't know why I really do anything. The "lost" feeling is very real. I'm kind of just wandering around. Metaphorically wandering, of course. I can't be damned to get out of bed.

It feels bad. I want to be successful, even if it's a much lower level of success than most would be happy with. I'm not even capable of the bare minimum.

What the heck do I do? Hire someone to take this class for me? What about all the other stuff I wanted to teach myself? I live in a prison.

It can sometimes feel like all the tasks at once are ganging up on you. We all feel it. Taxes work stress depression are always a powder keg waiting for a spark. Not everyone gets that feeling of knowing what we are supposed to do here. There are no instructions and this can leave us all feeling loss. Will a better job help? No. Will a better lover help? No. So we start leaning towards CTB for things that seem like no reason but personally the stress kills us overnight. We get stuck in school and have no will to give a damn about a single assignment. We cant help but ask what the hell our purpose is while our parents and peers seem to be breathing down our necks to be "responsible". Yet the world goes to hell in a hand basket all the same. It's hard to find a place here. You have about 80 years IF your lucky and that time goes by like water. Did I get the best job? Did I make them proud? Did I make myself proud? We get it. It's very very hard. ❤

 

[Toptock]

Upd8: I am cheating on literally everything. It's an online class so no one can stop me. But I keep thinking about how much I wanted to do well in this class and how I'm too lost and confused to ever do anything worth a damn in my life. Ugh.

Cheating is a quick way to obtain results, and honestly I'm of the mindset that if you have an asset that helps you get ahead, you have a right to use it. I wouldn't recommend doing this regularly in school though, as it takes away the actual need to learn the material. I don't know what circumstances brought you to this point, but take small steps to remove the fog, don't worry about cramming fields of information in your head, just relax and take it one day at a time